King_Marmoset!’s BodyBlog

Strange things are afoot in Marmosetia these days, my gorgeous shapely pretties.  Yes, above and beyond the standard strangeness of battles with the undying, boulder lifting, radioactive monsters, and Ruskies.  The mighty King Marmoset himself knows not how to interpret these obfuscated truths.  Time will reveal the answers.  Here is a clue.

Looks like liberty lovin’, freedom indulging, red, white, and blue King Marmoset is leaving this here country and going to Russia to get all hammer and sicklely soon.  If you are like me, everything you’ve learned about Russia in your life revolves around the Cold War, communism, Red Dawn, fresh water seals, frozen baby mammoths, Siberian tigers and their great thirst for vengeance, and ice hockey.  Sorry, 1980 Soviet team!!!!  Anyone of you pristine and highly patriotic Americans, and one German, ever been to Mother Russia, St Petersburg and Moscow to be precise?  A brotha known as King Marmoset would like a few words with you.  

Should all this come to fruition, rest assured there will be pics of King Marmoset destroying Red Square on here and on the news.  Those red SOBs ain’t seen anything like KM since the monster Rodan destroyed the Kremlin back when earth’s mightiest monsters joined forces to destroy the alien evil known as King Ghidorah.  Alas, many good monsters were lost that day…

In closing, WOLVERINES!!!!!!!!!  

King Marmoset, post bulk, ruber Red in Russia:  

Rodan on the left with the wings

Note:  Why on earth would Gozilla bring his kid to fight King Ghidorah?  Also, who is that kid’s babymomma?

Note2:  Why would all those monsters band together to fight King Ghidorah?  All the earth monster do all day long is destroy cities.  Do they really care an alien monster shows up and destroys some cities?  I guess they do care.  

King Marmoset is currently in the process of growing to 8′8" tall and a weight of 888 lbs.  Relax, the King’s plan is to do this via eating and lifting super hard instead of using radiation like the last time.  Once the King attains this colossus size he will drift off the face of the earth and float into the lifeless, loveless void of deep space.  There, hostile alien cultures will be devastated or possibly romanced, binary stars will be mashed together to make a cosmic crucible to forge new proteins, and awesomeness and high fives will be dished out to all peaceful beings DanicaX style.  

In your squeaky little clicks and whistles voice you peep, "But GreatOne, how will you grow so large without the radiation you have depended on before?"    

I shall utilized the growth serum known as The Ninja Bill Get Large Shake.  This shake in addition to the regular mass quantities consumed with great prejudice will produce this large size.    

King Marmoset’s version of The Ninja Bill Get Large Shake
3 Omega-3 eggs
2 cups low fat milk or water
2 scoops whey
1 banana
1/2 cup blueberries  

Throw all this in the blender with some ice cubes, curse out loud, and enjoy.  The curses add essential swear word acids and adult language vitamins.  

Thus, King Marmoset is now 4 lbs larger than before.  Sure, sure, some of that is peppermint ice cream, but the rest is the good stuff.  Godspeed, King Marmoset!!!