Thoughts, Reflection, and Randomness… Feel free to skip
Looking back I realize my entire life, I look to people who were fit, and in shape as "lucky." It was probably because everytime I was with my mom, and she would see a beautiful, slim, woman, she would say things like "Skinny Bitch" or "Lucky Bitch." Since I was little I always remember her being 250+. I was not allowed to play sports in school, because we lived about 15 miles away, and she did not want to drive me there for practice and games. So about the most activity I had was horse back riding, and walking around the ranch. There was no roads to roller blade or skate board on, and I had outgrown my bike years earlier. Needless to say, there was not a whole lot of activity, and LOTS of food. We were ranchers for christ sakes, so we ate like them. BUT. As kids we didnt work off enough to stop the evil cycle of weight gain.
Now after having my eyes opened by my own transformation (in progress), I realize that ANYONE can be thin, if it is a priority to you. It wasnt to my parents, and that rubbed off on me. Now realizing that I can do something about it, and its not all about genetics, I can’t stand walking around the way I am. There is no excuse, and it sure as hell shouldnt have taken me this long. By the time I hit my 21st BD, I will be in excelent shape, and I will be having the time of my life.
By my birthday in may this year, I have figured out that I can lose 61 lbs (Losing only 2 lbs a week) and be looking pretty damn good. And by Dec. 09 I can lost all of the weight, 125’s total. I figure from Jan-May I can get pretty toned, and be looking fab. =] I am going to buy a photo shoot for my self as a present =]
The best motivation for me, is this website. Looking at people’s before and after photo’s show me that I am not the only to come from my size, and not only to be thin, but to be healthy, fit and strong. To be the best me I can be. I sit here and look at pictures of women, and I can visualize the weight falling right off me, and slowly sculpting the me I want. The me that I can be proud of. But for now, I AM proud of me. I have beaten those 19 pounds, and I will not stop. I will never stop. This IS a battle I can lead for the rest of my life. I don’t have time anymore to be fat. I do not have the TIME to stuff my face. LOL. Come along way from saying I dont have the time to work out HAHA. I try to encourge those around me, but I see them standing in the same rut that I was in, The rut that I was in only 8 weeks ago. I want so badly to help them, but I guess they havent found the right reasons to change. I hope that someday, I can be an inspiration to others, the way that all of you have been an inspiration to ME.
Most of all I want to go to my high school reunion, ( I was about 245 all through HS) and walk in looking amazing. I want others to see that people can change, and for the better. I want to give those mom’s that let their body slide, a little flicker of hope that they can do it too.
How amazing it will be to walk into virtually ANY store, and buy things that fit. To buy things that make you look wonderful. Wow. How neat would it be to be able to shop online, and get pissed that something is too big. =] Thats the day I am waiting for.
As for today. I tried on some of my old clothes, and I fit into three of my old jeans, size 18!!! They are still alittle too snug, but before I wasn’t able to even get them on! I figure another 5 lbs and I am sure that they will fit!!! Currently I am wearing either 22-24-26 size pants (And swimming) I am so excited to fit into it all!! Even though I am almost down to the weight I was when I was wearing the size 18 pants, I still look COMPLETELY different. Must be all of the weight lifting, but daymn. Looking hot =] (If I may say so!)
One more pound till I hit my Mini Goal!!!!
My mini goal after that is to hit 145 by Jan 1.
