In_Flight’s BodyBlog

So its work at the front desk but still im pumped. I hope everything goes well. It would be nice to work in an active enviroment, I really need more activity in the life. It would also help with my massage practice as well i think because to be honest im kinda of a hermiot unless i have to get out and meet people then i usually do really well.

I am really excited about my body. I am getting alot leaner, my abs are really starting to pop and my arms are comming along nicely. I have a problem area around the upper thigh, as most women do but i honestly hate training my lower body unless im really in the mood so ive been doing alot of walking, which is going okay. I htink im going to start doing one lower body exercise every night because i think alot of my problem is that my knees and hamstrings get so sore so quickly.

PS- thanks for all the support on my last blog, it was really a pick me up to feel appriciated!!

Take care

Ive been working hard at not being negitive. I give myself one great things to do each day and if i do it then the day is successful. Something that was getting me down was definatly how I am the only one who cleans, cooks etc around the hosue. my guy does nothing and if he does cook he cooks for himself thats it. Then about a wekk ago i realized that im being stupid. I cannot make him do it and obviously explaining how it makes me feel doesnt help, and besides i like doing it, now i just make sure nothing is left for tomorrow so i dont wke up to a mess as i used to.

Im still struggling with not being a proiority in my relationship ,with my shyness, and the expectations people have for me. Im trying harder to live my life for me and no one else.

As far as training, i have to say im looking the best i have in a while. My  diet is looking up. Im still struggling a bit but again its better than its been in a long time

Im going home for the weekend. which is always bittersweet. Alot of my bad negitive behaviors started there of course and i always find by the end of the trip im overwhelmed with anxiety about family, friends and my relationship. I carry this along with me in all aspects of my life though. Yes i see the benifit in dealing with the bad but when thats all you see then there is a problem.

I do NOT have to dwell on negitivity in my life. I either can’t change what is upsetting me or I am choosing to be part of it, either way it is there and my dwelling will not change a thing. So over this weekend I will try my hardest to refocus everytime i feel bad

ALSO….home means drinks, junk and laziness lol. so ive decided wine for drinks, but only take what i want and salmon for the bbq’s. And im taking the dog home so i def will get to walk. well see how it goes

Today I ran/walked for 30 minutes, then I walked for about 60 minutes, I had a nice little workout, I tanned, I ate really good (exept a bit of ice cream after supper) and My day for tomrorow is already planned out. All I can think about though is the stupid ice cream, the dishes im doing which im the ONLY one who ever does, the mess my house is in b/c my guy stayed home from work today and how I should be at the gym right now. My point….I focus on the negitive in my life…im not happy. I find myself unhappy alot….but these day im more unhappy then i am happy.

About 18 months ago I was in really good shape..and i still am (just not as strick) but now all i think about is what i do wrong and then all i thought about was how in control i was. My life is fine, im in good shape and have the potential to take it farther. Thats awesome. so why do i focus on all the bad? I donno!

I spend at least 1 hour a day either thinking, writing, reading or talking about how to improve my life. what would make me happier, then it seems like that where it stops. Does it stop b/c my guy is home from work and i fall back into my routine? does it stop b/c i like to have something to work towards?? i dono but I hate it.

So my commitment to myself is that a few times a week i will come on here and write about me. I will focus on one thing that makes me unhappy, talk about why it makes me unhappy, what control i have over it and how i can change it. Hopefully this will open my eyes and get me going again, focusing on ME ME ME.

 Thanks for reading this blog and feel free to read the others as they come. I dont expect answers to my problems, you dont even have to respond, but if you feel like reading maybe you’ll learn a thing or two too

All my bb.com friends…xo

bb.com & oxyegn! THEY ARE MY HEROES.

Sometimes I get so confused and angry. Its hard living with a person who is not strick and doesn’t follow through with things! My guy will take time to try to fix good lunches, eats rediculous amounts of food trying to get proper protien, worksout for almost 2 hours a day and then comes home and buys chips or nachos or ice cream. I admit I get my cravings as does anyone and my big time is at night when there is a definate no no but I try to keep away from it. Doesn’t it make it so much easier when the person you are with holds you accountable?? YES! Sometimes he’ll say "oh you know you dont want that" but rarly ever, instead he goes and gets the food or will talk about it to me enough untill i say yes. It’s frusterating b/c i have no willpower but i say no, i even rudley point out that he’s never gonna lose weight if he keeps it up, that what is the sence in being so good all day when you ruin at night with 100’s of empty calories?? but he just keeps at it! and then i follow. I know im only accountable to myself but its hard when night is a couples time and instead of cuddling or watching a movie he eats and I watch untill i reach over for some. I just wish I had the support that i give him!

But then I wake up and go on here and start a day off feeling good, and sometimes at night I will read my oxygen (that keeps me from the junk). The point is I dont need to be ripped, i dont need to compete, I never even have to turn heads but i wanna be healthy and live a good life…it feels SOOOO GOOD when i do, its just hard without support

well more than a week ago now i got punched in the face. two black eyes, a sweeled up face and a blood stained eye ball. Its a long story but the mral is i was not fighting…but thats obviously what it looks like. So im embarrassesed. The swelling has mainly gone down, the stitches are out but i still have a bit of a black eye and the eye ball is still bloody. I havent gone to the gym or hardly out in public. being a new RMT i am trying to get my name out there, but i dont want people to see me like this and get the wrong idea.

My training has all been from home for this last week or so but im still hitting it hard. Im not lifting as much but i get to do workous i used to do and have more fun with it. Really im not minding it. I have noticed this last little which though that the booty has a bit more cushion :O and my arms are looking thinnner and not very curvy. I am a bit upset but im still striving for my july 1st goal

I won the battle with the bed this morning. up and outt bed by 5am, at the gym by 6am. I did bis, tris and abs today along with a 20 min cardio warm up.

Id be lying if i said it was easy, im really tired right now, might even have a little nap before work but I did it and im proud of myself. So for the rest of the day i have a 40 minute walk planned and at least 2 more 30 minute walks with my dog. im also  going to do a bit of forearm work later on this afternoon. i havent got a supper planned out yet but ill pick smething good

I can give all the silly reasons why i havent been working out hard n e more but really it all comes down to me getting in my own way. i let my low self esteem keep me back far too often. Ive gained a little weight, nothing much jiust like 2 or 3 pounds, ive lost a bit of muscle mass and ive definatly lacked in motivation. So i need a reason to get back on it b/c doing it for me just isnt cutting it any more.

So in 6 weeks it is my boyfriend’s b-day. Usually we go down to the lake, spend a day in our bikinis, bbq, beer and dancing. im sure this year will be no different. Luke works hard at himself. he’s got alot of muscle and he’s lost some weight lately. The gym consumes him, so much that it sometimes causes problems b/w us. So i figure he can be my motivation. I want him to feel like a king, he’s looking good, ill look good. I want to make him proud.

 Ill fill you in on the diet and training as i go! Just finished my measurments today and took some before pics i’ll post later on. WISh ME LUCK!

how do you di it? …The best wya to start a day is up early and get a healthy day started with a run,workot, good breakfast! Not so long ago i loved doing this. Now I feel really icky and I never get a chance to go to the gym in the evenings becase i get so busy. So my question is what are your tactics? How do i get my butt outta bed in the morning?!

So crazy cat lady has nothing on this crazy dog lady lol. I didnt know i was like this lol its abit pathetic. I dont do ne thing without the dog and when i do i miss him. he’s the biggestest sweety ever!

With an upcomming new job comes a move so right now my landlord is showing off my apartment, one lady that shows it off doesnt want the odg here when they come so i have to take him out for a walk. They give me only about 5 minutes njotice before they come so that means I always have to be with the dog, menaing no gym for me untill luke comes home. When he does come hme though i usually dont want to go so ive started working out in my home again, …..with my dog!

It takes awhile to figure out when he will not bother me with lol but we got it down to a science almost now lol. Hes just a pup so sitting there watching me workout is a no no, he wants to get in there! So im training him to get away from my feet, not get too excited and to play with me. Basically hes either on leash and running or walking or has a bone and we play fetch or a toy and we play tug. Some examples and tugging while  doing suats, its easy b/c i tugging up and down as i squat, or one i like is doing knealing kickbacks and with the opposit arm as the leg i am working i tug with him, this engages my core as well. Or ill do a set of something and throw his bone, he fetches and i throw again after my next set. Its all really fun and still really easy to concentrate on the working muscles. Its good to be able to workout and not ignore him. Hes quite the dogggie