My talking out loud

Hi all! Happy day after Holloween!

Im here with just 3 more weeks till my first figure comp. And I am soooo excited! And Sooooo nervous! Im scared Im not "lean" enough, im scared Im gonna cramp on stage and Im scared im gonna be sick to my stomach from nerves….. But Im so excited on the other hand to finally accomplish another goal!

Im one of those girls that looks at it like no matter what as long as i get up on that stage im a winner, i mean look at all I have accomplished to get me there… By the time I make it to the stage I will have set another milestone…losing 100lbs.! But really who am I kidding..I WANT TO PLACE.. better yet I WANT TO WIN!!!!! There I said it! I want to win!!.lol!

Funny, i never really gave any thought to winning before, it was just about the accomplishment and experience but the other day I realized just how many of my friends/gym peeps were going to attend and it hit me…oh my goodness..what if i don’t even place! Im gonna feel like a dork in front of all them! but in the same thinking it hit me that I may even win…wow! Guess I just never gave the winning/losing any thought before…strange!!!

Yesterday was my cheat meal and i made turkey burger chilli and had some tostitos to dip in it..yummm!!! Today is a high carb day, so i get gluten free bread with 3 of my meals..which i love cause I make grilled chicken sandwhich…mmmmm! So really the diet hasn’t been so hard to follow. Now Fridays are a diffrent story…its my day 3 no direct carbs and my biggest volume workout day…not sure why that is, especially since its an arm day and as you can see they are my weakest link…

But Im pushing on and counting down! Peak week is scaring me a bit…My trainer has me 4 days no carbs then starting thursday I load..we are not sure about water yet, she says she will give me a more "natural" water pill and not fully deplete me cause of the cramping issues.. she keeps talking about spillage and how we don’t want that and such…why does she have to scare me like that??? Im already anxiety ridden but to add spillage to my issues…thanks! lol! So now im worried that I can’t pose, i am not lean enough, my inner thighs giggle when i walk and i have to watch that i don’t spill….REALLY? Did i mention how excited I am for my comp…? lol!

Just a side note… I am now 2lbs from losing 100…wooohooo! Now that 100 was NOT from bypass surgery! It was good old fashion gym time and better eating choices! Not that there is something wrong with the gastric bypass, but it wasn’t a choice i made, i chose to work it off my way…so 3 years 9 months, many vacations, many bags of m&m’s(my fav.) many hours in the gym and many hours reading and learning…here I sit at 122lbs, my lowest weight ever!!! (sorry, someone messaged me about how great it must have been to keep going after "bypass" surgery..kinda made me mad!!!!since i didn’t have it!)

As always thanks so much for reading!!

Happy Sunday!

MGG

Here I sit 9 weeks out from my first figure comp. Today should be a good day as i lost another 2lbs this week, its coffee day and cheat meal day! Not to mention that this week I get to take off from weights, so its cardio and posing only for me! But instead im in a funk!!! It started with the fact that I dissapointed my 9 year old, and its gone down hill from there! My child was supposed to do a cub scout function starting at 7am an hour and 1/2 away, but my other child has a football game that i have to be there for and momma (me) has to get her workout in..I tried, i really did but I couldn’t find someone that I trusted with my child to get him where he needed to be and keep an eye on him till I could finish with the other ones game and such… So he woke up to find out his mom is not super mommy and he isn’t going!!! I feel so bad!!!! My house is a wreck! and I really want some Candy corn!!!! lol! I took my pics for my coach and I can’t see past that they are me and im in a funk and its peeing me off that Im feeling this way! 9 weeks! Thats all i got left…just need to get out of this funk and work it!!!!! But i do have to tell ya…im a little worried about a week off…who does that? Seems odd to me, like no weights and all cardio, won’t that take away some of the muscle? Im told its to keep me from peking to early and to rest my body in prep for my new kick booty workout…who knows…see im in a funk!!!!!!

Morning all! So here I am 10 weeks out from my first figure comp. and so far things are going great! Diet and workouts are really working for me… I have dropped 2lbs a week so far and as long as I still drop a lbs a week I will remain on track and be able to keep my weekly cheat… Meet with my trainer yesterday and worked on my posing/walk and my 1/4 turns…kinda makes it all feel real. She was training with her trainer that gets her stage ready at the pro level so I had a few sets of eyes on me…They seem to be a little worried about me peaking too soon and having spillage the day of the show…not really sure what all that means but it doesn’t sound appealing…lol!  Here I was thinking I had a chance of not getting lean enough in time but there afraid of peaking too soon…crazy! So after I left my coach yesterday I got a message from her and they have decided to give me a week off from weights next week… So starting next Moday all I have is posing and cardio and rest…Then the week after my body will be all rested for my new workout to start… Here I was thinking I could just have a extra cheat  meal to slow things down…lol! See why Im not training myself!!!!!Genetically I have nice legs and through this process they have already cut up really well so while my upper body is a little lacking they are scared my legs will cut up way to much for figure so a break it is…..

I will do as she says as so far she hasn’t steered me wrong…Cardio is still at a minimum and my diet is 7 meals a day that I am actually enjoying, with a weekly cheat, im thinking that as long as my body doesn’t cramp up on me and my celiacs and hypoglecemia stay at bay…im golden through this process…

Im looking forward to another good week…talk to you later!

So I thought I was 12 weeks out last Saturday and was soooooo excited but then sometime this week I went to the shows web site and realized The show is a week later than I thought….so….Today I am 12 weeks out…lol! So far prep is going well, im down another 2.5lbs this week. Cardio is reasonable and i still get my cheat meal so so far I have nothing to complain about…lol! I put on my suit today for my update pic for my trainer and I was pleasantly suprised. I can actually see my self making it to the stage, i mean i actually see that this dream is possible…woooohoooo! 

So here I sit 12 weeks out yesterday from my first figure comp. I preped for one previously and looked pretty darn good but chickened out so ever made it to the final stage. This time I am determined. So far things are going well, I had my cheat meal of Sushi last night, and will probably keep that as my weekly cheat for as long as its allowed. Diet is going great, Im learning to get over the idea of what I am eating when and just refer to it as meal 1, meal 2 ect… Cause the idea of egg whites and extra lean turkey burger from bfast is pretty gross!! Training is great, not too much cardio so far, just 30 min here and there. Im struggeling with abs though. I can’t seem to train my abs with out getting a charlie horse type of cramp in them…its so crazy! I try not to give up but it hurts so bad that after it has happened I usually wait about 10 min and then attempt to hit them again but I can’t seem to fully enage them for fear of cramping again. Now they just spasm all day, so weird!

For those of you that have done this before or just trained pretty hard, is it normal to feel like your muscles are cramping a little? cause some days its other muscles too, Is it just cause there tired?

I am still a good ways out from "looking" like I should compete but I have decided to just relax, let my prep take me where I need to be and if in the end Im still not competition ready, well then I won’t get on stage but I will still look pretty darn good, and it won’t be cause I didn’t work hard enough, just that I didn’t work long enough…14 weeks just may not be enough time for me….. Time will tell…..

Morning all!

I recently made a decision to hit the stage again, this time however I will not back out! I had so much self doubt last time, and It was taking all the shine out of my moment so with only 9 weeks of prep left I backed out. Looking back I realize how stupid I was! I look at my prep pics and even I can see now the potential I had. Foolish me!!! But in the end it was the right choice as this time around it makes me more aware of my mental issues…lol! So here I go again…PREP! This time around I am scared of not making it (getting lean enough), so only a very select few of my peeps know about it. I am however going to work my a$$ off (literally too) and follow the nutrition to a T and most of all RELAX and enjoy this process after all its what I am choosing to do not something that I have to do. I had an awsome coach last time..Big shout out to team jpfit! So amazing are Jason and Cat! I KNEW that with them prepping me I could rock it, but again …my mental issues took over..lol! Look at my progress pics, their skills are on display by the transformation I made from dec. to march….amazing they are!!! But…… This time i went a diffrent route, for a few reasons..1. embarrasment, I didn’t want to tell them i was gonna "try" again..get over it right??! 2.Local, I wanted someone close by in the event of a melt down and for support the day of.  So, my coach this go around is a WNBF (i think i wrote that right) pro, she is a former bodybuilder who turned figure, so she has tons of stage experience. She lives about 1.5 hrs from me and gets the emotional aspect of the prep. I worked with her last time as she was my posing coach.She will paint me, help stuff me in my suit and calm me down on stage day! Im very excited to work with her, but……Prep is soooooooo diffrent this time. I have total faith that she know what she is doing, its just strange to have a cheat meal and not actually start full blown prep till 12 weeks out.. Kinda nice but, scarey too. I keep getting reminded that she has to get 20lbs off of me, yep, gotta love honesty huh? althouh the way it gets said to me is" your 20lbs overweight, we got work to do!!!" lol! See why Im worried!!!! lol! So here it goes..my journey to the stage begins, only this time I will not back out! That being said, if this momma doesn’t lose the muffin top and back fat…this momma ain’t puttin on the heels!!!!!! LOL! But It won’t be cause I didn’t work hard enough!!!!

Isn’t that what this is all about, helping others? Well, I have this friend and she busted her butt  in a 12 week challenge and although wasn’t chosen for the overall winner, the judges saw an amazing Transformation and chose her to go into a "peoples choice" contest.  I am all about giving "props" to those who transform themselves cause they are what insired me on my journey. So for me this is a fun thing to promote and get others to join in and vote. Voting ends may 15th so go and check out theses ladies and there amazing work.. www.tightcurves.net/transformation-challengers.aspx

My friend Is Roseanne Weston, check it out and see what a great job she did, and Please Vote!!!!!!!

Hi all! I am not a big one for writting a blog but today I felt the need… Maybe someone out there can help… You see I know I am not crazy, there is something very wrong with me but I think its as simple as a deficiency, but in what is the question….

Im a 34 year old mom of 2 with Celiac disease (have to maintain Gluten free), who has lost 95lbs over the last 3 years. No big deal with any of that but starting back in Nov. crazy stuff started. I have always had muscle cramps, you guys know a charlie horse here or there is no big deal but I also got them in my feet and my abs (ouch, abs hurt) But that was a syptom/side affect of Celiacs, again no biggie . However one Nov. night after a REALLY bad sugar binge (that included 2 DD Caramel lattes) I woke up drenched in sweat and with a charlie horse cramp from my inner thigh down to my foot, i was paralized and in so much pain, it came and went in waves of a spasm that I can only describe as childbirth contractions…omg it hurt! Finally went away after about 10min of pure panic..the next day I was so sore and limping. Most would think maybe I should drink more water…trust me I drink plenty! After that episode I stayed away from binging for a while but the cramps started in other parts of my body..Abs became a hit or miss thing with me, sometimes i could work them other times they would lock up and cramp on me. (kinda gross actually, you can see it get all twisty when i lift up my shirt) Then started the pec muscles, i would move a little then here comes a charlie horse..ouch. ( i am a sight as I walk around massaging my chest at the gym and breathing heavy trying to get through it…lol!) Calves are impossible for me to flex with out cramping, same with my hamstrings. I was actually in Contest prep trying to pose and i started with the back cramps( no i am not kidding..) I  stopped with contest prep like 10 weeks ago (not due to this but me just wimping out) and thought it would be better with out all the working out but it has actually gotten worse! I am not crazy with my workouts, I am sure there are many of you that train harder or more intense than me so i know it isn’t overtraining.I went to the dr’s who of course told me i was over exercising and needed to stop and be happy with what I have accomplished…lol Is she crazy or what?? She humored me and ran some blood panel of test, I was sure I would get a call that said I needed to supplement, Iron,calcium, something..but no I got a call that said all is fine, im overtraining…pure crap! Well the cramps keep on…At this point I never know where or when but thinking its just gonna be a fact of my life.. Then we take the boys camping (in a camper of course) and after enjoying a couple smores we turn in for the night only to wake up the campers to me screaming in pain as both legs spasm and cramp from the inner thigh to my feet..omg, i would birth another baby, drug free before going through that pain again! I can’t move my legs when it happens and it comes and goes in a wave of pain and tightening..they are lasting longer now, that was about 15 min.

The next day i can barely walk from how tender they are and I feel like i got hit with a truck, this was the 3rd time for that specific cramp (thank goodness, cause it HURTS!) but the others are averaging daily. I teach group fitness and its embarassing when I so much as pick up a dumbell and my pec muscle cramps.. Went back to the dr’s but requested a diffrent dr. Explained it all again and she pulled up my last blood work…low and behold..there was a problem…Seems my Creatine Kinase is "above high normal" from what I was told this has something to do w/muscle breakdown..Also my ALT levels were also flagged as "above high normal"this has something to do with my liver…so off to more testing I go.. This time I am dr ordered rest before the test..(the muscle breakdown being high could be do to working out close to the test)so here I sit on day 3 of total rest and its killing me! I hate not doing something, but I know my health comes first. I am having a battery of blood work taken and I am doing that sugar test thing where you fast for 8 hrs then drink pure sugar and see what it does to you….fun! So i have to sit in a lab for 4 hours while they monitor me…even more fun!

Meanwhile my muscles are still cramping and stiff, i walk like I am 80 (no offense to you 80 year olds read this!)and I can’t get cold cause the whole body turns into a pretzel then…that is embarrasing, I know first hand, just happened at my sons little league game. I was freezing and went to stand only calf muscles said no thanks, and down I went..lol! Only to have to keep walking the rest of the 2 innings cause if I stopped something cramped…ever had a charlie horse in your Lat muscle????It’s not fun!

Anyway…Sorry for all the drama and long post but I am sure there is someone…anyone out there in this workout world that could shed some light or offer advise..again, i think its as simple as a deficiency somewhere but where??????

Happy weekend all!

Mende

I often wonder about this…Now that I have lost almost 95lbs, am I supposed to feel diffrent? I know I look diffrent infact people that once knew me will have a conversation with me and not even realize that its me the once 220lbs mom of their kids friend. Or I love this one… some guy at the gym was amazed of my before and after photos, he put it very well when he said most people lose weight but still look like themselves just smaller he said I could have commited a crime lost weight and no one would have known it was me..lol! Its true I look sooo different especially in the face, but the strange thing is I don’t feel any diffrent. I am still me, I am happier now but I haven’t changed at all on the inside. I am still a total goof ball, I was taught when I was young to never forget to laugh at yourself, and I have perfected this! People that know me know that what comes up comes out and know that I am always joking or finding humor in everything, even the tough situations, but I was always like that! At 220lbs I was the same person just in a bigger shell! I think sometimes people look at me and think that because I lost weight and got this new figure that I am diffrent on the inside and that is so far from the truth. I am probably more self concious now then ever, I fidget with my clothes all the time, if people look my way I assume my zippers down or I am dressed like a dork, hubby keeps saying to get over it, get used to it but how can you. Someone told me the other day that it takes time and eventually your mind will catch up and you will get over that "big girl" mentality but I kinda like being the same girl I once was, just cause my looks change do I have to change??Who wants to go through life thinking their S*** doesn’t stink, what fun would that be? Personally I am proud that I was once a big girl, it made me stronger as a person, as a mom and as a wife. I never will go back to where I was physically but sometimes I feel that at least back then people didn’t look at me like I am something I am not. I just want to be me, the once big mom of 2 who loves to laugh especially at myself, who is addicted to peanut m&m’s, and who worked my butt off to get to this weight loss goal ! So for others that have gone through this weight loss transformation, are you diffrent now?