I am embarrassed
I am the least photogenic guy I know. And nobody will ever mistake me for a bodybuilder. I look like a strength athlete and I am shaped like a strength athlete. Being able to do good mornings for reps with 400+ pounds is great for picking up big objects like rocks and cars and trees, but it makes one take the shape of a Oompah Loompah. Big hips, big glutes, big abs… i hate it.
So I took a big step today. I took pictures of myself and posted them on Bodyspace. Now, I know that I am stronger than the average guy, but I am humiliated at how I look! And I do not know how to fix it. I have been eating cleanly and I have dropped some BF%, but my camera phone says I have a long way to go.
Now add to that that I am of full-blooded English descent. While I tan easily when I can, I rarely have a tan. I have the complexion of, say, the inside of a raw oyster. Not really white… more like grey. That really brings out the striations!
You guys on this website have been gracious to me, the interloper, the non-bodybuilder. I have nothing but the love for my BB brethren. In fact, I would really like to train with a couple of you guys. But one thing is for sure: I will never stand next to any of you with my shirt off!
I guess folks like us are never satisfied. Whenever anyone asks me how much I bench, I like to answer, "More than I used to, but less than I want!" I know that I have gotten stronger. But really, for just once, I would like to look strong, too. I guess when I get there, I would be bummed because I wasn’t strong enough. And then when I was, I would be bummed out that I wasn’t lean enough. It is a never ending cycle that causes us to push beyond where other humans go. While it may be our greatest strength, it is also our greatest weakness.
