Clash of the Titans: Marmoset vs. Lenin
It has taken young King Marmoset until this very day to convalesce after his armageddon conflict with the undying overlord of THE USSR! Here is the tale!!
Marmoset on the walls of the Kremlin
King Marmoset appeared out of the void one Saturday morning (some would say that he was still soggy with booze). Lenin’s minions must have been tipped off by some unsavory friend of darkness that an attack was imminent (probably a monkey some beggar employed that appeared to give your handsome narrator the stink-eye). Even the mighty King Marmoset had to wait in line for his chance at the Overlord; wait in line with actual Europeans. It seemed King Marmoset was not alone in his thirst for vengeance. The line was very long indeed.
The stink-eyed monkey
Upon checking all cell phones, cameras, sabers, and nunchuks, King Marmoset was permitted to make the long walk to the tomb of Lenin. Yes, my incredibly portioned reader, thou shalt not photograph the zombie master! It is forbidden by orders of the Red Army their damn selves! The long walk to the tomb was filled with great peril for there were many commie zombies buried along the red walls of the Kremlin. All were dispatched for the sake of freedom and for living humans everywhere!
Finally, the tomb!! There, the Overlord was waiting for ol’ King Marmoset! A great, great battle ensued. Sucker punches and kidney chops were landed by both battling sides. The tomb, the Kremlin, Red Square, and even reality itself was destroyed in the battle! Who won? Even King Marmoset knows not. What is known is that upon waking up in the rubble of Moscow the authorities “obliged” with vodka for King Marmoset to rebuild everything by hand. It took me 7 minutes to do so. The zombie Vladimir Lenin was not to be found. Yet, according to media reports on the Internets, it magically reappeared in its tomb the very next day. Yes, King Marmoset knows not who won, but he gets the feeling it wasn’t him. Dread to you, lord Lenin!!! We shall meet again!
The only penance for failing to slay the Overlord is to lift. Lift hard!! Lift with great vengeance and furious anger!! I must be bigger. I must be stronger. I must seek out a great master of the weight and suffer under their cruel tutelage. I shall travel west and seek out the singularly luminescent DanicaX. So sayeth I, King Marmoset, now and forever!!!
The zombie of Peter the great and his bride. I slayed them. Note: I built that church when I was two just to show off.
May 6, 2008 at 6:23 pm
Yinz, I’m trying to post pics, but am having great difficulty. I’ll get them up as soon as I can.
May 6, 2008 at 6:37 pm
Lenin’s tomb. Been there, done that. Did you defeat him in immortal combat? Answer: unknown/unknowable
May 7, 2008 at 8:24 am
Danica, you are cute when you are clever!!
May 7, 2008 at 8:06 pm
The midget and bunny costumed chick were great and all, but a monkey on the street - PRICELESS!! And sorry to hear about the Lenin encounter - damn security for not allowing the SuperPump to be transported in unmarked plastic bags, you would have taken him down for sure!! One day, one day…
Have a great time in Omaha!!
May 7, 2008 at 8:37 pm
Agreed with Pixi! Though it would have been amusing to see what it did when the Reds sniffed the stuff
May 8, 2008 at 6:14 am
Am I missing something?! I don’t see a picture of a midget nor bunny costumed chick! This is something I need to see!!!!!!!
Okay, how terrific does your vacation sound!!? And look! 
Massively jealous, all around that you got to go to Russia! And get hammered with your mommy!! Not that I would ever want to get hammered with mine. 
But I’d get hammered with yours!! 
May 8, 2008 at 8:00 am
GREAT PICS !!!!!!!!
May 8, 2008 at 1:52 pm
Okay the one pic of the lady in the big tree shaped dress….did you package check her?…lol just a thought…lol I’m with JJ…. my Mom died 3 years ago….. can I drink with yours??
Hey bring Mom to the Bash!! that way we can all drink with her…. 
Keep on Keepin them Reds away!
Real Men Have Mass!
May 12, 2008 at 3:00 pm
The Final chapters are being written as we speak. There will be a rematch and the outcome will be to your liking. Consider this prophecy!
May 14, 2008 at 2:14 am
pics were awesome! Sounds like you enjoyed yourself. ohh….and LOL at GJ’s comment!
May 19, 2008 at 7:21 am
Wow, that is awesome! Great pics!
May 20, 2008 at 7:36 pm
King, yes you had to hand over your sabre and nunchucks: But did thou, forget his majestic pair of hand crafted throwing stars, secret pocket of M-80’s, shoe implanted IED’s, bic ball point pin with heat laser, belt buckle flame thrower and / or the secret natural gas concussion bomb? Mighty King, anyone of these may have tilted the scale in your favor while battling the evil one!…Shakes head…A plebians work is never done….