MILF HUNTRESS

I told 22 year old I want to take him to the zoo and buy him a red balloon.  I want to watch him carry it around a bit, and then I want to make him eat popcorn.  While he eats his popcorn, (washing it down with purple grape juicy juice & a little plexi straw), I want to take him over to watch the gorillas.  Afterwards, I will take him back to my/his apartment where I will proceed to fist f-k his ass. Afterwards I will rub his sweet head, saying, "There, there, there".  Seriously, even with a genius intellect, this young man has all the emotional development of a 4 year old little boy.  Which I think is charming and beautiful.  I want to call and thank his mother personally, only he just won’t give me her phone number.   Stud muscle boy also has a stud muscle younger sibling.  Actually he has 4.   Only three are illegal, and one is a girl.    I do find myself having odd thoughts and desires though.  I want to take this boy shirtless to the Arnold (red speedo, red speedo!) and lead him around on a chain.  I want to insert objects in his urethra.  Exceptionally large objects in his big round bodybuilder ball ass.  I want to hog tie him with a rope.  Ok, these are his desires not mine.  I just want to change his poopy diaper and enwrap him in swaddling cloths.  Oh you must have been a beautiful baby, you must have been a beautiful boy……

I’m anti-social.  But I guess you already knew that.  Introduced my daughters to Slipknot’s,… “People Equal Shit” song the other day.  Afterwards, I became dependent on the kindness of strangers.  1.) Town practitioner who stopped to take my daughters to school when we were stranded on a lonesome highway hill with a tire blow out.  2.) Coworker who sent her husband with tow truck to bring me to town  3.)  Friend gym guy who drove me to work so I wouldn’t have to walk from the gym.  I love people.  I hate people.  I can not stand depending on them.  I love children because they are pure of heart and see things clearly without judgement.  Small children love me…which means that I am a good person.  Many parents do not love me.  Which means they are insecure or jealous.  A male friend asked me not so long ago if women have a hard time with me.  I said, “Not secure women.  I like secure women and they like me.”  Being thin does not make you secure.  Knowing who you are does.  I have spent alot of time lately fearing old people.  They show me what lies ahead, which is not pretty.  Then I met a 91 year old woman who made me love old people again.  She drove herself to the library.  Requested a book on Martha Washington.  Had the intelligence and curiosity of a college student.  I loved her.  I wanted to be her.  Sent husband tonight to get me some comfort food.  I am in need of comforting.  Financially, it has been a rough couple of weeks.  When daughters get home I am taking 9 year old to work out in the basement.  Yes we have some weights down there.  No I never use them.  She wants to workout with me so bad.  I want to encourage this interest.  I can live a night without mirrors.  Very proud of oldest daughter.  She got a 30 on her ACT, and a perfect 36 in English.  Spent my lunchbreak entirely naked today and writhing in orgasm.  I was at the park and thought better of it.  I could wake up with a police officer standing over me.  Mm,  police officer.  Decided to move things to a warmer, more private climate.  Don’t ask me how I knew it took 10 minutes or less.  Come on.  You do this too. 

What I do is all consuming.  It is a passion.  Some might say an addiction.  Training takes up a large chunk of who and what I am.  It has become my identity and my purpose in living.  Take away my training and you may as well shoot me.  I would rather be dead than not training.  Today I made it to the gym 3 times.  I would have preferred one long chunk of time, but fate had other plans.  As in a tire blow out in the morning, then a lunch break workout.  So it worked out 45 minutes X 20 minutes X 30 minutes.  Some people spend their time at the boats, some at the all you can eat buffet, some in front of the television set.  I spend my time at the gym.  To me it is time well spent.

I definitely use this hot body to my advantage.  Had one man rubbing my back this weekend, while another rubbed my feet.  I was spread out on my friend Tiff’s couch, text messaging muscle stud boy.  The men doing all this rubbing were most definitely attempting to get down my panties, so were becoming quite perturbed that all my attention was going towards text messaging and not their loving arms.  The rub down was heaven itself.  Man on top working arms and back like a piano, guy on bottom giving feet and calves all the attention that you know they respect and desire.  Muscle stud boy however, is muscle stud boy.  Keep your pretty boats, keep your fancy cars, keep your all expense paid trips to Key Largo.  Give me young muscle.  When these men finally realized I would let them rub me all night long, but was an all take, no give situation, they left.  However, they took my cell phone with them.

I am signed up through work to take a series of Dreamweaver Classes in late June.  I am going to use this opportunity to build my own web site.  About female sexuality.  It’s fun to explore.  The nice thing about being a middle aged female is the ball is now in my court.  I remember those days of being young and naive, ending up in positions (wrong side of the cock) I didn’t ask for.  When you are born and raised to be nice and compliant,  you find it hard to be firm when the time comes to be so.  This works well to the male advantage, not so much to the female.  I was once going to slip the ol’ chastity ring on my daughters’ fingers.  I found it a little hypocritical to do so.  So now my word of advice is this; “YOUR BODY, YOUR CHOICE”.  This is my word of advice to every woman out there, regardless of age.  Nobody owns you.  Do what you want.  Just make sure that it is what you want.

I totally scored a 5 LP set of German Opera at the library today.  Mint condition.  God I love opera.  Know nothing about it…but I love it.  Greatness in any way, shape, or form, I love.  Bodybuilding is this to me.  Taking the body to it’s extreme.  Which is why I have no problem with the steroid freaks.  I admire them actually.  I weighed in at 161 this morning.  Also tested my body fat which was sitting right at 24%.  Honestly, not bad for the size I am.  I would like to lose around 20 lbs.  Fat, not muscle.  Work is going fine.  It’s monotony, but there is a certain rhythm to it.  My best friend has hexxed me again, which always comes down to flat tires, broken down cars, and a dead mp-3 player.  Everytime.  Like a charm….or a curse.  THANKS BUDDY.  Saw an old friend of my hubbies.  The old headbanger type.  I can always count on him to turn me on to the good music.  Asked him top 3 bands I should be listening to.  He said, Slipknot among the 3.  Synchronicity happened and a young girl came into the library wearing a Slipknot t-shirt.  I asked her about them, and she looked at me surprisingly, then borrowed her ipod for me to take a listen.  It was love at first throttle.   I immediately wanted to start killing people and eat the heads off of babies.  This is almost guaranteed to spice up my workouts.  Makes Pantera sound like a lot of pansies.  Good, angry, hateful music.   Almost as good as German Opera. 

I don’t care if I AM 163 lbs in the morning.  I am 163 lbs of the finest horse flesh your ass has ever seen.  For Valentine’s Day, me and hubbie celebrated the old fashioned way.  Our fourth (and final?) swinger party at Crazy Dave Caves.  Can I ask you a question?  Is it just swingers, or is it that 1 in every 5 men has a foot fetish???  Dearie me, but I don’t care, because I got perhaps the BEST foot rub of my life tonight, by a very sweet and gentle perv.  I believe his name was Dave too.  Hubbie made me leave before I dragged both their asses into the family room for a little demonstration.  So we get home, and I ask hubbie, “So just what is it that makes my feet so special?”  Because men are just all over them.  My honey (who bought me a dozen red roses today) said, “I don’t know…..maybe it’s the way you play with them.  Whatever it is about those fancy feet….the way you pick things up with them.  Used to freak me out.  How the hell was I to know you were just plain lazy?”  All I know is, even more than my breasts, men LOVE my feet.  Which I think…is sweet.  Happy Valentine’s Day.

I have been contacted by Dan Ray of Muscular Development Magazine, BuffBunnies.com about a possible photo shoot.  Not just once, but twice.  Now just how does one go about saying, “I am so not worthy???”

I mean, you go from being awkward teenager, to obese pentecostal mom, to middle aged bodybuilder, and,… do I just not see what other people see? 

This man has shot the great, the fabulous, Melissa Detwiller, only for starters.  I am so not in this category.  And yet, this is my goal.  To become one of these women.

I returned Dan’s initial email with, “Can I drink tequila before my shoot?   At least 2 shots?”  lol 

To take your own semi clad photo via self timer, and to pose that way in front of another living, breathing, human……male……two entirely different things.

Yet, this man’s work, so classy, so elegant, so sexy doggone hottt.  I would be a lunatic to pass up the opportunity.

Which means to get back to eating and training HARD.  Because my body right now is PUFFY.  Looking in the gym mirrors today, I felt like a work pony.  THICK, STOUT, built for hard work and heavy labour.   Which is EXACTLY what I proceeded to do. 

I am creatine loading.  Up to 159.  Missed a full three days of training because I was at  librarian school in Columbia, MO this week.  Thought I was going to die.  Not from the conference itself, but from the lack of physical training.

There I did get to meet my favorite 22 year old muscle stud from bb.com however.  

Online meetings oftimes get a bad rap.  People posing, lying, about their identity, who they are, what they are about.  I have been talking to this young man for about 4 months now, and let me tell you, the experience was nothing but positive. 

Walking into his apartment, a 20 foot countertop loaded with every array of supplement and protein powder on the planet.  We talked training, we talked past experiences of being a fat ass, we talked of everything we have shared via the net for months now. 

It is very nice to meet someone’s spirit before you meet their face.  And very nice indeed to have the two match up in person.

Be careful, be safe, but know that when you expect good things to come to you…they often do.

So I had a middle aged female from southern MO contact me on another web site. She is divorced, and seeking to live out her unfulfilled sexual fantasies with a female.  Mid-life is definitely time to fill in the blanks and leave no stone untossed.  We were discussing outrageous libidos, female orgasms, etc.  I told her the thing I love about it is the temporary escape from reality.  For those 15 seconds everything fades out of the background, and your mind is singularly focused.  While I was considering that someone seriously needs to fix this…arrange a way for the human body to have prolonged hour long orgasms, I realized something.  Anytime I am ”in the zone” the same thing happens to me.  Life with all it’s worries, idiosyncracies, threats and insecurities, fades out into the background.  When I am at the gym, nothing much matters except my body, and my next set of weights.  On a very good day, I am singularly focused, unaware of the presence of other people around me.  On the very best day, training is an orgasm.