~Heather’s World~

Competition #1

A lot of people have been telling me that I have the potential to compete, to actually grace the stage and crowd with all of my hotness. (lol)

I so beg to differ. When I stand head on in the mirror, I say, sh*t, you have so, so , so, far to go. I constantly beat myself up, never ever being satisfied.

I actually went as far as looking into OCB competition in my area. To compete or not to compete is the question. Oh, the pressure..that’s all I can think about. Every time I put crap in my mouth, I think, if you were competing, you would’ve just taken 10 huuuge steps backwards.

My 1^st competition will be with myself. So far, I think I have done pretty damn good. I’ve made a lot of progress since April, Mentally and physically. I remember a time where I was panting, just from walking @3.5 mph. I remember jumping rope for all of 30 seconds and thinking, are you freaking kidding me! Scratch this! I recall 10lbs feeling as heavy as 1000lbs. Lunges…excuse me…what are those?! I did them, but I b*tched more and more w/ every step, because I could barely keep my balance, maybe it’s because I had to always have a large cup of coffee with extra cream and sugar. Lol. The end result after these few short months is this:

I can do 100 lunges and keep my balance! Jump rope? I can jump rope for an hour, sprint at 6mph, jog at 5-5.5mph, chest press 50lbs, curl 20lbs (25lbs if I have someone to spot me), and I can shoulder press 40lbs. I no longer use sugar in my coffee, hell I’m proud to say I drink my coffee black w/ splenda. I feel so much better about myself & I’m so proud of all that I have accomplished-thus far.

I get so much attention at the gym. People submerge me w/ compliments, smiles, and happy hellos. Hell I was told I have a fan club! Are you kidding me?! Lol. I went to Walgreens on Saturday after I worked out and this guy walked by me (I could tell he was checking me out), and walked back and was like, damn, do you workout? I looked and kind of smiled, I said, Yes, I do. Why. He was like, OMG! Look at your delts and arms. I think you have more muscle then me. I was like, like.., Oh, Okay. Lol. (I flex everywhere I go. Especially my shoulders. Lol. So I think he saw me kinda flexing and stretching.) Then before I left Walgreens, I had to get a few bags of ice, 4 to be exact. Well, I didn’t have a cart, so I held the freezer door open w/ my leg and stacked the bags of ice in my right arm. I guess, being a lady, I’m supposed to be weak, because another guy walked by and took a double take! Lol! I started laughing, because I know he was surprised this damsel could carry her own damn ice in 1 arm! Ha!

These are just a few of the accomplishments that I have made in about 5 months (remember I really started to get serious in April of this year). But, a few questions remain,

1. Can I kick the sweet tooth like the extra cream and sugar?
2. Can I stop my occasional binges?
3. Can I become stronger and more defined?
4. Can I be really, really, lean-like I have always dreamed about?
5. Can I compete with myself, everyday?
6. Can I beat where I am currently?
7. Can I compete? Will I ever be able to walk on a stage and compete with other like minded women?

Part of me says yes and part of me says, no leave well enough alone, just be happy with where you are right now.

But a tiny, unusually quiet voice says, Yes, YOU CAN! YOU CAN COMPETE WITH YOURSELF 1^ST AND OTHERS SECOND.  YOU CAN BE BETTER, BUT YOU HAVE TO WANT IT AND STAY FOCUSED!!

So, my first competition will NOT be w/ other people. It starts with me, myself, and I. Everyday, every workout, every meal-it’s beating myself from where I am now to where I want to be. Once I fine tune myself, THEN and ONLY then will I go on a stage.

My main goal is the clean eating thing, which means, it’s back to logging every morsel I put into my mouth. It keeps me honest and accountable! It means, no more cool whip or reddi whip on Jell-O or in coffee, because I abuse it! I already know I do. Lol. So, instead of lying to myself saying I don’t use that much, KNOWING GOOD AND DAMN WELL, I EAT TO MUCH OF IT-I WILL GET RID OF IT! It’s not even that serious. I’ll be okay, no one ever died from a lack of cool whip or reddiwhip! J I just need to pull the sweet tooth out! That’s all. I want to put a little more ump into my cardio workouts, keep it varied, but give 110% every time.

I want to fine tune Heather into truly becoming HotHeather and 1 day, next year-walking across stage. As of right now, my biggest goal for next year is to do 1 competetion, but for right now, it’s fine tuning everything that I possibly can w/in myself.

You see, I have graduated. I’m no longer the same person that I was in April when I walked back into the gym, I’m a different person.  It’s time to move up, GET MY PH.D! LOL J

I am recommitting myself to the game, again. Yes, I know everyday will not be a good day, but I can focus on having more good days then bad. I can grow each day and learn from each and every mistake.

One thing goes without saying, bodyspace has helped me soooo much. It’s truly been a staple in my life. I get so, so, much love from everyone one here! It builds me up and keeps me motivated! Every person that I have spoke to has helped me in some way, shape or form!!

I have to say this Phil Valenti has been AWESOME! In my heart, I know his workouts are what have my shoulders to where they are! His workouts kick my ass, everyday! His diet is hard though! Lol It is NOT for the faint at heart, trust me! I am working on it though, (I really am!!) I want him to be able to look at me months from now and say, wow! She did it! I didn’t kick her ass, she kicked mine! Lol! Thank you Phil! You rock!

So, I will close with a few things,

1. Love yourself where ever you might be at right now!
2. Be proud of your accomplishments
3. Never stop trying to do better! Never stop wanting more! Dig deeper! Compete w/ yourself!

Here is a favorite quote of mine,

Do not focus on Results,

Because you will NEVER change,

Focus on Change and YOU WILL GET RESULTS!

Luv you all!

xoxoxox