King_Marmoset!’s BodyBlog

As far as the weekend, King Marmoset will only say that every single wicked drink was consumed, the heavy labor instilled by Brother Marmoset for Granny Marmoset’s new retaining wall was brutal, back and leg days were fantastic, the food was unclean, the women were worse, and the sun…

Long has your handsome narrator coveted the destruction of this scornful and spiteful star.  Even through thick, plush fur the sun’s energy lashes tormented milky flesh.  Today, King Marmoset wears the crimson skin and is not happy about it!!  

Now that your narrator has eaten clean for weeks, he can wax on what happens when things get dirty.  Granny Marmoset is the most wizened of all the Marmosets, but she knows nothing of clean food.  After hard slavery on her behalf she rewarded the brothers Marmoset with hot dogs.  If you eat hooves and hog anus then you shall feel like hooves and hog anus.  So sayeth I, King Marmoset, now and forever!  

More to write later.

It would seem, glorious King Marmoset, that your marmoset ancestors have laid out a challenge for you the three day weekend that is nigh:  is it possible to eat clean, avoid slurping up drink, work out like a demon possessed little monkey all the while courting the attentions of female marmosets using charm, guile, cunning, and displays of physical prowess?  We’ll see, but things don’t look good because at 10:30am you just carried 4 cases of beer…INTO WORK!!    

Not to mention there is a wedding at 4!  Ah, but you are a sly one, King Marmoset.  I know you’ve made plans to leave work early and dead lift before said wedding.  Make sure you get some nutrients in you before wedding o’clock strikes.  You’ll need real food in you before the slurping of drink begins!  

There is nothing much more to say on the subject matter.  Report back to this here blog on Tuesday with tales of immaculate productivity or soiled shame and despair.

I now realize another powerful motivational force provided by Bodybuilding.com:  graphs.  Seeing as I, King Marmoset, work out by myself in the dungeon, I never paid attention to my maximum lifting capability before.  I never retained from one week to the next how much I could actually lift as long as I was getting a good work out.  No longer!  

My stats increase by the week, but it’s not as though I’m getting that much stronger.  I’m breaking through mental plateaus to new strength levels.  Each week I get a little braver and try a little more weight.   Maybe strength never was physical?  Maybe it was always mental?  Maybe your momma is mental?  Lets not go there at this time.  

I love this site!  Aside from banishing all physical ailments, this site has revolutionized my work out passion like nothing else!  With your help, Bodybuilding.com, I will become Emperor Marmoset!  However, I can’t let the other marmosets know my plans.  They are devious and will strike against my interests.  

That is all for now.  

King Marmoset - Over and out!

Friday:  Good, good work out!  The machine really does make everything fun.  However, bad, BAD King Marmoset for the drinking!  BAD!!

Saturday:  Another really good work out.  Then, hockey!

Maybe the finest game you’ve ever had, King Marmoset.  2 goals (game winner), 2 assists, 5 minutes for fighting, and a game misconduct.  Not bad for 35 minutes worth of work.  The only bad thing was two dislocated fingers from catching a puck.  Yeow!

Very, very good not drinking after the game!  Yes, there were luscious women tempting you, but very good!  

Sunday:  Very, very good lift.  A new high on deadlifts was attained.  The Machine complemented the bench nicely.  Very good.

This week:  2 hockey, 2 kung fu, and lots of working out.  Do calves, traps, and abs ala HeyZeus909.  Report back with results!

Hockey:  I was damn near dominant last night.  I skated very hard, controlled the puck and play well, ran the point well, and, most importantly, laid a good break out pass all night long.  Oh, not to mention skating through 4 guys and scorching the goalie.  Nutrition makes every better.  Even hockey.    

Lifting:  Perhaps the Machine is a gift from the gods!  Perhaps aliens did send it you!  Perhaps your future relatives sent it through time to help you get jacked!  IT MAKES NO DIFFERENCE!  I enjoyed lifting before, but with the additional of the Machine I’m damn near obsessed.  It was so much fun to crank out all those exercises at very heavy weights last night.  Do not questions where or how the Machine came to you.  Just exploit it!  

Food:  I need to go grocery shopping again.  I must acquire the coveted alterna-meat triumvirate of turkey, bison, and ostritch!  They will make a nice feast mixed with the regular land animals, cow and chicken.  Yes, they will all be mine and I shall scarf them greedily!  Oh, King Marmoset, it will be SO delicious!    

Watch the boozing and salacious women this weekend!!

First:  King Marmoset, you know there is only so much physical capital that can be spent.  If you lift 6 days per week, play hockey 4 days in a row, go to martial arts, and do lawn work in the hot, hateful sun you’ll pay greatly for it.  Especially if the last day of lifting is super-heavy squats and deadlifts.  Just keep this in mind for the future as the last two days were not fun.  

Second:  The first 6 weeks of training are over.  Great results and knowledge were gained.  What is the game plan now?  

Mass - Eat more!  
Lean - Keep on eating clean and lay off the booze.  
Power - Train as hard as you can.  It’s been building up and it won’t stop!  
Stay Consistent - Keep on keeping on.  

Another good 6 weeks and all that was lost will be recovered.  

Third:  The Machine…It showed up from where?  The future?  Aliens?  Old gods?   It doesn’t matter.  The Machine has all the rest of the tools you have long coveted.  Exploit this gift like a drunk virgin on prom night.  

You’ve had two physically required days off.  Back at it tonight.  Report back tomorrow with your results.  Praise be to you, King Marmoset!