THOUGHTS OF A FITNESS FREAK

So eat you say……I can’t, it’s 1 am! I had a nap, so I am up late. Otherwise I would be chowing down with my face in a bowl of something right now. I am quite used to dieting, dialing in really nice actually (for you "newbies" dialing in is when your body is leaning out and you got your food down to a science and 2 hours after eating you are starting to get hungry,by 3 hours, you get arrested for gnawing the bark off a tree if there is no food around) I ate late, around 9 after the gym.  I had a big bowl of ground turkey and some spinach. Not your normal competition food, but everyone is different.  Most women would be chowing brown rice, chicken and sweet potatoes about now.  Sweet potatoes and I do not get along, they made me vomit last time, so now I do brown rice.  Totally different animal, but I do the best I can.

Tonight I did calves, forearms and some abs.  it was 1/2 assed actually.  I have been really tired.  I realized I bought Claritin with an antihistamine in it.  I guess I have to drop it and get the regular stuff tomorrow.  I am not good with drugs and am super sensitive to cold meds. I did get in 30 mins of cardio though. I will do more as I only have 3 weeks left as of Sunday.

I got my entry form.  They have up to 5′3" and 5′3" and over, which I do not find terribly fair.  I went against really tall women last time and I think they just make me look smaller. For me to stand next to a 5′7 or 8 woman and be compared……….not feeling it.  This is why I wanted to do both open and over 35.  I thought open would give me the advantage of my own height class (like 5′3"-5′4").  Oh well, unless there are lots of competitors, there will be just the 2 classes. 

Tomorrow is one of my favorite days……sweet back and bis day!  More lats as well.  I am pleased with my back progress actually, not much for me to complain about.  Still not happy with my quad size overall, so this is my weakest part.  This is where posing will have to make me look bigger. The NPC doesnt allow twisting of the upper body, arms straight up and down from the side.  The night show allows for "model poses" usually.  this gives an opportunity for more personality with poses, but in the pre judging…….much more technical.

Im trying not to do my oblique area too much.  They are pretty thick, so I settled for 3 sets of cable side bends and nothing more. seated ab crunches, bench crunches and leg raises.  I did forearms with the ez bar for the most part and supersetted with seated calf raises, donkeys and slide calf machine.  Nothing crazy.  Finished up with 10 on the stepmill and 20 on the recumbent bike while reading an interesting story on plastic surgery for female genitals.  frankly, this is women freaking themselves out.  No man (so far as I can tell) gives a hoot what it looks like below the equator……..he’s just happy he is "getting some".  One more thing for women to obsess about is not necessary!I watch an infomercial on some undergarments made to "slim you down", well crap, more like stuff yourself into like a sausage.  How comfy does it sound to pack yourself into elastic underclothes so tight it actually squeezes you 2 sizes smaller? No thanks! 

have a sweet night!

Fern 

Please keep a heads up ladies!  I will be scouting for female testers for the new “female” stack for Gaspari Nutrition. Still in the works, but includes blogging and forum logs.  The stack will include Intrapro protein powder, Cytolean and Superpump250.  I will be seeking 3 age groups for diversity…… approx 18-25, 26-35,35 +. It should not matter if you intend to compete or just want to get a leaner, stronger body. Serious entries only!  You may be intructed to follow a specific guideline, not just take them and 1/2 ass it at your gym and be dissapointed with ineffuctual results. I myself, started as a tester with Gaspari and found myself pleased with my own results and this is why I signed on with the company.

There is also talk of new Cytolean testers.  Before and after photos and stories to be included.  Perhaps it will be YOU? Check out the product at www.getcytolean.com 

 I am currently “leaning out” for an upcoming figure show in 3 weeks with Cytolean and have found it to be the best I have used thus far.  I have not gotten the “shakes or jitters” that I have experienced with some other fat burners in the past.  Any company can throw in some Yohimbine and caffeine and sell it as a “fat burner”. Questions can be sent directly to me at fern@gasparinutrition.com or via my PM box.  I will keep you updated as much as possible!!!

The checkered bikini and the paintball gun is all I have.  Frankly, a comment in a movie that, “halloween is an excuse for women to dress like sluts” is true…admit it.  A couple years ago I was Paris Hilton (last minute) because I already have long blonde hair, so I slapped on a barette, bikini, miniskirt,boots, big sunglasses  and a big fur coat and said “thats hott” once in awhile.  I got put in a costume contest and lost to spongebob squarepants.  I think I would prefer to be ALICE from Resident Evil….kicking zombie ass and taking names.  I love chicks who kick ass in movies, even with clothes on.   If anyone has any ideas, drop them on me.  I do have an idea for a funny picture to go with my smartass attitude, but I run the risk of having it removed and making people mad.  How very Howard Stern of me…….huh?

Today is a non training day.  Happy to say my entire upper chest, as well as my lats are very sore today. The dumbell over head/laying chest press is a real killer.  You need to try it, but please don’t be like one guy in my gym who i picture giving an emergency airway with a bic pen because he may drop 100 lbs on his face after 3 reps.  He scares me. I do 25lbs for 12-15 reps. I also did alot of cables for chest (crossovers 70lbs).  My numbers are staying pretty consistant, even though I am leaner.  The scale said 116.  I cannot depend on that too much because it could go right back up to 120 in a few days. I supersetted chest with tri’s.  Lots of presses and cables.  lat press downs with the bar.oh shoulder presses seeing it was push day.  I love push/pull days.  Shoulders make it confusing because both days your shouldes are involved whether you are pushing or pulling, so they obviously get hit 2x a week.  I’m always tweaking the workouts. 

Well, better get my hiney in gear…..time to wash my hair.  It’s ponytail day and if I don’t wash it tonight, it turns into bun day and the following day would be SKANK day.  I’m lazy with the girly stuff.  I admit to not being big into hair and make up because I don’t feel like doing it. If I could afford it, i would pay someone to shave my legs…hahaaaa

God’s honest truth……NO.  Am I against steroids?…..no. Clenbuterol and growth, not on either one. Someone always has to say something.  How about ass busting hard work?  How about not whining when it hurts and saying, "I can’t, I want to quit"??????????  I weigh 115 to 120 lbs, do you really think I would weigh this if I took steroids?  they also make you retain water.  Do I look like I retain water?  Do some research and compare me to a woman who uses.  SOME Female athletes do use.  This includes volleyball players and golfers believe it or not……….men AND women.  You probably cant even tell with most people.  I posess a MASSIVE 12 inch bicep…….heheheee.  I am ripped because I eat well and I don’t like sweets much.  I prefer vegies and dip (yes dip) to cake and cookies.  I cut out processed food and white breads and pastas.  I eat real sugar, have cream in my coffee and never starve myself.  I CAN cheat because to compete I do not need to drop 25-30 lbs.  In my work clothes (scrubs) I look 12.  I have always had a boyish body, low estrogen, possibly higher testosterone than some women.  I have always been strong for my size and weighed more than I look.  MY heaviest was about 160 while pregnant and my non pregnant highest was about 130.  I did have cellulite and saddle bags and my belly rolled over my "too tight in the waist" jeans.  I wear small clothes in the gym (like Arnold rolling up his pants to see his weak calves)to motivate myself because there are mirrors on all sides……..to self critique.  I never had a trainer because I can’t afford one and I don’t like to listen to anyone. 

I will post later.  I have to bring my mom to the doctors.

Later

I had a great workout, only to listen to my voicemails and find my sone was evacuated from base.  Finally he calls me back and they were supposed to be sent to some Army base, but now are pretty much walking the streets with no money and nowhere to stay.  Chaos reigns in San Diego.  We got disconnected, so now I dopn’t know whats up…..having a major freakout.  I know, he’s almost 20 and a Marine, but he’s still my kid.

I did chest,tris and some more lats tonight.  Threw in a little shoulders.  I think some guy was following me around a little.  He kept coming to my side of the gym.  At least it was pretty barren in there tonight.  I didn’t have to work out around anyone else, just did my thing. He was cute too……but ah, never date in the gym….thats a rule for me. I can just see it getting ugly because I have had some jealous freaks in my life.  What’s with that?  I would consider it a compliment if a woman was checking out my man. Whats wrong with having a sexy partner? You know your guy friends would be like, "dude, your woman is hot" and you would be like, "dude…I know and she’s all mine"  correct? But I remain single………………..

I made the mistake of looking at pics from other shows in my area.  I get so confused, you know this.  We always compare ourselves to others.  Its like the Musclemania I did and placed 6th.  I KNEW they didn’t like my particular bodytype, but the promoter said I wasn’t right for bikini classic and that I should do figure, so I did it.  I felt so out of place there.  They didn’t want women with muscles, they were more like bikini women.  There is nothing wrong with that, I just didn’t belong.  Not that I have an incessant need to belong, but I would like to compete in a show where they like what I have and other women are  similar. Either that or I pack in the figure thing, but I do like it.

I’m rambling now I guess.  I’m so distracted, my mind is going a million miles an hour because of my kid. 

I’ll chat later.

I woke too late for morning cardio.  I had to choose between a shower and cardio and the shower won.  I work in close proximity with others…..BO is not something I like to share. The fires are still raging in SO CAL…….I know people out there and am pretty worried. A guy got caught SETTING fires reported on FOX news.  What a sicko.

Tonight is chest/tris and lats. Things are going well.  Like I have said before…..wishing for more size, but running out of time.  My gym managaer says he would love for me to "get out of shape and be bigger". He yells at me for doing any cardio, but I feel like a slacker because I am 4 weeks out.    Who goes into  a show with no cardio, drinking creatine? I suppose I could, but I have a fear for my legs.  They are not terribly curvy, so if I lose too much bodyfat I will have chicken legs.  I called and they are mailing my entry forms.  I may be getting a little nervous.  My suit is not done yet.  I told you I am making my own 2 piece, right?  I’ll show it to you when I am ready.

Have a great hump day…watch for pitbulls…hard humpers…….. 

Yeppers, I watched it tonight.  I watched it a couple times before and saw a finale once….cried like a little boy.  This guy tonight drank 2 gallons of water BEFORE weigh in to sabotage another member and showed a weight gain of 17lbs!!!  What a total idiot.  Why would you do something like that?  I’m sure something that underhanded will come back to bite you in the ass someday. I hope so…….  I would really love to be a trainer on a show like that.  To help people transform their bodies and lives would be like a great gift to me. Okay, okay, I’m a big softie.  UNLESS you leave your weights and superset 5 things and I have to dump them on the floor…………big softie…….I call this being "weight hungry".  It’s like I am starving and you took my last cracker.

Thanks for the compliments regarding reaching top 6.  I’m not all that impressed even though I did attain it without showing my pubic mound,ta-tas bigger than my head AND I didn’t even have to bend over and give a potential ass crack and baloney shot.  WHOO HOO for us hard working chicks!!!!  Did I say that out loud???  Uh oh, going to get CONTROVERSY here………bring it………….I hope none of my photos are ever considered "raunchy" or "offensive".  I try to present myself in a strong,respectful (albeit in a bikini)way. You know us women, we jump all over other women, especially in magazines.  I would rather not look at women who look like "ho’s".  I want to look at someonbe who I might want to emulate..this means (to me)someone who’s shoulders I want to shoot for or their quads.  have you seen some of the ladies quads here?  Holy smokes…..I’m so jealous.  Okay, men are different I suppose……..some are just after naked airheads………can’t change that.  Also, love my guys here who treat me as an equal gym freak!!! Lots of beauties, but I need a brain challenge as well.  Pretty gets old, I need some mental stimulation as well.

I started my interview with Rob Carbo, VP RealGainz magazine extraodinaire!! We will go back and forth until we get it done.  I also have to submit some photos and hopefully Tammy will choose me for the magazine.  You can check it out online and it’s first print edition came out last month.  It’s a great magazine about……well, RealGainz.  It has tons of different things and even includes stuff for kids to get healthy.  1 in 6 kids has high blood pressure you know. That is scary.

No training as I stated before.  My legs need time to rest.  Tomorrow night I will be in there doing chest and tris.  I will hit lats hard still.  Super important for figure.  Today I did for food the following.

1 protein shake with water (2 scoops) Gaspari chocolate Intrapro

2. ground turkey 1/2 cup brown rice

3. ground turkey

4. chicken and 3 eggs

5. ricecake with peanut butter…a tasty treat

6 another double protein shake.

I was a pig today, but well under 100 carbs, more like 50 actually.  I will do maybe the same tomorrow, then take it down to 0 on thursday.

I was short on time and very bad today as I did forget to bring a veggie to work. I am usually good about it, but I have 2 sick kids at home. Next week will be tightening up the reins, including cardio and pre packaging meals and weighing them as well.  Portions will be smaller of course. I’ll go over that when the time comes.

fern 

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Legs are made up of large muscles.  I always take the day after off for recovery. A hard workout lowers the immune system, so you are more apt to get sick if you do not allow for recovery.  I really don’t need a cold or the flu right now.

A woman at my work saw my arms today and said to me, "Fern, really, maybe if you were 20 years old or something"…..WTF does that mean?  Okay, I am going to be 40 next July….is that roll up and die time?  40 isnt even really middle aged now.  People live to be 100 you know.  Am I supposed to just settle into sag ass mommyhood for the next 60 years?  I feel good, I eat good and I think I look good. Now I am going to get all "John Basedow" on your asses and say, "change your body,change your life"…….is somewhat true you know.  I was the wallflower, I was the chick who wouldnt say squat when someone screwed me over, so now I have some confidence because I feel good.  Nothing wrong with that right? I’m not saying I turned into some cocky butt head either as that is not necessary. okay, I’m rambling.

A woman I talk to here wrote me an email today.  This personal trainer abuses her verbally in her gym and now at a childrens halloween party.  She says the most awful stuff to her in front of other people. She’s got this strong body just hoping her mind will catch up!  Honestly, I get so pissed when she tells me about her "bully". A couple other people have written to me telling me of their bullies here and about nasty , stupid comments. It crushes them and it isn’t necessary.

It’s funny.  I look through my old pictures and I was thinking I looked pretty good back then and as you move along, you look at them and think, "what the hell was I thinking posting that?’ I find it fun.  I still have Monica Brant posted on my fridge and her endorush ad posted on my mirror in my room.  I’m still trying to get there…..killer glutes!

I’ll be back later.  I have to check in with a few San Diego people in my life and make sure they are ok.  I check the news every few hours.  The fire jumped to Camp Pendleton where my son is, so I have to check up on him from time to time and call him.

Later!!

NEW ME OCT 2007OLD ME FEB 2007

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Yes, that was me tonight.  I told you I missed leg day, right? First off, I go late, like 7pm and I walk back there and there is like 40 dudes…WTF?  Where did they come from?  All the smiths are taken, there are weights on everything and there is no time to mess around. I have maybe an hour and 1/2 to do my thing.  I hit up everything leg press/incline and horizontal, hack squats , seated curls, laying curls, extensions, glute isolator, abductor/adductor, glutes on cables, roman chair, romanian deadlifts, squats and legs on smith……I thought I was going to hurl, but I kept in down. I also talked with my gym manager (ex competitive bodybuilder) who thinks I can still take my superpump for at least another week.  I’m not really holding alot of water.

Oh, back to the new guys.  So, I can feel all the eyes on me.  I was wearing little shorts because I always wear shorts on leg day and they get all jammed up in my butt crack if they are long, so yep, they are short.  No buttcheek display though.  Anyhooooooo……..I decide to mess with them and do some romanian deadlifts righ smack dab in the middle of them……..hehheeee.  I AM evil sometimes.  Of course you have to bend all the way over and display the hammies.  Oh, don’t go thinking I am thinking I am all that……..I wasn’t even wearing make up and my hair was all ratty and in a bun that was falling crooked.  Just wanted to freak them out a little bit.  The other guys are quite used to me by now.

Above are 2 photos of me taken about 8 months apart.  I think the older one was from Feb or March of this year.  I guess being a gym psycho pays off.

I hope everyone in Southern California is safe!  My son is out there waiting to see if he will be evacuated from the base.  Take care,

Fern

Well, I have been here almost a year now as I joined last year in November………so where am I headed?  First off I have to do this next figure competition, it will be my 4th competition in 6 months time.  I would have done 2 more, but am not financially sound for traveling that much.  Then we have the shows next April (figure) and hopefully, scraping up the funds for Masters National figure which I believe is in PA in July. I will be 40 then!  Ewww..just a number,right?  THEN I may want to pick up the heavier weights and cross over into Female Bodybuilding or the INBF’s new division of “fit body” which is “not a swimsuit competition” and “not a female bodybuilding competition”.  It is somewhere in the middle.   It all depends on if I have the balls to do a routine.  Being on stage is nerve wracking, but such a rush!  Did you know I used to be so shy I couldn’t order pizza.  I avoided people and made myself get jobs where I had to deal with alot of people, like bartending, although you do not have to converse much.  Plus most are hammered and won’t remember anyway. Now I am still shy, but it is usually under the cover of “talking too much”………….oh well.

I missed my leg day.  It was awful.  People were supposed to come view my house and my agent tells me this last night, so I had to clean.  I have a big old falling apart at the seams farmhouse with 12 rooms.  Try cleaning that!  It’s huge at 3200 square feet, but needs alot of work.  So, I had to take the kids out while the people came and that blew my while schedule as my gym closes at 4pm.  Guess what?  THEY never showed!! SOB’s!  I blew the whole morning because you have to clean more than when company’s coming because these peope look in everything. So, I spent the day with 3 boys.  I took them to McDonalds (evil mom, but they are all skinny and I only allow it maybe every 2 months) and I went across the way to subway and chowed down a footlong roast beef on whole wheat.  Man, thats a sweetass cheat meal. I took this picture a short while later, so you may see some belly hahaaaaaaaaa!

I’ll go workout tomorrow night.  Right now I have to go do some cardio in my living room. I promised myself that much.  I hope everyone had a good weekend, as short and as fast as they go by………sucks doesn’t it?