Renga: Brickish

Training is going good, save for the dumping the weight lifting part of it. No time, and well, I don’t really bother focusing on it, especially after the workout that coach puts us through during normal classes, so i think I’ll be getting away without it for a while.

Progress is good. I got confused for being 150lbs today, which I think is a good thing. I haven’t been near a scale in over a month so I’ll just assume that I’m probably mid 160’s based on that. I don’t know where body fat is, nor waist size, nor do I truly care at the moment. I think just for record purposes I’ll

I was sick for about a week, and got over it finally, so I’m more or less just happy as a clam that I’m training again and not coughing up parts of my lungs. That’s a good thing. Plus, it seems that things are starting to click. I’m starting to be able to see when things are going south in a hurry, so I don’t get caught as much. Well, I’m still getting caught, but I’m able to put up a better fight cause I’m able to defend against them for longer.

Plus, the guy that’s been sort of coaching me during open mat, Stephen, says that I’m improving. So I’m pleased. I’m not sure what the deal is with me paying money to the school, but at this point, it seems to have become truly a moot point. On top of that, a few people are offering resources to me for training like books and such. I’m going to ask for some of the ones I heard are good next week so hopefully they’ll still be available to me for some time.

I’m behind on logs, whatever. I’m going to keep them up as I can, but the idea of doing them 100% on the dot every time because I don’t have the time. So yeah. When I get them.

Anyway I’ve gotten confident enough to start rolling with the other people.. I rather enjoy it, moreso than just straight up technique. I’m focusing for now on survival time and learning when I’m in trouble, which getting in a lot of it so far, yeah, I can say I’m beginning to learn that. I’m not entirely sure how to keep track of the movements, much less how to actually get to them. The only really identifiable positions I’ve been in have been Rubber Guard and Dogfight, and that’s about it.

I was going to write them down but I always forget my notebook that i had started in back in the dorm, so I don’t have it. So I should either do that or just make up my own names.

 Related: Soda’s down to five today, and I can tell. Can’t wait to get rid of it entirely.

OK, so here’s the quick stats:

Shadowbox: Worked transition to Hip tosses and suplex pummels, as well as transitions out of Orthodox to Southpaw where I’m comfortable. This will add a nice use of my thrust kicks to push back on the move back to my good side after a strong kick.  

Pushups: 30

V-Ups: 20

Flat Bench: 6×6x30 Hard at 3.

Yes, I’m working up slowly because I don’t want to kill myself with the whole five miles so as each weight day comes around, I’m adding to it slowly. Why there wasn’t one last Friday like there should have been was straight up busy and tired. Had to move Sensei again this past weekend on Monday, so that stunk.

 Joey (a friend of mine and my old Tae Kwon Do instructor) and I spent a good chunk of the weekend discussing my move to MMA. He wants to help me along, which I’m greatful for because his accupressure skills will come in handy in a corner, IMO. We keep joking about me putting the family back on the map with winning the UFC Lightweight Championship but that’s a long way off. Plus I doubt that I’ll be a lightweight. I think after everythings said and done, I’ll still be a Middleweight, but that will have to wait until later when I learn my Jiu Jitsu.

I’ve the striking portion of my evaluation tomorrow. If I didn’t note it, I’m working out of Dynamic Edge Martial Arts, and they do an evaluation process of incoming students to see where they start at. Joey doesn’t approve of the school and Sensei doesn’t care (Neither do I), so I’ll worry about that later. Figure I can get a base here and transfer if things don’t work out with at least some knowledge.

So I was thinking about what the numbers are. I’m not so great on the math and the assumptions by the internet may not be the greatest indication, but my goal is going to be numerically at 175 for the end of the school year at 10% bodyfat and a waist at or less than 32".

So, it’s going to have to be a cut to 160 again followed by a bulk back to 175 I guess. I only figure a cut because the way things are going to run for me this next semester school wise seems to lend itself for a cut first.

 Not that I know what the hell a cut is. Help? How does one go about it? I think I was on one last year, but wasn’t paying attention.

Anyway, the schedule’s looking like working out Monday Wednesday and Friday and doing Jiujitsu on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I may or may not sneak boxing in on Monday nights depending on my work schedule. I really don’t want to waste the momentum that I’ve built up through the summer. I don’t think it’ll get wasted by swapping to jiujitsu, but it probably won’t be the same if you know what I mean.

 So, here’s to becoming a Jiu-Jitsu major.

So I’ve done some work thinking about where I am and what i want to do. A lot about fighting and how I want to get to that point. A lot also about my physical goals, as I’m realizing that the two are really starting to go hand-in-hand.

This summer I’ve done Sanda boxing, which has been a BLAST. I wish I could find a Sanda instructor in Springfield to keep going with, but no luck. I guess I’ll have to settle for just plain old boxing. Through this, I’ve gotten a clearer idea of where my strengths lie. Ironically, in my strength, not my speed. I’m slow (still) but still can take a lot of punishment. After poking around through the UFC, I’ve kind of figured out what I want to do.

Flat out, I’m going to set my goal to be a walking 175 at 10-12% BF.  That means I’ll fight at 170 or 175 depending on the organization, which sets me looking at dropping 3" from my waist based on the measurement this morning and the past few days.

 I’m proud of myself for that, by the way. I didn’t think that I’d be keeping it off this well, nor that it’d be a lot better looking than it was. That and seeing this goofy-ass picture of myself that’s my profile picture is rather encouraging. I think I’ll hijack my brother’s camera so I can keep taking them.

 I’m accomplishing this in this way: No soda. Training as often and as much as possible. Getting into a lifting routine while at school. Getting into a cardio routine that I can keep at home. Watching what I eat and do it the way I’ve realized I do naturally with the numerous small meals when I’m hungry. Riding my bike everywhere I can, and pedaling the entire way. Take the stairs every time. No matter how embarassed, how stupid, how hurt, how tired, how stressed, how emo, how whatever: Don’t give up. 

If it backfires and I find myself back down in the 160’s again, to hell with it! I’ll just adjust and plan accordingly! I can change weight classes no problem! My power can hold out no matter where I am in weight.

Numerically, I figured out that most people my height are sitting in the 30-32" range for waist, and my number’s 32". I’ve done it before, and I was so close to having abs, I swear I could see them getting ready to pop out. I want that SO BAD. Not only because it shows that I’m dedicated, but that I have done something that I’ve always wanted.

 I’ve realized that I’ve always wanted my six pack. Really badly. It just so happens that with wanting to fight, the level of fitness happens to be close to that. Convienient, no?

 So it’ll happen. My goal is to be able to fight for my martial and biological families near the time that I graduate in late 2009. I want my parents to see who I’ve become, and my Sensei to eat his words.

 No shit. He says he wants to see it happen but doesn’t believe I can do it. He can bite me. I’m going to do it, and I’ll point at him from that cage with my hand raised and shout "I told you Mother F****! I CAN FIGHT!"

So I had a great chance today–With Tampopo out of commission due to a migrane, I had my chance to specify what we did. Granted, that’s when my habit of dropping the ball when asked a direct question derailed my train of thought and caused me to go "Awaahanawahahna?" (Lit: What the hell are you asking me for?)

Rather than actually going ahead and doing what I wanted to (Facing down my fear of guns) we did exactly what I didn’t want to do. (White-Belt training) Lemme put it this way, in the family we do things a little strangely. In order to start training, people have to essentially give up their belts. (I gave up a Yellow-Green in Shotokhan Karate, and a Blue in Ku-Ke Tae Kwon Do) I usually just tell people we do, just to make things easier for them.

Last saturday, as noted in the last post, I passed my Rolls, marking that I was ready to begin full training as an Uchideshi and the first book, Water. This is equivalent to that "hey, here’s a white-belt" thing that usually happens everywhere. Yeah. Year and a half for me folks. Appreciate that little piece of cloth that you got for free. Granted, I am the first person in three years or so to pass rolls and move on, but that was softened by the fact that everyone else is right behind me.

 Isn’t my fault the dojo’s started completely over three times since I’ve been there. In retrospect, I’m thankful for it, but at the same time, I could have been learning the last few parts of Water by now and be moving onto Earth. But hey, I can roll like crazy now, anytime, anywhere, on or through anything. Kind of nice actually. Falling without hurting myself is, as I found out tonight by a slip on the mats, completely integrated into my body. It is nice, and the length of repeats is very, very welcome at this point.

Anyway, with the fact that everyone’s in roughly the same place, that means that Sensei can really start ripping into us with the old ways. Especially since I’m up in front ahead of everyone, if just by a little. Joy! We get to start the Martial Arts again!

 Yeah… if by Martial Arts you mean not the American version. When Sensei says old, he means old. For instance, where there’s usually just a shuttle run at a normal dojo, we’ve got to stop our entire momentum and tag something without moving it. Where there’s just a pushup drill or something equivalent, we’re diving through rolls and falls from positions we’ve never done before. And where others just practice stances in order, we’re flying through them, including a nice little kneeling to prone dive that I’m naming the buster, just because that’s what my stomach felt like.

 You see, sometime last night I prayed for an excuse to stay off of cardio machines, and I feel that I’ve got it. I got it really good. There’s a curse from a book called By the Sword by Mercedes Lackey. Terrible opening, just skip to chapter five, but the curse is "May you always get what you ask for." Yeah… I got the idea Lackey. *sigh* Got my cardio with a side of bruising. Wonderful!

 I actually couldn’t be happier with it though. If Sensei is actually meaning to put us through something even worse than what we did tonight, which left my legs literally grinding out from beneath me if I tried to hurry between places on campus afterwards, I think that I’ll have no problem accomplishing my little American Gladiators goal. Coupled with the fact that I’m staying here in Springfield to train, and yeah, I say that this actually has a shot at happening. Completely rediculous as it is, yeah, I think I have a shot now.

 Yeah, I nixed cardio based just on tonight, but I think that things will even themselves out. They always do.

I’ve been reflecting a lot lately on why it is that I’m pursuing a lot of things I’m going after. The degree I’m in, martial arts, my learning bass, everything, pretty much. Mostly because as my school career finally winds down (One and a half years left!) I’m beginning to try and do some cleaning so to speak of my hobbies. 

One that’s actually really high up on the "drop this" list is bodybuilding. I don’t think that I’m actually pursuing the right ends, which may explain the recent lack of motivation.  Though I still want to see my abs before 30 and avoid the health problems that plague my family’s natural tendancy to be obese, I feel that bodybuilding is the entirely wrong word for it.

What kind of brought this up is seeing the casting call for American Gladiators. Yeah, so I grew up watching it, and still try to get back from the Dojo in time to watch because I enjoy it, and like the fact that it is just as physically demanding as it has always been. I think that the idea of functioning muscle and fitness are more what I’m after than real weight loss and such. Simply put, I want to make an application for casting for Season 3.

Season 3 because in looking at the current application, the season casts in April and tapes in May, and there’s no way that between school, my work and the dojo that I’d actually be able to get ready that fast. Not to mention, I don’t presently have access to a video camera, so that puts a big stop on it right there because of a required video because I can’t make it to an open call.

So, though I still want to find a way to get a "Solid" look, I think that that will take a backseat to planning for American Gladiators. After all, by watching a whole season, I’m confident that even a Gokusai from my dojo could avoid more than a few of the things that the Gladiators toss out at people. They all move so very straight and we move so very circular. Plus, there’s no better time to apply the base concept of the monk and the bus to something.

Monk and the Bus: An American football player and a Shaolin monk are standing in front of a linebacker that is charging at them. Rather than try and take the linebacker down, the monk simply steps out of the way. The football player blocks and after the dust clears, looks like he got hit by a bus.

I’m just saying that with many of the contenders, they think just as linearly as the gladiators, and they usually get mauled by them because the gladiators are simply larger than the contenders. In theory, even against that hyper little ******* Evan that won Season 1, I should be able to just circle my way out of most of them.

 That is, saying, that I make it physically into the competition and am actually conditioned to the point where I can, well, you know, not hyperventilate mid-event. See? I’ve got work to do.

Happy Super Bowl?

*shrugs* so I blew off my diet that I had a handle on for the whole of two days between two superbowl parties. back on it tomorrow though. *nods* Totall will be, because I really enjoy it. Who knew knocking out everything liquid that wasn’t available 200 years ago would turn out to be really tasty? Milk, Tea and Water really do work out well for me. At least, until they’re not readily available. I’m still working on that whole "Soda" thing. And I will improve. In fact, I am improving! Excluding tonight, my soda consumption has dropped from about a 24 pack by volume down to about seven or so? I call that progress. Not to mention the near-instant loss of about half an inch from not having as much coursing through my system. The downside is that I haven’t had such a terrible headache as this since my senior year of high school when I was stressed about the whole college thing.

The plan for now on is to follow what I’ve done with liquids into food things. Namely, eliminating most processed food by trying to get rid of everything that would not have been available 200 years ago. So, that means if it wasn’t actually killed by a person, it’s out. It’s like some sort of freaky historical vegitarian thing. Notably, this does knock out my cheezit snackage, but I think that I can argue for them as "crackers" rather than cheeze-its. *shifty eyes*

So why 200 years? again, since that’s the rough age of my family’s martial art, it coincides with a lot of the things I’m beginning to hold up. Call it indoctrination, whatever, but a lot of the stuff isn’t too far off from what I grew up with. When I was younger, I often imagined my older self as a knight. Honorable, strong, chivalrous, and acted that way. So this isn’t really anything different for me–just a little more intense.

Granted, that does bring up some problems, namely the whole "honor" thing. One of my roomates severely insulted my martial and biological family in the same breath, and I had to walk to the other side of campus to avoid the urge to stab him on the spot. Deciding that witholding physical vengance was preferrable to jail time, I haven’t. I’ve simply treated him as socially dead (read: Silent Treatment). Childish, yes, but it’s the only thing I can do to keep myself from hearing him insult me or my families further and really giving me reason to go off on him. Notably, if this was 200 years ago, I would already have his head paraded about the village on a pike… *evil laugh* O.o;; Uh… moving on…

I suppose that this makes me seem rather… psychotic. I’m embellishing a little. Don’t worry. Really, the impulse was more like punching him in the face. With brass knuckles. And stuff. Lots of stuff. Still, I refuse to speak to him further until he apologizes.

But why? I’ve worked so hard to earn Sensei and the rest of the Uchideshi’s respect that it really hurts when anyone insults him in a non-joking manner. It feels more like an attack on me than it probably should. Same kind of goes for my biological family, but not so much. That’s more just attachment issues and protecting them.

Anyway, I’m going to continue this way until he apologizes. And the diet stuff. A little drama never hurt anyone, eh?

So, i’ve officially reached my weight goal of 185! Whoo! Except… well, I didn’t exactly gain any muscle or anything worth noting. Just a lot of fat back around my stomach. *sigh* I’m back up from 32 inches to 35. Now, here’s the catch though, I’m a whole hell of a lot healthier 185 than I was at 171. I feel better, move faster, sleep better, and have, overall, seen improvement beyond what I thought I could ever have accomplished. 

 However, this does mean something, my body fat has skyrocketed back into the mid 10%’s, and that’s not a good thing. I was down to about 10% when I was at my best about a year and a half ago. I personally tag this on stress, the move to being a little more Daoist in my every day life, and a lot less in control.

 In an effort to kick start myself back into the right direction, I am, in conjunction with my friend’s vegitarian month of February, going to go without a lot of things that I normally do have. Namely, I’m gonna get out and try to get clean. So, for February, I am going to go without or with as little of the following:

1. Soda
2. Ice Cream
3. Sugars
4. Processed Food
5. condiments
6. Fast Food
7. Chocolate
8. Did I mention soda?

Yeah, Soda has, and I believe will always be, a stumbling block of mine. In the caffeene fuled hunt for a degree, it’s hard to pull some of the later nights without it. And good old Sam’s Cola is kind of my crack, embarassingly. I like it more than Coke and all other forms of soda, but it’s pretty crappy for my body. So when it’s gone, it’s all gone. Water, and my favorite, hot tea, will be the new way for me. Oh, and milk. Methinks 1% Chocolate is kind of cutting it close, but damn, it’s good and worked once before.

Seriously, with as much into martial arts as I am, I don’t go about downing as much tea as you’d think. I like it, but only really traditional teas, none of this orange-mango-infused-yuppie crap that goes on around campus. Green Tea and Black English Tea are pretty much it for me. So I’m going to drink more, and drink it more traditionally, without sugar. 

 The deal with that is kind of because my ceremony that I was talking about in the first post is coming up in two and a half weeks. And I have to fit back into a Gi that I haven’t worn for a while for it. It’s importance has actually doubled, come to think of it. Since last update, I have been named a Family Historian for the art, and have begun to work with Sensei. Part of my initiation now reiles on my ability to work with another Uchideshi and any further proof of the family that I may have. I’m not any further, though I do suspect that there is quite a bit that can be learned from Sensei’s father’s Flight Logs. If I ever see them again though. *shrugs* It’ll be rough, but hopefully, I’ll find them again.

 In other news, parents are still bugging me about depression. I still don’t believe that I’m still depressed, especially compared to a few years ago, but they still insist that I am. Meditation when I wake up seems to work for me because I’ve discovered my goal oriented-ness. Just simply thinking of what it is that I need to do today and the progress I’ve made towards my goals is a pretty good motivator. I intend to continue this. I really intend to.