~Heather’s World~

In a rut…
I am so truly stuck in a rut! I’m just in limbo. I’m searching for this happy medium and looking for this fire but I have yet to find it or just rediscover it.
Right now I am struggling with managing my time and prioritizing. Since I moved, I feel like I have to stop and make time for my family, because I don’t just see them in passing-my mom particularly.
I mean, hell I work 10hr days, Monday through Friday. By the time I get to the gym and finish up its between 7-7.30 and frankly I’m tired. If I want to visit, I have to cut that short and go see my family. I would like to get up and do my cardio in the am, but I just haven’t beeen able to let the bed go in the morning.
This week I planned to be in the gym 5-6 days, that has NOT happened. I have been there once. Yesterday my mom came over for dinner and coffee, then I havd a friend over later in the evening and he left rather late. So I am pretty tired today. Tonight, I have to go pick up my pc from my parents house, then go get the monitor from my girlfriend, then tomorrow I have to go and get my refund on my furniture delivery-which is a whole different  issue. Then Friday, after work off to the store to purchase my desk and then I have to have a friend of mine come by and put it together, then sat 9am dr. appt. and 12-4 I’m in limbo waiting for the furniute store and Comcast.
I’m tired and beat. It’s cold, gloomy and I have lost all motivation. I don’t even want to go to the gym in the evening because its pitch black, dark and gloomy! I don’t know what to do.
My eating has been okay.  I’m just so bored w/ chicken, chicken, and chicken…and I’m like, wtf! I mean, it’s just getting rough for me! I made all my food this week. I’m trying to cycle carbs and I’m just like, blah…but I know it  yields results. I feel sleepy and tired, but I’m taking my vitamins.
Any advice, words of encouragement, anything at this point would help me.
My dad even bought me the p90x & thes top notch resistance bands (I have the bands from 2lbs up to 85lbs) to help me stay on track….
 

Any words of advice???

has anyone ever tried the velocity diet and if so, what type of results did you get. did you like it what do you think about it. please advise.

lol

has anyone ever tried the velocity diet and if so, what type of results did you get. did you like it what do you think about it. please advise.

lol

has anyone ever tried the velocity diet and if so, what type of results did you get. did you like it what do you think about it. please advise.

lol

has anyone ever tried the velocity diet and if so, what type of results did you get. did you like it what do you think about it. please advise.

lol

has anyone ever tried the velocity diet and if so, what type of results did you get. did you like it what do you think about it. please advise.

lol

Earlier this week, I asked everyone-How do you get your fire back? How do you get your mojo back? Well, I’ve have come to a few conclusions. Let’s rewind first though, shall we? 

I have been out of the gym for roughly a month and even when I did go my workouts weren’t half as focused as they use to be. My eating has been terrible this past month as well. I will be honest and say that part of it is just due to being lazy and plain old tired of chicken, tuna, etc. Also, I might add that this month has been completely nuts for me. I was apartment searching, checking the apartments out, shopping for stuff I needed. I just put all my energy and focus into finding and apartment that would suit me! 

Now, that the apartment search is over as well as the move-I’m left with a lot of regrets! Regrets on how crappy I look now! I wish a 1000 times I would’ve just went to the gym 3 days a week and ate half decent! But I didn’t. I realize that for every action, there will most definitely be a reaction! You will deal w/ the consequences of all the choices you make! I chose NOT to workout, cook, and eat healthy! Now, the consequence is that I’ve lost muscle, definition, strength and stamina. Let’s not mention I’ve gained about 5-8lbs. Yeah. I’m not pleased. 

I went to the gym yesterday to do a leg workout and I was so sore that I could barely finish my whole workout. I was so disgusted. I wore my new coat yesterday that fit perfect when I purchased it, however it was snug! Red lights! I was NOT happy w/ this! 

I have to admit, this month I lost my fire. I was just so focused on moving and getting out on my own that I kicked everything to the side. I was working out yesterday, doing dead lifts. I was previously able to dead lift over 100lbs, I was only about to use 40lbs yesterday. I was disgusted, like-are you kidding me? Despite being disgusted and hurt, I kept going and finished each set. I know that I did the best that I could last night and that was good enough for me. 

I got home and started thinking, bull sh*t-that was NOT good enough, you can do better then that! You’re no newbie! You may be down, but you are NEVER out! Apartment searching and moving was a process and I realize that getting back 100% committed will be a process as well, but I know that I can do it, because I have done it before! 

You see, I had to be at home, alone, quiet in order to find my fire. What set me on fire was NOT being able to do what I use to do. At this point is not even totally based on how I look or feel about my exterior! I’m more pissed because I have lost so much strength and that made me mad! I felt weak and I hate feeling weak! 

You see, it’s a new ball game now, because I am on my own. I have my own space, away from my family, friends, everyone! I am truly on my own! I no longer have to worry about mom baking or bringing home junk. I don’t have to worry about my dad w/ his candy addiction. I am in my own home! I cook my own food w/ the things I like to cook w/! There is NO junk in my house! No sweets other then s.f. jello and s.f. pudding, but I don’t even have milk to make the pudding! Lol! 

I am no longer stressed out, waking up in the middle of the night to eat and binge. I believe that living under my parents, my dad specifically, had truly taken a toll on me mentally. I am much, much, better now. 

So, instead of looking at this month long hiatus as a set back, I look at it as a set up. Set up for what you ask.. a set up to get my ass in gear, to get better mentally, physically, and emotionally! This is MY chance to shine! I no longer feel obligated to rush home to chat w/ mom, because I go home to an empty house. I no longer feel obliged to taste her treats, because they are NOT around! I feel a sense of pride and emotional freedom! I also feel a sense of mental strength, because I did this whole move alone. I have carried everything alone for quite sometime and it has finally paid off. 

Now, it’s time for me to take that fire that pushed me to move and allow it to push me into the gym. 

It’s back to carb cycling, hitting the gym 6 days a week, and eating clean! My dad also bought me Power90x and a great resistance band collection for the really cold days I don’t want to drive to the gym. He said, here-since you won’t be here to use what I have, take these. And he handed me the stuff! I was happy. My resistance bands are top notch and go up to like 80lbs! they have all the attachments so I can do everything that I would in a gym! 

So, my kitchen is stocked w/ clean items and this week was basically trial and error, but next week it’s back to the basics! Sunday will be my cook day to cook up my food for the week! I can do this, it’s just a process, but I think I found my fire to do what I use to do, but do it better. 

Earlier this week, I asked everyone-How do you get your fire back? How do you get your mojo back? Well, I’ve have come to a few conclusions. Let’s rewind first though, shall we? 

I have been out of the gym for roughly a month and even when I did go my workouts weren’t half as focused as they use to be. My eating has been terrible this past month as well. I will be honest and say that part of it is just due to being lazy and plain old tired of chicken, tuna, etc. Also, I might add that this month has been completely nuts for me. I was apartment searching, checking the apartments out, shopping for stuff I needed. I just put all my energy and focus into finding and apartment that would suit me! 

Now, that the apartment search is over as well as the move-I’m left with a lot of regrets! Regrets on how crappy I look now! I wish a 1000 times I would’ve just went to the gym 3 days a week and ate half decent! But I didn’t. I realize that for every action, there will most definitely be a reaction! You will deal w/ the consequences of all the choices you make! I chose NOT to workout, cook, and eat healthy! Now, the consequence is that I’ve lost muscle, definition, strength and stamina. Let’s not mention I’ve gained about 5-8lbs. Yeah. I’m not pleased. 

I went to the gym yesterday to do a leg workout and I was so sore that I could barely finish my whole workout. I was so disgusted. I wore my new coat yesterday that fit perfect when I purchased it, however it was snug! Red lights! I was NOT happy w/ this! 

I have to admit, this month I lost my fire. I was just so focused on moving and getting out on my own that I kicked everything to the side. I was working out yesterday, doing dead lifts. I was previously able to dead lift over 100lbs, I was only about to use 40lbs yesterday. I was disgusted, like-are you kidding me? Despite being disgusted and hurt, I kept going and finished each set. I know that I did the best that I could last night and that was good enough for me. 

I got home and started thinking, bull sh*t-that was NOT good enough, you can do better then that! You’re no newbie! You may be down, but you are NEVER out! Apartment searching and moving was a process and I realize that getting back 100% committed will be a process as well, but I know that I can do it, because I have done it before! 

You see, I had to be at home, alone, quiet in order to find my fire. What set me on fire was NOT being able to do what I use to do. At this point is not even totally based on how I look or feel about my exterior! I’m more pissed because I have lost so much strength and that made me mad! I felt weak and I hate feeling weak! 

You see, it’s a new ball game now, because I am on my own. I have my own space, away from my family, friends, everyone! I am truly on my own! I no longer have to worry about mom baking or bringing home junk. I don’t have to worry about my dad w/ his candy addiction. I am in my own home! I cook my own food w/ the things I like to cook w/! There is NO junk in my house! No sweets other then s.f. jello and s.f. pudding, but I don’t even have milk to make the pudding! Lol! 

I am no longer stressed out, waking up in the middle of the night to eat and binge. I believe that living under my parents, my dad specifically, had truly taken a toll on me mentally. I am much, much, better now. 

So, instead of looking at this month long hiatus as a set back, I look at it as a set up. Set up for what you ask.. a set up to get my ass in gear, to get better mentally, physically, and emotionally! This is MY chance to shine! I no longer feel obligated to rush home to chat w/ mom, because I go home to an empty house. I no longer feel obliged to taste her treats, because they are NOT around! I feel a sense of pride and emotional freedom! I also feel a sense of mental strength, because I did this whole move alone. I have carried everything alone for quite sometime and it has finally paid off. 

Now, it’s time for me to take that fire that pushed me to move and allow it to push me into the gym. 

It’s back to carb cycling, hitting the gym 6 days a week, and eating clean! My dad also bought me Power90x and a great resistance band collection for the really cold days I don’t want to drive to the gym. He said, here-since you won’t be here to use what I have, take these. And he handed me the stuff! I was happy. My resistance bands are top notch and go up to like 80lbs! they have all the attachments so I can do everything that I would in a gym! 

So, my kitchen is stocked w/ clean items and this week was basically trial and error, but next week it’s back to the basics! Sunday will be my cook day to cook up my food for the week! I can do this, it’s just a process, but I think I found my fire to do what I use to do, but do it better. 

How do you get your mojo back?? As many of you all know, I was going through a lot of changes w/in my life. Some of the changes were good and some were not so good. However, at the end of it all I am thankful. This past weekend I finally moved out and into my own apartment. I’m not living w/ anyone except me, myself and I. It’s very exciting, yet scary. For the past few nights I have not been able to sleep well. Finally, last night I had a good night sleep! In the mix of all the moving, apartment searching, and everything else-I lost my mojo and my motivation to go to the gym and eat remotely healthy. So, Monday I went to the gym, had a great workout, but Tuesday it went down the drain. I was so tired that I didn’t go to the gym and my eating was terrible. I ate so much candy. I think I ate a lot of candy, because I was tired and it caused me to crave the sugar. I’m not quite sure. I feel like I can’t get back into the swing of my eating clean and exercise daily. I want to, but I don’t have that fire like I use to! Hell, when I got to the gym, everyone was like, welcome back! That’s so bad! Lol! So, I guess my question is how-how do you get your fire back..you’re mojo..how do I make myself want to eat right and NOT binge on candy. I know it won’t go back over night-but in due time, it can go back and I can suceed. I look at old pics and I keep telling myself, if you did it once, you can do it again and it can be even better this time around because you live alone, you control the food that is in your home! No one else does! So, let me know..how do you get your mojo back! How do you get that fire back!