Mr. Farang’s mumbo jumbo corner

I had a chat last night with a friend of mine. It’s ironic how life plays us onto similar life patterns. We had a 3 hour chat, it’s good and healthy. Thinking back what we have talked about, I wish we can just hang out and talk even more.

Over dinner, I thank her for guiding me certain principles in life; which I thought it’s simple yet very hard to practice. It is not many from her. Just simple 3 words. Her 3 words repeatedly over years actually imprinted in my head. It guided me through years of working life and it is handy going through a phase of work, life, etc.

She is going through a period of tough times, myself likewise. I could tell we have some unspoken chemistry, which we never think of exploring. She poured out some aspects of her life…love life mostly. You know some people always play the role of giving more devotion than the other party. Some people give themselves away too easily. Some people admittedly are soft hearted and not assertive enough in love.

I exchanged my heart aches, problems and stresses (I am currently going through) with her … I am in situation where I am no longer needed. Not that I need that sense of belonging, I can take care of myself. 

This stage of life really is a puzzle for me that I am no longer needed to play a role in any decision making. Supposed it is a big chunk of life lost. All these big changes happened so fast, I have no chance to react but I took them at stride. With the background where I come from, it gave me the instinct to handle things.

My friend’s life took a turn, in which she wants to explore and get to know other people. It’s regretable that her potential partner lied about his profile. I can’t imagine it but it’s true.

As the conversations went on, I realized; similarly to her, I am not assertive enough, we give ourselves in too much, we have shown more devotion too much, we are too vocal at times, we should not even be talking this right here in this entry …

I thought it is healthier to be more vocal in a relationship or want-to-be-relationship. Guess, it’s not. Instead I received silent treatments, "I am walking away from you" signals, "you’re too pushy", "it’s conscience", "not gonna be free any time at all", etc. May be I am thinking too much. However, I thought it’s more gentle or mature to talk it out than walk away with signals as such.

While she devotes too much and found out it’s not the right one. When she walks, she didn’t make it clean because she is too soft when it comes to matters of the heart. I could tell she does not know anything about love. The defintion of love terminology comes up during our chat, I have to define it. It’s clear that she seems lost.

Love is about 2 unknown people coming together, getting to know one another; they see if they can fit each other, how the way they live can accommodate each other… if it all fails, we move on; we voiced out, we moved on.

It takes 2 hands to clap. Nothing works without a pair of hands. A mistake in relationship or a certain fling simply won’t work without 2 persons.

In certain circumstances, solutions simply won’t work at all without the other party genuinely showing their interest (to work things around).

We can only advise each other upto a certain steps. It boils down to us taking the bold steps and walk the talk.

As for myself, another day goes by, another weekend goes by.  Same ol’ cycle round & round. It remains unsolved.

Drink up … sun goes down, the night is young. Drink til drunk do us part.

I wish her good luck and we end our dinner & talk right then … we’ll meet again, I’m sure.

I wonder if any of you have this experience.

Just by looking at a person, you have a gut feeling that he or she is married or not.

Well, I asked this simply because I have been mistaken for few years that I don’t look like a married person.

New colleagues, new friends, new business contacts, new customers commented the same thing.

Perhaps, I create the "I am not married" vibe around myself.

I find this comment very weird to me.

People are just plain weird.

For the longest time, I feel I am ugly.  Yes, no kidding.

For an Asian in Asia, I do attract some praises from ladies, lesbian or straight.  But I feel very much uncomfortable with their compliments. 

Of course I do thank them out of correctness.  However, deep down inside I feel very uncomfortable.

Personally, I have a wide ass nose, a flap flap ears, receding hairline, poor skin texture, etc. Personality wise, I doubt I could attract any opposite sex.  Sometimes, those more ladies tease me, the more uncomfortable I feel.

I need to shoot a photo with bunch of kids…may be people will think I have many kids and they will stop all these teasing nonsense. LMAO!!!

:-D

Yup…there! I said it. Heh heh …

They are beautiful. The ones you see on the streets are slim & tender. The office ladies are cute … LMAO!

The bar hostess are also slim & sexy… LMAO!

Don’t just reserve yourselves to Bangkok.

Come to Vietnam sometime …

I probably come here for the 7th or 8th time. It would be more frequent visit in the near future. YAY!!!

I always enjoy traveling.

Tomorrow I’ll be going to Ho Chih Minh City, Vietnam for work as well as seeing a few old friends.

Vietnam is on brink of financial meltdown, however. I do worry for the country and the regional financial stability. I can only hope it doesn’t translate into a new Thai Baht crisis in 1997.

Ho Chi Minh City is seriously a very fun place. I remembered running a log under AEN Intrabolic. I have some pictures of vietnam food.

Mr. Farang loves Vietnam!!!

These couple of months have been very terrible for me in terms of relationship with women.

I don’t know how to deal with them.  Being a patient person, I have tolerated their nounsenses for months now. I could see through all the bullshits, all the crappy reasons; I just keep it to myself - how I feel and tolerate those crap. 

Today, I exploded! I have to … I simply cannot tolerate full-of-shit people (whom let me caught right handed).

It’s so ironic that those I care so much about…they don’t bother about me. Those I don’t care about….they relate/call to me, whatever. So ironic! What is going on? Life really plays me out at this stage of my life, that’s hell !!!

While training has going well, recovery/intensity/growth has been on the uptrend. Work has been hectic and I enjoy that work portion because I get to meet people from all circles. However, people I care about/matters of the heart have been on the reverse trend. It’s so unbelievable.

I don’t mean to disrespect women (I love them). But come on, have some freaking balls to tell me off instead of going around in circle telling me "see how!","I’ll reconfirm with you", etc.  Datings & meetings are meant to communicate. They DO NOT lead to sex. They DO NOT lead to bigger things like affair or whatever is going on in their head.

I caught the woman right handed telling me a lie/lame excuses.

You know what?!? I can always go back to my work, my travelling, my training, my new bodybuilding targets. Do something useful for myself.

Skirt chasing is tiring. If it comes, it will.

The western world has tarot card (or was it tarrot cards?). Anyway, I hope you get the words I was referring to.

I choose not to believe in fortune telling. In Asia, we have too many fortune telling, which can be cheating/swindling money purpose. But we do have very genuine and accurate fortune tellers. Still, it is not necessary and I don’t do fortune telling.

Just so happened one time very long ago. A friend’s father who have such ability; told me that I tend to attract the wrong people of my opposite sex. Somehow, it will happen to me at quite a big part of my life.

I have shrugged it as one off fortune telling experience. I continue to live my life the way it is. Not changing much.  But to my surprise, this "attract the wrong people" comment is so true. It scared me sometimes.

If I count the experiences myself, I would be disappointed. It’s not one off. But numerous times and it gets tired sometimes. It’s either I attracted the wrong people and I am uncomfortable with…. or I am comfortable with the person but she is not keen. The situation persist for years. I keep quiet to myself.

It’s funny sometimes I think. While I bust my balls and dick in the gym, my matters of the heart seems to suck big time. And each time, I burnt myself and attracted the wrong people; I ended up working harder in the gym. Pushing myself harder.

This trend continues for many years without me looking back and count each experience & episode.

Today, I am tired. I again push myself harder and harder in the gym. I feel pusing myself working out hard in the gym during emotional turmoils.  When the turmoils come hunting me, I push myself in the gym even more so.

I don’t believe in fortune telling but experiences have reflected itself.  I hope the fortune teller is wrong because it gets me mentally tired not physcially tired.

Today, I am tired……

Mr. Farang, if you can’t stop yourself; you will hurt your motherfucking self…

I do write to remind myself sometimes. At workplace, at home, at many places where I have things in mind to perform; I write down memo or set reminder.

This entry is for the heart. Yes.

So, Mr. Farang…be careful. You either burn the person or get burnt in return.  

http://blog.bodybuilding.com/MrFarang/2008/06/14/how-a-racist-victim-is-called-racist-what-the-fcuk/

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=108258821&page=6

I cannot believe people still making assumptions here.

Everyone assumes every forumer is America based that all are sharing the same culture. Sorry, if such assumption exists.  Don’t make assumptions.  

The world has so many countries. Don’t assume each & everyone is from 1 single country. Don’t & do not think so.

It puzzles me (again)….totally. Am I not allowed to ask question? Are those questions offensive?

Frankly, if anyone likes to make assumptions; I won’t sway people’s opinion NOR will I be seeking anyone, everyone to side me at all.

sorry, I do not agree and don’t see eye-to-eye with anyone/everyone on this matter.

Just asking a GENUINE skin tone question need NOT be seen as a racism remark.

Anyone, everyone can take it this way or other way.

My standpoint is clear …….. ask question.

Anyone failed to see it……..I rest my case.

I do not ask your agreement in return.

Not sure if anyone here agrees with me. I am targetting anyone.

Just puzzled with certain things.

I initiated the idea to buy a gift for someone I feel special to. It only takes matter of seconds to decide. Yes, I am going to get her that stuff.

Buying a gift for someone you feel special to, it needs no special reason. I wish people know that. 

In Asian context, people tend to question the intention of gift presentation. It’s merely being polite & modest.

To clarify things, I have known Asians returning a gift if the gift is deemed too expensive. It’s the recepient’s judgement to decide the gift is expensive. Should the gift is too expensive, the recepient may return the gift.

I can’t relay to this at all, really. I just can’t. I wish I was born an American or a European. That way it would make it easy for me to say "hey, I like you to have this."