MILF HUNTRESS

If excellence can be achieved through dark chocolate almonds and olive oil parmesan popcorn, then I am well on my way.  Love the blogs that come out of me when I have 2 minutes or less.  Brooke Hogan?  What was I thinking?  lol  I do love reality television for the carnival freakshow element.  That and it’s a good study in sociology factors.  Also, well,… the bodies are usually SIZZLING HOT.  DISCLAIMER.  ****I only watch television at the gym.  I really don’t want to turn on a program that I’m going to get too wrapped up in.  Music videos work out well.  That Justin Timberlake….He’s still my boy.  Never seen a kid turn on the heat like that fellow.  One night alone.  That’s all I ask.  And for some restraints.  Because I won’t have any.

Fat is sexy. I can’t help it but I really think so.  And watching a fat girl work out is 10X hotter than watching a fit girl.  Sorry, this is just my opinion.  Though it would have been hot to watch Corey Everson or Rachel McLish back in the day.  I think the most beautiful young woman in Hollywood is Brooke Hogan.  She is not thin by Hollywood standards.  Obviously not a fat ass either.  If I was a man I would only be out for the tremendous.  I would not be looking for ordinary.  I would likely be hot for me.

I go to work for the same reason that I masturbate.  It feels so good when I get off.

So you have to wonder, this Kahlil Gibran, what the heck was he smoking?  No doubt most prophets were smoking something.  As were most musicans, the world’s modern day prophets.  Led Zeppelin, Black Sabbath, The Stones, all had their pipes filled.  Nowadays Beck, Kings Of Leon, yeah, Hank III.  Miss Maddi is not against a little mindful expansion.  Besides the munchies, the only reason I don’t indulge, being the same reason I don’t do steroids.  Too damned hard to come by.  Also, no guarantee that what you buy is pure.  My body is my temple.  I am sure Kahlil Gibran would understand.

And what is it but fragments of your own self you would discard that you may become free?  If it is an unjust law you would abolish, that law was written with your own hand upon your own forehead.  You cannot erase it by burning your law books nor by washing the foreheads of your judges, though you pour the sea upon them.  And if it is a despot you would dethrone, see first that his throne erected within you is destroyed.  For how can a tyrant rule the free and the proud, but for a tyranny in their own freedom and a shame in their own pride?  And if it is a care you would cast off, that care has been chosen by you rather than imposed upon you.  And if it is a fear you would dispel, the seat of that fear is in your heart, and not in the hand of the feared.

~~Kahlil Gibran

There is something very special about a man wanting to marry a lady.  This is a man’s way of saying, “I choose to never live without you….In fact, I will not.”  Every woman deserves this feeling.  Every woman deserves a man who will make this commitment.  So what takes some men so long?  Ladies, if you have been with a man 7-8 years and haven’t bought satin shoes or a flower bouquet, it may very well be time to move on.  And men, what is there to fear?  Divorce is always an option.  Sure you may be masturbating in back rooms and corners for hours.  That’s ok.  I know you’re an animal.  You know you’re an animal.  All your lady really needs to know is, that you’ll always love her forever.

Had a dream last night in which me and my daughters were all in a roller coaster together.  It was either The Mamba or The Timberwolf.  We were probably 3rd row back.  The dream began with the long incline up the tremendous hill.  There was that sense of excitement, but also dread one gets when in such a situation.  Only in my case the dread was taking over the excitement.  Now I love rollercoasters.  But in my dream I was thinking of the un-naturality of the situation, what a danger it really was.  I was thinking, “this is my last time ever riding one of these crazy things”.  I just wanted to get it over with.  So we are still ascending the gigantic hill, and we come to that brink.  The coaster does that temporary pause that it always does, and then we start the big rush down.  I can feel the coaster lift up off the tracks, the way one does when getting to the bottom of the hill in the very last car.  It feels pretty much the same way, and we are all enjoying it for a moment before we realize, “this thing is not coming back down on the tracks”.  In fact we are falling downward in a hill like fashion, only there is nothing but air beneath us.  The dream skips from falling, to we are all still in our cars but on the ground.  Emergency personnel are coming.  I feel no pain, and neither do any of those beside us.  As a matter of fact, I don’t feel anything.  Inwardly however I know, there is no way we could have taken that kind of landing and still survived.  So I was right after all. This was my last ride.

So what do you do when irritated and pensive, having a bad day?  I’ve always found shutting out the lights to be the best solution.  So I went to bed early last night.  Feeling shitty sometimes is part the stock of life.  Was talking to a friend the other day about things.  One thing was how I have come to the conclusion that despite working full-time, the reason I am still broke, is because I am inwardly rejecting abundance.  Somewhere I decided that those who have much are *******s, and I just don’t want to be one of those *******s.  I have a whole lot of Hank Williams Jr in my soul.  That bastard is rich.  But he sings songs about the common hard working man.  I identify.  Same thing for John Cougar Mellencamp.  My heart and soul belongs with the country people, the common man.  Not those jet setting about, living in oversized houses, driving outrageous cars, eating off china plates, snub nosing those with less, classifying value based on income.  And yet I want the good life….at least in the sense that I define it.  Hank Jr and JC both have it.  Yet they have not lost their connection to the people and the land.  Somehow I need to change my inner paradigm about what equates “being a good person”.  How I can stay absolutely real and true, while still acquiring abundance.  Having abundance and nice things does not equate being a shitty *******.  At least not always.

It is going to be one of those sorting thoughts aloud blogs, that perhaps is best confined to a journal, but oh well.  One thing I appreciate about blogging communities is the humanity; the sense of, we all are the same yet different.  Just got done wrestling with my husband.  In which I swore I was going to make him tap out.  He didn’t tap out because as a man he would rather die first.  But I did hold his ass down for a good long time.  Ahhhh.  Girls are back from speech and debate for state.  Went to a friend’s afterwards, as they are teenagers after all.  Youngest outside with the puppies.  So much to do inside the house but I would rather ignore it.  Or think myself into more beautiful circumstances.  Down to my last Atkins Bar.  5 in 2 hours.  Also 2 nine ounce containers of nuts in the same time period.  I am a bit of a mess today.  But I allow myself these moments.  I allow myself to be human.  I did give up my sugar-free soda pop habit.  A relatively new habit, but also a bad one.  I can suck 44 ounces in about as many seconds.  This is all supposed to be about health after all.  Want to stay on that train.  I do love being alone.  Working full time, I need two full days to recuperate from shaking hands with the world.  Some people slowly die from lack of company.  I slowly die from too much company.  My work out kicked ass today.  Except that I had to walk on incline.  I left my jogging bra at home.  Something satisfactory about working my tris.  Especially right now t-bar push downs and weighted bench dips.  Now go and hug a fat person today.  Or at least tell them Namaste.  Something else.  Next weekend…. I am going out.  Betchya I start my period tomorrow.