I shouldn’t feel compelled to respond to this…
… but I’m going to, anyway. For the person who messaged me and asked me why my chest was so much smaller in one of my earlier pics than the one I took yesterday: That picture was taken after I lost a WHOLE bunch of weight - I went down from 145 to about 105, and went from a very hefty chest size to what you see in that picture. I gained back some weight, and when I did, it went immediately to my chest. So there.
LOL.
In the last few weeks, I’ve been trying to make an effort to be more friendly to people around me. It’s quite an effort for me as my natural impulse is to stay to myself and mind my own business. But in the beginning of this month, I decided to talk to at least one new person, each day, and do my best to make some small talk. I’m NOT good at this. But I’m starting to meet a lot of really cool people, and I’m slowly building my courage. When you walk into my gym, you have to pass all of the memebership advisors, and they’re all men, young and friendly. For some reason, I always avoid eye contact when I pass through this hall. I pretend to put my keys away, or start reaching for my shaker bottle… anything to avoid making eye contact. I always do this when there are men that stare at me.
That must sound stuck up, right? I’m not saying every guy is attracted to me… but when there are, their stares make me incredibly uncomfortable. I guess much of this has to do with how insecure I am and how I am really lacking in the self-esteem department.
The next time this happens, my goal will be to make eye contact right back and give them a smile. 
And just for Awwwwwww’s sake, here is my beautiful puppy. My little angel…
February 29, 2008 at 2:55 pm
You should not be insecure you are very pretty and have worked hard to achieve your goals. Hold your head high they should be scared to make eye contact with you. IS your little puppies name Angel?
February 29, 2008 at 3:07 pm
I have the same experience too. In the past I also just try and avoid eye contact, but lately I’ve been trying to be more outgoing and if I make eye contact I just smile. I’ve had no problems or misunderstandings so far so I think it works. By the way your puppy is adorable!
February 29, 2008 at 3:13 pm
Jack russel right? Is he a cross with anything? Those pups are VERY smart if you work with them a lot. I have a little guy too who is a total goofball.
As for the eye contact, I have the same problem. I am by no means very good looking but when my wife and I go places, she gets frustrated because I get checked out very blatantly (the girls most of the time turn around and smile and stuff too after walking by) and he gets angry. I don’t make eye contact a lot, but if someone is just looking I’ll make contact and smile just to acknowledge I see them.
In my new apartment complex I made friends with the dog people just because we have something in common.
Also I think I have good people skills. I can read them well. So if I talk to them it’s because I can sense they are not weird and what not. If you have a hard time with that then yes meeting people can be uncomfortable.
February 29, 2008 at 3:14 pm
I don’t think it’s so much insecurity as it makes you uncomfortable because there’s a difference between glancing and staring. Someone staring will make anyone uncomfortable. Go at your own pace but I know what you mean. It took me almost a year to be comfortable talking to people at the gym.
February 29, 2008 at 3:20 pm
Yeah you should just take pride in the fact that your attractive and just walk by smiling. They can’t make you do anything. I garuntee they wouldn’t be staring at you if you weren’t something good to look at. Be confident hold your head up high you don’t have to pretend to do anything for nobody and kudos to you for being the one to engage someone new in conversation it will lead to more self and social confidence never be afraid to be yourself. I’m an ******* from afar but get to know me and im a very loyal friend who doesn’t hand out any bullshit to anyone. But i stick true to myself and I only have 3 close friends, My wife, my lifting partner Jeremy and Ngoni
February 29, 2008 at 7:31 pm
You are a friendly person, and I for one am very grateful for it. Don’t hold back that wonderful personality from the world; it would be a loss. Your new white top is fantastic and you are looking gorgeous.
February 29, 2008 at 8:07 pm
It comes quite natural for females to lower their eyes in the presence of men…especially a large group of them. But if you are aware of it and want to change it, by all means do so. For me it depends on how socially open I am feeling that particular day. Gyms are a good example of "polite ignoring". If we acknowledge everyone we see, it can eventually get in the way of a good workout. I used to not understand this concept when I was younger and got my feelings hurt all the time out in stores, etc, when people didn’t return smiles. I think it was part of growing up. When you are young, everybody smiles at you.
March 1, 2008 at 11:45 am
I don’t think it makes you seem stuck up. Some people are naturally outgoing and some people like to keep to themselves. When I’m around people I know you can’t shut me up but I’m quite reserved around strangers.
March 1, 2008 at 4:22 pm
It’s a confidence thing -don’t feel like it’s good or bad. I’ve found that making eye contact with everyone is oft more intimidating than not making eye contact. You’re gorgeous, you work hard, and when you’re feeling good it shows.
March 1, 2008 at 4:26 pm
I do the exact same thing… I call it "doing the geisha", but mostly when it’s guys that I think are hot.
It’s hard to overcome, but 8 times out of 10, if you just try to look up and give a friendly smile, they’ll do the same. It helps to build up those friendships, especially when creepy creepertons try to get the mack down on you… they have a great way of making them go away. 
CUTEST puppy ever!!
March 1, 2008 at 9:09 pm
Oh my gosh, what a cute….er…puppy - I swear that I wasn’t staring. I stare, I mean I swear!! I’m impressed that you’re making an effort - eye contact comes tough for me, and when I catch a look at myself in the mirror at the gym, I look so mean. I’m kind of surprised anyone would stare, because your "prettiness" is kind of intimidating.
March 2, 2008 at 7:08 am
Cute puppy!!
You might be surprised if you did make eye contact and say hi, they may end up too tongue tied to even say much back!!!
March 2, 2008 at 5:01 pm
I think your eye contact, and small talk goals are huge. You’ll be surprised how many of the guys at the gym you are intimidating by your beauty. Just try to be yourself and let others get to know the you that is you. I think you’ll find your gym will become a more inviting place, it’s too bad not everyone on this site uses their best manners or judgement. Good luck pursuing your goals.
March 2, 2008 at 8:05 pm
You are a beutifull women Janet,Thats why the stare, and they also probaly wish they had the nerve to ask you out. Hold your head high look them (or anyone) in the eyes. YOu have no reason to hold your head down. Truth be known when you look people in the eyes they are less likly to take advantage of you.
March 2, 2008 at 8:38 pm
OMG I do the same thing. When I pass people I root through my purse looking for the all important nothing. I pull my cellphone out not intending to make a call!
I have also said hello to people in passing (when I am walking my dog). I don’t mind saying hello, I get nervous when the conversation becomes longer.
I also don’t mind looking at people but when they look back I look away. When I have longer conversations with people I tend to look past them, off to the side. So I am kind of looking at them but not directly.
I have been thought of as "stuck up" by many people because I am not an "in your face" person. I am the quiet person in the corner of the room just watching all of the conversation going on.