Melinda F’s BodyBlog

What can I say about today…you are amazing and you will always have my love and friendship in your life. I have truly seen what an incredible human being you are and that it was I that was blessed to have crossed your path. Its so weird…in letting me go, you have shown me how you have always loved me, what you said to me today, no body has ever said ever in my life…the truth is that I never really thought that you understood the family thing with regards to me and my life and well I guess I now know differently, A brother. Wow…I am the one that is honoured, I know that on some aspects this has been very painful for you but you put aside yourself for me today and you gave me your blessing, but more than that you gave me this offer of brotherly love which you are right…I have never known and it has taken my love and appreciation for you to a total different level. As we walk our separate paths…like you have committed to be there for me at a phone call I too will always be here for you and you are right, we met for more reasons that just a marriage, we have imparted so much into each others lives and I believe we will continue to do so even though it may now be in a different manner. I couldn’t accept when you said that my happiness was most important to you, I doubted your intentions and how wrong I was…thank you for this gift of love and friendship, you’re an honourable man and you have in me a friend for life. Thank you for our beautiful children, thank you for blessing me with your support for the road ahead—Rob, you have amazed me and you will always have my respect for this. I love you and I always will. I will never forget today.

The thoughts that we think will either help us achieve what we want or stop us dead in our tracks. Henry Ford said, "Whether you think you can or whether you think you can’t, you’re right." This is so powerful a quote, that it should be memorized! There are thousands of people who have achieved their goals. However, there are also just as many people who are not achieving what they want. So, what is it that stops us from getting what we want? Well, I believe it is what we think ourselves capable of. We are capable of achieving exactly what we believe or think ourselves capable of achieving. I have to say, that the moment you believe yourself to be limited in a skill, knowledge, or in anything for that matter, you have just stopped your growth and potential. In order to get out of this way of living, you will need to change the way you think and what you believe you are capable of. Easier said than done? Well, I’ll tell you what I believe. I believe that if something has been done by someone else, I can do it as well. If it has been done, does it really matter who has done it? The answer is no, but the point is, that it has come into existence by human thought and action. Aren’t we human? Well, then we can do it to. Each outcome has a recipe. Find the ingredients and put them together in the same order in the same way and you will be able to create the result. Think you can and you will find the way. Think that you can’t and you won’t. If you are in a certain position in your career, what is keeping you from advancing? Are you limiting yourself by thinking that you have to stay in that same position? Will this way of thinking stop you from attempting to advance? Isn’t it our right as human beings to be able to advance ourselves as much as we want to in knowledge, career, wealth, health and really in every aspect of our lives? I believe that to grow as individuals, we need to think we can and remove any idea that we can’t. As a race, we have gone to the moon, sent information through air waves and found cures to life threatening diseases. Do you think any of these things were accomplished by people with a limited way of thinking? Brian Tracy said, "Whatever we expect with confidence becomes our own self-fulfilling prophecy." The answer is clear! Think you can, believe in yourself and in others and have faith that you can do what you want. This will give you the mindset that will empower you to create your life exactly the way you want it.

 "If you think about what you want in your mind, and make that your dominant thought, you will bring it into your life."

Actually, I knew you could do it when I first met you.

When I first saw the hunger in your fingertips and the fire in your eyes.

When you spoke in just that way, with just those words, in just that rhythm that said, “I’m going to change the world.

 Gonna make it a little better, a little sweeter, a bit more true.”

And I remember the way you said that nothing on this or any other planet was going to stop you.

 Then you turned and walked away, confident and clear.

And I remember thinking to myself that you were amazing, that I’d never met anyone quite like you, and I was sure that, if you put your mind and hands to it, there was nothing that could break you.

So there you sit, knowing that today’s the day.

Because I see the way you’re shifting nervously in your chair, the way your body crackles and zaps, the way your grin says that you’ve decided that there is no time like now to move.

You’re going to change the world today.

 I’m just glad I was here to see it.

A time comes in your life when you finally get it… When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere, the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!

 Enough fighting and crying, or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes, you begin to look at the world through new eyes. This is your awakening…

You realize that it’s time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince Charming and you are not Cinderella and that in the real world, there aren’t always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of “happily ever after” must begin with you and in the process, a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

 You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are … and that’s OK. (They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself and in the process, a sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval.

You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn’t do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected. You learn that people don’t always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that it’s not always about you. So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process, a sense of safety & security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties and in the process, a sense of peace & contentment is born of forgiveness. You realize that much of the way you view yourself and the world around you, is a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche. You begin to sift through all the junk you’ve been fed about how you should behave, how you should look and how much you should weigh, what you should wear and where you should shop and what you should drive, how and where you should live and what you should do for a living, who you should marry and what you should expect of a marriage, the importance of having and raising children or what you owe your parents.

 You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. You begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you’ve outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with and in the process, you learn to go with your instincts.

You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive and that there is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a “consumer” looking for your next fix. You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a by gone era, but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life.

You learn that you don’t know everything; it’s not your job to save the world and that you can’t teach a pig to sing. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake. Then you learn about love. Romantic love and familial love. How to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away.

 You learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man on your arm or the child that bears your name. You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be.

 You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love; and you learn that you don’t have the right to demand love on your terms, just to make you happy. You learn that alone does not mean lonely. You look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonizing over how you “stack up.”

 You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK and that it is your right, to want things and to ask for the things that you want and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands. You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity and respect and you won’t settle for less.

 You allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you, to glorify you with his touch and in the process, you internalize the meaning of self-respect. And you learn that your body really is your temple. And you begin to care for it and treat it with respect. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and taking more time to exercise. You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear.

So you take more time to rest. Just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul; so you take more time to laugh and to play. You learn that for the most part in life, you get what you believe you deserve and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen, is different from working toward making it happen.

More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone and that it’s OK to risk asking for help. You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time; FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears, because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and to give in to fear, is to give away the right to live life on your terms.

You learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom. You learn that life isn’t always fair, you don’t always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions, you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God isn’t punishing you or failing to answer your prayers; it’s just life happening. You learn to deal with evil in its most primal state; the ego.

 You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls. You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted; things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about; a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower.

Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself, by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than your heart’s desire. You hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind, and you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

 Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side you take a stand, you take a deep breath and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can.

I have had this for years but its never meant more to me than right now…enjoy. 

I am very powerful!
Whatever I set my mind on having, I will have.
Whatever I decide to be, I will be.
The evidence is all around me.
The power of my will has brought me precisely to where I am right now.
I have made the choices. I have held the thoughts.
I have taken the actions to create my current reality.
And I have the power to change it into whatever I want it to be.
With the choices I make, I am constantly fulfilling the vision I have for my life.
If that does not seem to be the case –
then I am deceiving myself about what I really want.
Because what I really, truly want, I will get!
What I truly wanted in the past, I already have.
If I want to build a billion-dollar business, I will take the actions necessary to do it.
If I want to sit comfortably watching TV night after night –
I will take the actions necessary for that.
Don’t be disappointed in my results –
they’re just the outward manifestation of my priorities.
I will be sure of what I truly want,
because I am sure to get it!

Set yourself free from anything that might hinder you in becoming the person you want to be. Free yourself from the uncertainties about your abilities or the worth of your dreams, from the fears that you may not be able to achieve them or that they won’t be what you wanted.Set yourself free from the past. The good things from yesterday are still yours in memory; the things you want to forget you will, for tomorrow is only a sunrise away. Free yourself from regret or guilt, and promise to live this day as fully as you can.

If you want a thing bad enough
To go out and fight for it,
Work day and night for it,
Give up your time and your peace and your sleep for it
If only desire of it
Makes you quite mad enough
Never to tire of it,
Makes you hold all other things tawdry and cheap for it
If life seems all empty and useless without it
And all that you scheme and you dream is about it,
If gladly you’ll sweat for it,
Fret for it,
Plan for it,
Lose all your terror of God or man for it,
If you’ll simply go after that thing that you want,
With all your capacity,
Strength and sagacity,
Faith, hope and confidence, stern pertinacity,
If neither cold poverty, famished and gaunt,
Nor sickness nor pain
Of body or brain
Can turn you away from the thing that you want,
If dogged and grim you besiege and beset it,
You’ll get it!

I am your constant companion, I am your greatest helper or your heaviest burden.

I will push you onward or drag you down to failure.

I am at your command.

Half of the tasks that you do you might just as well Turn over to me and I will do them quickly and correctly.

 I am easily managed; you must merely be firm with me.

Show me exactly how you want something done. After a few lessons, I will do it automatically.

I am the servant of all great people And the regret of all failures as well.

Those who are great, I have made great.

 Those who are failures, I have made failures.

 I am not a machine but I will work with all its precision Plus the intelligence of a person.

 Now you may run me for profit or you may run me for ruin. It makes no difference to me.

Take me, train me, be firm with me and I will lay the world at your feet.

 Be easy with me and I will destroy you.

Who Am I?

I am called Habit!

There are a lot of bad situations one can get themselves into. Making the wrong decisions, taking the wrong path in life, and so on, but I believe one of the worst possible situations one could ever find themselves in is a comfortable situation. When we become comfortable, do you know what happens around us? Absolutely nothing. Each day becomes just like the one before. We do what we have always done, therefore we get what we have always gotten. We lose our edge on life, our hunger and determination to move ahead and to achieve. When we are comfortable, sometimes we are merely existing, and just existing is not my cup of tea(wait I should coffee–lurve de stuff) and shouldn’t be yours either, when we are capable of so much more in life. It would seem that one strives to move forward and accomplish their goals, they will find themselves under constant attack from others who don’t want to see them succeed. However, this is not a bad thing. It is what you should be looking for. This simply means you are good at what you do, you are making a change, and a lot of people don’t like change.Change is some people’s worst fear… It means an unexpected event in their comfortable lives; it throws them off balance. Change is necessary if you want to reach your goals. You can’t please everyone, and it is never a good idea to try. The trick is becoming absolutely immune to all the negativity others try to push your way. The bonus shall be…. While you are blocking these negative people out of your life, you’ll look around and notice a change. You’ll now find yourself surrounded by a whole new set of positive people who support you and your goals. "Positive breeds more positive!"  Positive friends, accomplished goals, and a better life… Now that’s my cup of tea…uhmm coffee. "When you climb a flagpole, people are going to see you and they’ll want to knock you down, not because they want to be up there themselves - but because they don’t want YOU there." Jerry Lewis, comedian.