eating disorder
http://www.reutershealth.com/archive/2007/12/07/eline/links/20071207elin003.
html
Ok so i’ve gotten a lot of pms about my bout with an eating disorder! Thank you so much everyone for your support and kind words! I just thought I would fill people in on the details, and hopefully shed some light on this taboo topic. Eating disorders ARE NOT only for women. For me, it was actually a modeling recruit that started my downward spiral. I was 18, and at the time a nationally ranked golfer! I was in the mall one day at Abercrombie and Fitch when asked if I had ever considered modeling. Hell no i hadnt, i played golf everyday of my life, and when i wasn’t at the golf course i was probably eating a cheeseburger, pizza, chicken fingers, mozzerella sticks, mac n cheese, or drinking milkshakes! I wasnt fat (127lbs) but i had that skinny soft look. Anyway, she asked me to send her pictures, and to be sure to include "ab shots." Hahahahahahah ab shots? no chance i had anything resembling abs! Well i asked around to a few people how i could get a 6 pack and i received some advice to read mens health. Well i did, and i read every other thing i could get my hands on. Problem is i kept reading what NOT to eat. Well before too long it seemed as if i wasnt eating anything (a whole egg seemed like i was eating too much…one meal for me consisted of 2 rice cakes). In fact, when i went on my family vacation to the beach, i LOST 3 lbs in a week!!! Well for the better part of a year i struggled…physically, mentally, and emotionally. I lost friends, because i no longer wanted to go out for fear of being faced with having to eat something i couldnt. I didnt like myself, beacause in my mind i was never lean enough. At 120 lbs, i really was going downhill! Thank god i ended up getting a job opening up golds gym. While there i met a woman that knew i needed help. She knew that i wanted to be bigger, but also realized my constant quest for being so lean. She told me she would help me, and for some reason i let her. She put me on 4000 calories a day. Now being annorexic i was also becoming a bit OCD (which i guess is part of the disease). Every night i would write out a meal plan and then cook the food before the next day. Before i knew it i was gaining weight! The rest is history….i was able to put on about 30lbs while at home in virginia, then when i went away to college i met some great friends and training partners that pushed me to begin the physique i have today.
The point of this blog is not only to tell my story but to put out an awareness. This situation was extremely real in my life, and is real in many peoples lives today! At the end of the day, it comes down to being happy with yourself but that comes from finding balance! I wouldnt trade anything for being involved in this great industry, but that doesnt mean i dont have friends and that i diet year round. We all need to enjoy living this healthy lifestyle….eat some cheat meals, take days off from the gym…and go out and party your ass off every once in awhile!
PM me please if you feel you may be heading down the road i did, i would be more than happy to help:) Hope everyone is having a great nite!
December 16, 2007 at 9:22 am
I think it is incredibly brave of you to be so honest with yourself and with all of the people here in bodyspace.Know, that you are helping so many people here, sharing your experience.Bless you and your journey.I am glad that you had the strength to find your way to a healthy state of mind and being!:)I;m done mothering you!:)
Luvs, Rebecca
December 16, 2007 at 9:27 am
Great story! And you over came it and look great. But there is another side to the eating disorder and that is over eating. Many people think that haveing an eating disorder means your anorexic, but there are one who cant control what goes in there mouth hence the super obese. I think both types of eaters do need help, but I am glad you found the help you needed and now you look awesome.
December 16, 2007 at 5:54 pm
You Are Amazing and I’m thankful to have you helping me achieve my goals as well
I’m glad that you wrote about it..because some people don’t understand how something so simple as food can control or run your life. Been there done that and came out of it and i’m an eating machine now
..good food though:)
A+ Post:)
December 16, 2007 at 9:19 pm
Thank you for sharing your story! It is good to remember that EDs do affect guys. You have done an excellent job - both athletically and mentally.
December 17, 2007 at 9:29 am
It takes a lot of guts to admit your weaknesses. But it’s great that you want to help others. I can’t say that I know what you went through, but I used to have the same MENTALITY, and the BINGEEATING behaviour. And yeah, it’s hard to get rid of, and sometimes I think that a ’sport’ like this only makes it worse, but actually this last year has been the biggest turning point for me, and my mentality ‘battle’ has pretty much GONE!! Which is so freeing. But keep it up, man. You will be a source of inspiration for many people out there. And who better to help those than those who’ve been through it themselves!
December 18, 2007 at 7:15 am
Hey sweetie,
I love this blog of yours. I’ve had an ED since I was 18 yrs old and it was only till last year that i REALLY decided to get better. I went to borders and saw all these fitness mags, beautiful tone women on them and wanted to be healthy too. So started at the gym and started eating the right way!!! Its still a struggle sometimes but "mind over matter"….I’m in a way better mind frame than I was some years ago…THANKS FOR SHARING YOUR STORY,XoXo
December 18, 2007 at 12:58 pm
Jason, great blog bro, truly a success story way to make a come back. You have great character to share that story. I’m sure there are so many people who are just inspired by your photo’s and never would realize that such things do go on. Theres definitely more to the man than muscle. I’m sure you’ve inspired many by what you’ve done. Takes balls man to admit something like that. Good on ya.
December 21, 2007 at 5:41 am
Your honesty and humility honors you, and I sincerely hope you can help people struggling with it.
December 22, 2007 at 7:18 am
Wow Jason. I had a major eating disorder, too - night eating. It’s a stress disorder. But I didn’t want to admit it (since we’re trainers we don’t have eating disorders right?!) so I hid behind other things. "I’m grouchy," etc. I even told people I was bipolar and that’s why I was so moody. Anything but admit I had a MAJOR eating disorder that was eating away at me. I left DC / VA for Texas hoping to deal with it here, but it just got worse. Finally (recently) I bottomed out. And guess what I found out? It’s not my fault, lots of people have it, and there is medication. (I was really anti-medication because I have always had a negative view of the pharmaceutical industry). And guess what? I finally started the medication and got with a psychiatrist and… ta da! I’m not night eating anymore. How much easier would life be for people if this stuff wasn’t so taboo?! Heck I might still be in Virginia!!
December 24, 2007 at 10:05 am
Thanks for you honesty. to tell the truth, i thought i was one of the few men on this site that had that problem. All of you look so healthy and happy- but then again, that is what my friends told me too, right before i told them the truth. You are right that most people think that it is only a woman problem, but it can happen to anyone that worries about how they look. I, too, had modelled once and the guys i modelled with all had abs, but were really skinny. I was 205 at the time and pretty lean (now that i think about it), but at that time, i thought i was fat, and hence i was lead down that dark path. i still sometimes battle with it, but not as much as before- mostly in the summer and spring. Once again, thanks for opening up great conversations.
December 31, 2007 at 4:21 pm
I have struggled with my weight since I was a child. When I was younger I would eat on 3 occasions. First because it was "time" to eat. Second because there was food available I did not want to miss out on. Third, just because I felt hungry. The problem was, I would always eat a meal. I would go to a restaurant and order a value meal because I was hungry and then an hour or so later it was time for lunch so I would go get another value meal. When I finally reached the 320 lbs mark I had had it. I literally went on a diet of hydroxycut and water. I may have allowed myself a small bowl of oatmeal or a 6" sub a day if I was lucky. I think the longest I ever went on just the water and hydroxycut was 5 or 6 days. Yeah, I lost a bunch of weight fast. I got down to 228 lbs. But once I started eating again I went back up to 270 lbs. It was hell on my body and I was cranky and lost friends because of my attitude. I can definitely relate to your post. I’ve never actually told anyone this before. Wow. It really is kind of a relief to actually call it for what it is. Thanks.
December 31, 2007 at 8:11 pm
kudos! so glad you overcame this, there needs to be more of a light shone on the guys out there who suffer from eating disorders too!
January 1, 2008 at 9:13 am
I applaud you for posting this. I think most would rather not admit such a problem let alone announce it to the world (I know it was hard for me). It brings great awareness to men and women.
January 2, 2008 at 7:02 pm
Jason,
Great insight! We all have battles with diffrent things…. OCD , Agoriphopia, or eating disorders…. the mind is a pwerful thing! I feel we must bridal our minds if we ever plan on bridaling our bodies!
January 4, 2008 at 9:45 am
that’s powerful, thank you for your honesty. I’m sure you have helped someone by helping expose a very relevant subject, kudos and good luck.
January 4, 2008 at 9:52 am
thanks for sharing your story. best of luck to you in your journey.
January 6, 2008 at 8:22 pm
Wow, thanks for such a personal disclosure. You look awesome! Thank God u started working at Golds! What ever happened w/ that modeling gig, did u get the job?
January 8, 2008 at 12:29 pm
Excellent reminder of how easy it is to get carried away and lose sight of what is really important. Thank you!
January 15, 2008 at 5:50 pm
I agree with the others… your honestly and courage are not common, but I admire the fact that you have enough of both to post this! Congrats. Keep on doin what you’re doin. You look great:)
January 15, 2008 at 5:58 pm
Kudos brother for the best blog I have read to date. I have a problem with B+P up to this day but rather infrequently than when it first started a few years ago. Before it was a daily thing. Keep up the good work and know your story helps. Vinny
January 25, 2008 at 5:16 am
Thanks for ur response. I do have a friend that lives in DC an when I visit her I will look u up for a training session. I know about OCD too. I grew up with my mother who has it. It can sometimes put a strain on relationships. I moved out as soon as I was 18 I didn’t like the argueing but I love her ya know. Good luck with your competion goal. I bet you will do great!!!!
February 27, 2008 at 2:01 pm
Thank you so much for this blog! I am brand new (like yesterday new) after I decided I wanted muscle. I am a 16 yr. old male who also suffered from an eating disorder. Feel free to visit my profile. ITs pretty bad both asthetically and technically but if you would ever like to talk, I think that would be nice.
http://bodyspace.bodybuilding.com/MSQ3881/
-Mike
March 9, 2008 at 9:20 pm
I really enjoyed your story. It was very captivating. Good post. It is good how you were able to overcome an eating disorder and acheive the amazing physique that you have today. Good job!
October 30, 2008 at 10:24 am
Yo dude, i love ur story. I use to do what u use too do such as, eatting alot but i started to cut down which was bad since i wanted to grow muscles. I calculated the average of calories i consume everyday and that was aprox. 1045 and that’s very less. I wanted to stay lean and stil grow muscles at the sametime but nothing seems to be working. Also i weigh 140lbs and I was also thinking about using creatine but not sure if i need that. I was wondering if u can give me some helpful advice to grow muscles and still stay lean. Thanks