I love this site for all of it's information.  However, diet and nutrition is the most difficult to master.  I've spent the last hour reading about different nutritional plans and they all contradict each other.  I had great success with Jamie Eason's Live fit eating plan.  But, I got really sick of ground turkey. I'm trying to do my own thing, but it isn't working.  I could go back to her plan, but again, sick of ground turkey right now.  All I know is I'm not seeing the results I want.  Frustrating.  I may not be eating enough, but then again I may be just eating the wrong things.  I can't figure it out yet.  All I know is I am not putting on muscle like I want and I'm not lowering body fat.  I'm stuck.  I'm not happy.  I lift 5-6 days a week, I eat every 2-3 hours, I don't eat junk food or fast food, and I make sure I incorporate cardio on all but leg days.  I keep sugar to a minimum and I don't go crazy with carbs.  Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! 

I am really battling food cravings right now.  I'm dedicated to eating right, getting back on track.  I was good for a long time, but suddenly lost my desire to stay on point. Now, I'm ready to right this plane.  However, I am still having mad cravings for sugary things, something I don't normally want.  Food should be for fuel and energy, but unfortunately it becomes an obsession when you are trying to avoid junk.  I feel like a slave to my stomach.  So, what am I doing to fight these feelings and avoid the garbage you ask?  I am watching Man vs Food.  He is at a California State Fair visiting vendors who deep fry stuff.  All it takes is to see fat people gobbling down and inhaling deep fried Twinkies (GROSS!), deep fried cheesecake (BARF!) and deep fried cookie dough (GAG!) to make me never want sweets again.  I have always been completely grossed out by fair food, particularly the deep fried desserts that have come about.  Mission accomplished.  Not craving sugar anymore!

My downfall however is that I also watch things like The United States of Bacon and Guy Fieri when he visit BBQ hotspots.  Oh my God, me looooooooooooooooves animals!!!  They are so tasty

Sigh.......yes, I know.  I've ranted about this before.  Sorry, I'm just having a mood right now.  .

I wish I had the space and money for a home gym.  I like my Gold's and I've been there since 1999, but it's not very big.  When it's crowded, workouts take too long, or I can't get to what I want.  When the one decent leg extension machine breaks, it stays out of order for months, they just don't get it fixed in a timely manner.  I don't know what that's about, I haven't asked.  I guess considering I pay $99 a year, I shouldn't be complaining. Anywho.

My gym has all kinds of members, you can't really say it's a bodybuilder gym, or a rich white ladies gym, or a ghetto gym or a young person's gym.  It's just a gym, main stream America goes there.  Fat, skinny, tall, short, old, young, white, black, Hispanic, tattooed, inkless, you name it, we got it!  I like that, everyone can go and do their thing and not feel self conscious, unless they just do and that's another issue.  There is a small ladies only room, but it gets very little use.  I use it when all the dumbbells I need are missing from the main room's rack and I don't feel like searching. But, for the most part, no one cares that you're there, they just admire that you're trying. HOWEVER.....some people act like it is THEIR personal home gym and they have no consideration or respect for others who want to use stuff.  Triple setting when it's super busy is just not the thing to do.  But if you must, then don't be a douche bag when someone (me!) tries to use the aforementioned ONLY decent leg extension machine. Don't ruuuuuuuuuuuuuuun over to tell me "I'm using that!"  Guess what, I take very little time doing my thing, I will be done and gone before you even notice. What's it to you to let little ole me use the f@cking machine?  And it ain't just the boys, there are some b!tchy a$$ women there who do the same damn thing.  If you had to come over to tell me you're using the leg machine, then I'm guessing you weren't really using it at that moment, it was idle.  Just because you leave your little purple phone and matching water bottle next to it, does not make it yours if you are on the other side of the gym on the treadmill.  Also, leaving a note on said treadmill that says "be back in a minute" is f@cking stupid.

Next on my list, is people who sit on an empty bench to talk on their phone.  GET YOUR LAZY A$$ UP!!!!

Failure to put sh!t back where you got it should result in termination of membership. As should putting 7 plates on each side of the leg press or squat rack and leaving it when you're done.  If you can put 'em on there, you can take 'em off.  Really, you can. You can also put the 100 lb dumbbell back where it came from.  You don't have to leave it in front of the rack where the 15s are so I can trip over it.  Roll them back to the rack they came from with your foot if you have to.  If you can't hoist it back up, at least get it in the general vicinity.  The staff will put back on the rack for you, you wuss.

And finally, if I have my headphones on, then don't bother me.  I know this sounds rude, but seriously, I don't have time to spend chatting at the gym.  I want to get in, and get out, and not have it take 2 hours.  I utilize specific rest periods between sets, so when you come over and start talking at me, it screws up my rhythm.  And most of the time, it is some guy trying to tell me how to workout, or to brag about how much he knows about working out, or to sell me his workout services.  Honestly, if I haven't approached you with workout questions, there is a reason.  You may think I need help, but don't offer it on your own.  It's rude and will not get you a client or a date, whichever it is you are looking for.

And finally, for God's sake, don't wear jeans to workout!!!!!!  This is such a pet peeve of mine!!!

Okay, done....for now  

It's been awhile since I've blogged because I haven't had much to say.  But lately I've been thinking a lot about something.  I know it's going to piss people off, but....I don't really care.  I always piss someone off, even when I don't try.

We hear a lot about self acceptance.  We are told as women, we should accept ourselves the way we are. We are told as women that we are beautiful no matter our size, shape, age, height, weight or bra size.  We are told as women that the right man will love us as-is and won't want us to change. This is all well and fine and good.  I agree.  I'm not going to kill myself trying to achieve some impossible ideal.  Without surgery, I'll never be a 36DD.  However, I have a gripe about this because I don't think men are being honest. I see on this site, everyday, men posting pictures of women to their FitBoard.  Beautiful, perfect women with huge breasts and big round butts and perfect bodies. This is clearly what these men find attractive.  This is their ideal. This is what they think women should look like.  But, then these men will tell me or someone like me that we are beautiful.  This is confusing.  If we're so beautiful, why aren't you posting pictures of women who look like us on your FitBoard?  I have never seen a single man post a picture of a small chested woman on his FitBoard.  I have never seen a picture of a woman with a small butt shared or re-posted from someone else's profile.  Why is this?  If we are all so beautiful, then why aren't we all revered and cherished and celebrated the same way these other women are?  Seems to me that someone is lying....

We've all heard of it. The concept has been around for decades.  We all even believe that we embrace it and put it into action.  But I have recently discovered that I have not been capitalizing on the power of positive thinking in the past.  But for the past week, I have been using positive thought power at work.  I have started a new job and was very stressed about what it would be like.  On my first day there, I noticed something.  99% of the people I work with are enormously negative.  I have not heard a single nice, good, or positive thing come out of their mouths.  It is depressing.  I'm not saying I don't have a bit of a negative streak myself, I do. But I do manage to find the good in most people and things.  These new co workers however are a real drag. But, I'm trying not to let it get me down.  Maybe it's because I'm new and haven't become cynical yet, but I don't see it the way they do.  And I think it's because I'm coming at it with a positive attitude.  I suppose I'm naive to a point, but I just don't want to have another job that I hate going to and that I dread every day.  I want to be happy since I have to spend a third of my life there.  These new peers of mine bitch and moan all day long about how rude and stupid the passengers are.  I guess either I haven't experienced a rude or stupid one yet, or I have a higher threshold for rudeness and stupidity.  What they see as rude, I see as just uneasy or nervous, or what they see as stupid I see as uninformed or ignorant.  And while I haven't had a lot of interaction with the supervisors, I don't really see any huge issues with them. But to a man, they all complain, complain, complain non stop about what *******s the supervisors are.  I smile and laugh all day long and I thank the passengers, I talk to them and ask them where they're flying to.  And at the end of the day, I leave feeling happy and ready to hit the gym.  Which brings me to my next point.  I'm taking this positive thinking to my workouts.  I am not going to stress over my diet and feel guilty over my cheat meals.  I'm just gonna keep that vision in my head of what I want to look like and it will come.  That's the power of positive thinking!

W

Preheat oven to 400.  Prep a baking sheet with non-stick cooking spray.

3 large yams, washed, peeled and cubed

2 tbsp olive oil

2 tbsp brown sugar

1 tsp chili power

1/2 tsp salt

1/4 tsp cayenne powder

Place potatoes in a large ziploc bag or bowl and add olive oil.  Mix to coat.  In a small bowl combine remaining ingredients.  Add spices to potatoes and mix well.  Spread potatoes on prepared baking sheet and bake 30-40 minutes until tender.  Stir potatoes every 15 minutes. 

Why is it that one of the first things a lot people do when they join this site is private message others their email address and ask for photos?  Or ask for an email address and offer their own photos?  I realize that this site encourages members to post photos of their bodies.  But, what it really does, is it encourages the vain to display themselves to receive the attention they crave and the compliments they live for. Now, don't get me wrong.  I'm not saying everyone who posts revealing pictures is doing it for this reason.  What I'm saying is, there is a difference between a photo that displays muscle, definition, size and progress and one that is just displaying sex. These have nothing to do with fitness.  You do not need to take a photo of yourself with a wash cloth held in front of your junk to show your chest definition.  You do not need to put on fishnet stockings and leopard print heels to show how you've improved your back.  But, as there are a lot of people out there who are very full of themselves, a site like this is just what they need to fuel their narcissism and vanity. And with people like that out there, it encourages others to see what they can get away with. It's basically free porn if you think about it.  There are even Body Groups set up with names like Co Ed Pic Trading. A woman posts a photo of herself lying in bed in lingerie and heels, naturally a bunch of people are going to message her and ask for personal photos to be sent to them. They can see what she's posted here, so they want more. And by posting such photos, people assume this woman is loose, or sleazy or trashy and that she will send the photos to them.  Maybe she will, or maybe she just gets off on the compliments and likes having a bunch of strangers fawn over her and feed her ego. I'm not saying I'm not guilty of posting provocative photos, I am.  But as I received unwanted attention from them, I took them down.  It was a mistake that I won't make again.  I do not respond to messages requesting photos, I delete them. It is nice to get compliments if they are genuine, but I quickly realized that people are just saying whatever they think they need to say to try and manipulate me into sending them private photos.  My self esteem is not that low.  I don't need the fake compliments of strangers to feel good.  I know I am not beautiful or stunning, so messaging that to me is so patronizing.  I don't even have the comments enabled on my gallery photos anymore. But some people need to be told over and over how great they look, how hot they are, how awesome they must be, and that's why you see these people change their profile photo every single day, several dozen times a day.  It keeps them on the front page of the site where they will get compliments, friend requests, and attention. I am not directing this at anyone currently on my friend list.  I have removed the people who do this as it is annoying to log on everyday and see the entire news feed is of one person posting the same damn photo or photos two dozen times.  It is okay to be proud of your success, but there is a reason pride is one of the deadly sins.  It can become a very ugly trait.  I realize this is going to offend a lot of people, and I mean no disrespect.  I have just noticed for a while now that there is a particular group of people on here, none are on my friend list but they seem to be on everyone else's, that aren't so much into fitness as they are into themselves and making sure we all get to bask in their self perceived awesomeness.

I don't ask for much in this world. A safe, comfortable place to live. Food on the table. Friends and
family who love me. I'd also like people
to be courteous and respectful. This is apparently too much to ask at the
gym. The gym is a perfect little
microcosm of the world we live in. In it
exists the same irritating people that we must encounter every day at work and
the mall. But at the gym, it is harder
to get away from them

1. First and foremost is the muscle head. He is not always what you would call “in shape”. He is usually a large man, not muscular
large, just large. He exists only to get
bigger. But he does not do so
silently. He is the one in front of the
mirror screaming and yelling and dropping and slamming weights so we all look
and see how much he is lifting. Yes, we
see you. We do not care.

2. Next you have your bubble headed bimbo in full hair and makeup. She is also by the mirror checking herself
out as she speed lifts those 5 pound dumbbells. She will spend two hours at the gym and leave with makeup and hair
perfectly intact.

3. Then you have your newbies, the ones who want to start working out but
don't know where to start. Other than
getting in everyone's way, they are harmless. I give them kudos for being there and if they stick it out, they will
learn eventually.

4. High school boys. These usually
travel in packs of 3 or 4. They are
built like stick figures, but that doesn't stop them from grabbing the heaviest
weights they can move off the rack and trying to lift them. They try, but are way too distracted by the
women there to really do anything significant.

5. Probably the most annoying are the super fit women who walk around the
gym with their game face on, which usually looks pissed off. They know what they are doing and they've
done it. They look great. They are focused and determined and like to
triple set with 3 stations that are as far apart from each other as they can
be. However, the fact that they will be away from two of them for at least 10
minutes means nothing, you better not DARE try to use on of "their"
stations. They will destroy you.

6. Next on the annoying list are the super fit dudes. They too know what they’re doing and they’ve
done it, but they want to make sure they get the admiration they deserve, so
they spend a lot of time flexing in the mirror and lifting their shirts to rub
their own abs.

After this, you have a hodge podge of irritating idiots who do not know how
to exercise proper gym etiquette. My top
gym pet peeves:

1. People who stand right in front of the dumbbell rack while using the
dumbbells. Move your ass, and don’t get pissy with me when I reach around you
to grab weights.

2. People who lounge on the machines and use them to rest between their
sets on other machines. You’re at the
gym, you can stand between sets, idiot.

3. People who come to the gym sick. What the Hell?! We don’t want to
listen to you hacking up a lung next to us on the treadmill. If you are sick, STAY HOME. You’re not being a hero, you’re spreading
infectious disease, moron. One of you
idiots is the reason I had to deal with mumps at the age of 42.

4. RE-RACK YOUR WEIGHTS! RE-RACK YOUR WEIGHTS! RE-RACK YOUR WEIGHTS!
RE-RACK YOUR WEIGHTS!

5. People who wear jeans to the gym. How can you possibly be comfortable? I know this doesn’t affect my workout directly, it just annoys me.

6. Anorexic/bulimic bitches running around like psychos because they gotta
be thinner, gotta be thinner, gotta be thinner. Eat a ****ing sandwich!!

7. People who cannot put their cell phone down long enough to workout. They spend most of their workout texting,
sometimes as they lift. I’ve seen
it. One stupid schmo was rowing with one
hand and talking on the phone with the other. They are either stopping to text or yakking on their bluetooth
headset. And as they do this, they
wander around getting in everyone else’s way. If your life/work is that pressing, stay home. You all talk too loud anyway because you want
us to know you’re important.

8. Personal trainers who look like crap.

9. Lunk heads who cannot seem to get enough weight on a machine. They find creative ways to stack and hang
plates off the stack pin or they get friends to sit on top of the leg
press. Give me a break, stupid. Or find a gym that can provide you with 2
tons to lift as you’ve obviously outgrown this one.

10. People who see me on a bench/machine and still take it. Then act shocked when I say something. Please understand, I will say something to
you, I will not say it nicely, and I do not care if you like it. Don’t be a douchebag and take a station that
is clearly in use. I pay just like you
do, your workout is not more important than mine.

Thank you.

I personally do not like spending hours at the gym.  My typical workout is anywhere from an hour to an hour and a half, depending on what I'm doing.  If it's crowded, that can keep me there a little longer as well.  But, it's one thing for it to be crowded and not be able to get to what I want because others are working out on a particular station.  It's another thing to not be able to get to what I want because some jackass is lounging on it.  The other day, I wanted the seated leg curl, but this dude was there, so I settled for the standing single-leg leg curl right next to it.  I did 4 sets, and the entire time it took me to do 4 sets, he sat...and sat....and sat.....never once did he curl anything.  He lounged his ****ing ass the whole time!  Then, as I was done and gathering my stuff, his trainer came by and got him so they could start their session.  I've never wanted to punch an old man before, but I did that day.  

Before I begin, let me preface this by saying I do love the male form.  I'm not opposed to it in any way.  With that said, please do not send friend requests if your profile picture has your junk showing.  Come on now, we all preview our pictures.  We know exactly what we're posting.  Crop that ****!  Even the most ghetto smart phone has a crop/edit feature.  And if it doesn't, send it to your computer and fix it there.  If you are posting pictures like that, you are here for the wrong reasons.  I picture can be provacative, sensual and revealing, but still hold a tasteful, aesthetic appeal.  Trust me, if I feel that I want to see more, I'll just ask you to send it privately.  But let's cross that bridge when we get to it. Thanks.

Oh how I love thee!  You are tasty and filling.  You are comforting and warm.  You are delicious in the winter and delicious in the summer. Bread, my darling, I could live on you and you alone.  Pasta, well, I haven't forgotten you either.  Rice, oh rice, how you delight me every time.  And cereal, lets not forget cereal!  As a kid there was nothing better than you for dinner.  As an adult, I feel the same way.  How many evenings have I longed to have you?  Many.  And it's not just cereal that makes me feel so slooooooopy in the morning and slurrrrrrrvy in the evening.  Waffles, too.  All warm and buttery and good.....but I must be strong.  I must resist.  I must remember that you are a wolf in sheep's clothing.  You tempt me with your sweetness only to consume me if I get too lazy.  I can't have you all the time, even though I want you....all the time.  ***sigh***

I'm not exactly sure what goes through people's heads, but there is a serious need for a re-adjusment in some brains.  I'm on the incline bench today, all my stuff is there, I'm CLEARLY using it.  This dude walks over, throws his towel on it, and starts doing some dumbbell curls.  I'm not really in the mood to talk so I grab my stuff, go to another bench and set my stuff down.  I kid you not, he grabs his towel, comes over to my new bench, and throws his towel down on it!  I said, "Okay now, you took my one bench, now you're taking this one too?"  He says, "No, I didn't take anything."  ****ing idiot. Not only do people not respect others' personal space, they don't even have a good reason for it.  Sigh, I just have to shake my head and pray for these pinheads. 

I have spent the last month completely wrapped up in my training.  I have obsessed over food and macros and weighing and counting and controlling.  I have lifted countless pounds, pushing through fatigue and weakness and hopelessness.  They say it only takes 30 days to develop a habit.  I have never been unwilling or unmotivated to work out.  I have, however, been kidding myself on what else I needed to do to reach my goals.  Now that I have spent this past month focusing on nutrition, I am finally seeing results that make me happy.  Yesterday, I took a good look in the mirror at the gym, and I saw what I had been hoping for all this time.  And even though right at this moment I am having such a craving for bad, greasy, fatty junk food, I have the willpower, resolve and commitment to self to say "NO" and go grab an apple.  Yay me!

Eating clean and healthy is BORING.  It is mundane, repetitive and bland.  But, it can be done with dedication, spices and a strong desire to succeed.  The problem I'm having is getting the right balance of carbs, protein, fat and calories.  I am going over on my fats and under on my protein.  Carbs and calories and doing pretty well, a few days here and there where I was a under on both. What are some high protein, low fat foods with little carbs and calories that I can eat later in the day, say after 7pm?  I get so hungry then, but don't have too many options here in the house that won't throw me way over on fat or carbs.