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King_Marmoset's Stats for August 2007
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Archive for August, 2007

Proof That The Gods Are Cruel

Thursday, August 30th, 2007

The ice was absolutely brutal for our game on Tuesday (my second game of the night), and one of our defensemen blew a wheel and hit the ice tremendously hard.  He was really hurting for a few minutes, but shook it off and finished the game (it ended up being our seventh tie in a row).  After the game, the D-man noted that he hit the ice so hard he ended up getting a hemorrhoid.  It’s mind numbing to me to think of an impact so brutal you get a hemorrhoid.  He also said it’s not the first time that had happened.  

Hemorrhoid.  Think about what that is.  The gods, both old and new, are cruel and devious to allow something like that to exist.  We are not to know their ways.  So sayeth I, KING MARMOSET, now and forever!!!!!!!!

Mental Vomiting Is Good For The Soul

Thursday, August 9th, 2007

I’m just going to vomit out all the stuff in my brain that regards to what we are doing on here.  I can feel the tightness in my mouth and the extra saliva right now.  Get ready….BLAHHHHHHH!!!!

1.  Chicken in a can = $2.79 per can.  
     Chicken of the Sea in a can = $.79 per can.  

After eating 2-3 cans of meat a day I had to suck it up and buy Chicken of the Sea for $ reasons.  I abhor seafoods in a can, but it was just too expensive eating land bird from a can.  Thus….

Do you like Seafoods in a Can?  

I do like them, King Marmoset, I am!  

I do like them in a box.
I do like them with a fox.
I do like them in a house.
I do like them with a mouse.
I do like them here or there.
I do like them anywhere.
I do like Seafoods in a Can.
I do like them, King Marmoset, I am.

2.  We all know that when we are in the gym that you can’t do 50 reps of 150 lbs curls or 200 reps of 345 lbs deadlifts.  However, when you are doing physical labor all the normal rules go out the window.  I just can’t move a ton of stone in 90 lbs increments from one spot to another over and over again for hours without hurting yourself.  These incidents have hampered my training more than any laziness or drunken stupidity could.  

3.  With all this body building stuff we are doing, we get into strange artificial comfort zones.  If you think about it, it’s strange to have 20 cans of tuna in your work desk, a huge container of protein powder in your closet, stacks of pre-made meals in your fridge at any time.  So, what happens when you go on vacation?  Your comfort zone gets cluster-****ed nigh onto Hell.  

I went to Ireland recently, which I’ll get to in a bit, and I realized how impractical this body building life style is.  There is no way to pack a huge thing of protein powder and all your clothes.  You can’t generally bring huge caches of food on international journeys.  No bed and breakfast has a gym.  Basically, when you travel abroad you are also taking a vacation from body building.  Shit happens!  Enjoy life for a week and then get back at when you get home.  

4.  The Irish, generally speaking, eat shit I’d never eat:  whole milk, fatty sausages, sandwiches with buttered bread, tons of gravy, etc, but yet they ain’t fat like Americans are.  And, if you are thinking Americans are fat because of fast food, those green bastards love them some McDonalds and Burger King.  Oh, and the drinking….Guinness is like drinking liquid bread and everyone does it.  

As near I can figure it, the Irish stay thin because, while they eat awful shit and drink a lot, they aren’t snacking and loading up on soda.  Americans, put your goddamn chips down, you fat bastards!!!!!!

5.  I am so goddamn portly now it’s not even funny.  You just can’t eat all that garbage over there while washing it down with Guinness and cakes and main-lining friggin’ potatoes and stay trim.  However, there is hope on that front…    

By my guess, I’ll have burned off all that extra blubber by Sunday at the latest.  Aside from getting exercise which had been lacking abroad and getting back to a cleanly diet, I’m experimenting with the HeyZeus909 method of carb manipulation.  I can’t go zero carbs due to playing hockey, but I’m now doing a half cup total of carbs on hockey days; today is my first non-hockey day so we’ll see how low I can go on the carbs.  

6.  To anyone out there that has heard me comment about my neck injury in the forum, a miracle happened in Ireland.  My bratty little brother was pulling my head to the left while I was looking straight ahead.  A disc that had been out of alignment for 17 years, and medical science couldn’t fix, popped back into place.  Mr brother, St. Cletus, laid hands upon me and I was healed.  Praise St. Cletus!  

I’m done vomiting out this info now.  Return back to your lives, puny mortals.  

My brother and I having some pints at the Duke in Dublin.  Yes, those are viking helmets.  
The Lads



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