MILF HUNTRESS

I love passion and desire.  I love wanting things I can not have.  MMMMMMM.  It drives me crazy.  lol  I laid in bed the other night, perfectly content, entirely satiated,….and I recognized…..I DON’T LIKE THIS FEELING.  I CANNOT LIVE IN THIS STATE FOR VERY LONG.  Yes, I would rather have a desire that makes me crazy, than total contentment.

Spinning around on the wheel of life.  Depravity, murder, love, sex, family, kinship, hate, lust, the wheel spins round and round, where will it land next?  Intelligence.  This is a very good thing.  I am sure many people still have this.  Yet where are they hiding it?  I look at E. L.  I see intelligence.  Yet he is quite honestly rejected by society on many accounts because of what…? Poor social skills?  Because he refuses to play at everybody else’s playing level?  The people I admire are often outcasts.  What is it that I admire so much?  Their refusal to bow down to society’s standards?  It is pack behavior that I despise.  I see it as weakness.  I look at it and know….that it IS weakness.  It is the weakness in mankind that leads to slaughter such as World War II and the holocaust.  It is this same weakness that leads to mass mind control and manipulation by the government.  Politics?  Political discussion?  Blow it up.  Burn it down.  Start all over again.  Democracy?  It does not exist except in the minds and heart of the common man.  Power corrupts.  So even if a true, honest, democracy were to start, it would last 200 years or less.  What do I really think of people?  I love them.  And yet I want to hit them over the head more often than not.  Wake the f*ck up! I long to yell in their ears.  I would die for a real revolution. Yet there will never be one until the people are starving.  Ever notice how the real issues are scraped up and wiped under the rug?  Everything is the economy these days.  We can see only what they tell us to see.  People’s minds are so easily manipulated.  It is sad. It is a joke really.  God, are we really made in your image?  Or was it the monkey?  Or perhaps the chameleon?  Perhaps the chameleon is king of the world.  Life out there?  I am sure of it.  I believe we are confined here much as the people in the City of Ember were confined to the underground.  Confined without ever knowing the difference.  Without a true sense of where they really belonged; what they were made for.  Yes our hearts are in heavenly places.  I look to the stars and I see HOME.  There is more to life than just the surface. There is so much more to life than what we allow ourselves to see.  People live their lives vicariously through fictional characters.  Books, movies, television.  It is like in the movie Scrooged with Bill Murray.  All our memories have become artificial; manufactured.  If you believe we are not already under huge mass deluge…attempt to live without your television for one year.  Turn the stinking rotten bitch off.  Stop going to all movies.  Every time you see a magazine advertisement, rip right through it.  We buy what they tell us to buy.  We see what they tell us to see.  We hear what they tell us to hear.  We think about what they tell us to think about.  Our very internal and external conversations have become dictated to us.  Let me ask you one question.  How long has it been since your mind has been free?  Or has it been owned since birth?

See my latest goal?  That there was a Tribulus Terrestris induced goal.  I just started taking this again.  Certain  supplements do have an astounding effect upon me.  If I mix up some Tribulus with a little DHEA, perhaps a little ZMA combo, I become a man.  I think like a man.  I feel like a man.  I act like a man.  I get little pimplies all over my face, my back, my arms.  I have racing thoughts like a hormonal teenager.  I spit.  I chew.  I want to kick some ass.  At the most inopportune time, you might catch me grabbing myself.  Ok, none of this is true except for the dirty thoughts and the ass kicking part.  Oh yes.  And the pimples.  Most definitely get the pimples.

With the exception of my new implants that are not new implants, life is going well. 

I go full-time on Monday!  

That ball is rolling quickly and I am excited! 

I am not even going to tell you how long it’s been since I worked full time. 

Let’s just say Warrant and White Lion were all the rage, and Baywatch and Beverly Hills 90210 were both in their hey-day. 

I have benefits for the first time in my life….EVER!

 Including my first ever paid holiday which is tomorrow.

(I have to say something for my boss’ great timing!)

I will also be receiving free medical, monthly flex-time, and a retirement plan. 

 I feel really good about my decision.  I also feel absolutely great physically.  I’d say about as good as new. 

I took today off from the gym, it being my first day without sutures. 

I have this odd fantasy of my skin falling down to my knees while I am running or ellipticaling. 

Tomorrow I will be back, and I think I will push things just a bit.  Maybe work a little tri’s, as long as it is nothing overhead. 

I am speaking new and bigger tits into existence. 

I mean, where does a sexy refined lady of 37 have to go to get a set of Jerry Springer knockers? 

Looking at the old cover of one of my Flex Magazines, I see this title.

 ”A HUGE NEW YOU IN 12 WEEKS!” 

The OCD in me, working to my benefit,  says, yeah. 

In 12 weeks Doc Beautiful will fix his mistake.  And at no cost to me. 

In 12 weeks I will have the Ms Marvel breasts of my dreams. 

San Kalpa.