The Best is Yet to Come

because I skipped my workout. Came home from work and crashed, but I needed the sleep since I didn’t get enough last night.  That and my quads are killing me from Monday yet.

Yes, Mr. Man, I will get my bench workout in tomorrow after work - nag, nag, NAG!!!! LOL - good thing they have a nice steam room and whirlpool at my gym - I have a feeling I’ll be taking full advantage of both.

If I could get a leg up
If I could get a leg over boy
You know I ain’t that pretty
But you know I ain’t shy, shy, shy

Today is leg day - and finally, I got enough sleep for a change. Last week was a bad one for slumber - kept waking up in the middle of the night for no apparent reason. Now, I still woke up again last night, but since I’d gone to bed earlier than I have been I’m still feeling much more rested this morning.

So….tonight’s workout - going straight after work:

Warmup with 15 minutes on the elliptical

Squats - 3 x 12 @ 115

Leg Press - 3 x 12 @ 180

Leg Extensions -  3 x 12 @ 60

Hamstring curls -  3 x 12 @ 60

Followed up with some ab work and 30 minutes of cardio on the elliptical

Sticking very strictly to my diet - adjusted from carb cycling to a 50/30/20 split - lots of chicken, fish and eggs.

My birthday is coming up pretty damn quick - and I refuse to start another year out of shape.

An angel’s spirit will dance in the clouds
As we sing her last lullabye

It is with a heavy heart and a teary eye that I make my way through today……and many are out of the office altogether.

The wake for Lindsey is this evening, with the funeral service tomorrow. I shall have to go purchase something yellow, as that was her favorite color and people are honoring her memory by wearing it. This is one reason to go shopping that I could have done without.

I’m so very sad right now……just got an update on my coworker’s daughter. Please, take a minute if you have one and pray for her and her family for strength and courage as this brave little girl moves on to a better place free of needles, x-rays, hospitals and pain.

It makes you wonder about life and purpose and why are we here in the first place…….so sad that such a young life is being taken, but she has made a big impact on so many in her 6 short years.

Here is the message…..so heartbreaking - Ben is her brother. He just shaved his head in a fundraiser to raise money to help fight childhood cancer a week ago.

Lindsey has had a very rough week. On Friday we scheduled an MRI for first thing this morning. It is very hard for us to tell you that her cancer has returned stronger than ever - she has multiple tumors growing throughout her brain. There is no more treatment for Lindsey, no more medicines, no more needles, no more surgeries, no more radiation. Because of the extensive tumor growth the doctors think she has very little time left with us.

Thanks for checking in on our beautiful baby girl.

4/22/08 - Update….little Lindsey has passed on to a better place where there is no more pain. May she rest in peace.

We come into the world to take our chances
Fate is just the weight of circumstances
That’s the way that lady luck dances
Roll the bones, roll the bones

Life has been quite interesting recently…..with some changes in relationships and some very pleasant surprises. Just goes to show that sometimes you may find that special spark when you’re least looking for it.

Diet is back on track - finally. Aiming for a 50/30/20 split - was going to go back to a 40/40/20, but can’t bring myself to eat that many carbs. My biggest struggle lately has been not eating enough - sounds funny, but it’s definitely been the case. Not smart, I know. So now I’m really focusing on getting my 6 small meals throughout the day with the right mix of protein/carbs/fats - when I’m really focused and disciplined, my results are amazing.

Still working on getting completely back into my workout routine - the mornings are such a bitch, and I’m NOT a good morning person. BUT, I know to see the best results, I need to be getting in my morning AND evening workouts. *sigh* And the funny part is that I know how good I feel when I do, but sometimes it’s just the getting there that’s the hard part.  Doing squats and legs tonight, and may go tanning afterwards.

Sleep has also been a problem for me - I’ve been staying up too late which makes it SO much harder than it normally is to drag my ass out of bed in the mornings. Sucks. Now that my thyroid levels appear to be back to normal, I’m just sabotaging myself. Going to make sure I’m in bed between 9 and 10pm tonight.

Had a great weekend with my friends and family back home, which is always good for the soul. I count myself so very lucky to have them all in my life, even though on Saturday two of my best GF’s were so very cruel to me by providing endless drinks - regardless, a good time was had by all and yesterday’s hangover wasn’t as bad as I expected it to be.

Happy Monday

On any day when I’m feeling sorry for myself or having a pity party for one - I have to kick myself in the ass and remember the wonderful blessings that I should be thankful for, the simple and not so simple aspects of my life that allow me freedom and the ability to do as I wish.

My coworker’s daughter is 6 years old now, and has been battling cancer since she was 3. Lindsey has a brain tumor.

Today, Lindsey is not doing so well and her mother doesn’t know, nor do the doctors, what is making her feel out of sorts. She’s nauseous, not eating and very miserable. This is not good - not good at all. She’d been doing pretty well and had been believed to be in remission until this last Christmas Eve when she took a turn for the worse. Her parents took her in to the doctors and yes, sadly, not only had her tumor returned in the same place in her brain, but another one accompanied it this time.

I don’t know how I would be able to get through the same situation if I had a child who was potentially terminally ill. Would I keep fighting and trying anything to help her survive? Probably, but when do you call it quits and let her fate rest in the hands of a higher power? How do you decide when enough is enough? I can only imagine how heartwrenching these choices must be, but I cannot know because I’m not living it.

So it’s with a bit of a heavy heart that I start this week off, because I’m worried for her family and crossing my fingers and toes, saying all the prayers I possibly can while wishing and hoping for the best.

If you have a spare moment and are reading this, please say a prayer for Lindsey and her family.

Tossed and turned a lot, forgot to set the timer on the TV, so it woke me up in the middle of the night. Got a text message at the buttcrack of dawn that woke me up - but it’s all good. Fell BACK asleep and woke up, jumped in the shower and almost missed my train - so I did the 100 yard dash in 3" heels to catch it just in time. At least I got some cardio in this morning!

I’m still sore from my back and shoulder workout on Friday - Eek! Now I normally expect to be somewhat sore for a day or two, but this time I’m REALLY sore! Not sure how I’m going to approach my squat workout for tonight - I may just go with cardio today, but will have to see how I’m feeling later. I’m really looking forward to relaxing in the whirlpool and steam room before I go and imagine myself on a beach with near-naked cabana boys while I tan - aaah, 15 minutes of bliss .

Sadly, I double checked with my pharmacist and physician - and they both wholeheartedly agree that I should NOT take any fat burners whatsoever. This is mainly due to my hypothyroidism - but the also both agree that fat burners are not a good idea for anyone. Oh well. Looks like I’m sticking to my multi-vitamin and whey protein as far as any supplementation goes.

I overindulged a bit during the weekend spent with my best friends….a little too much homemade Mexican food, and definitely too many wine coolers and margaritas - but you can never have too much fun and we had a blast. And I think we all needed some good quality girlfriend time.

I’m so very thankful that I have 3 of the best girlfriends one could ask for - they’re always there for me when I need them and support and encourage me no matter what. Men may come and go, but that kind of unconditional friendship is priceless.

Finally, the haze is lifted and I’m back to my normal smily, happy, sunshiney self once more. And it’s a damn good thing too, since I was about to pop whoever that was impersonating me square in the jaw for being a whiny, emotional froot loop.

I’m really enjoying having my normal energy levels back again and have gotten back into my morning workout routine - which is fantastic, since my energy stays up for the rest of the day and I feel physically refreshed, as opposed to the sluggishness that I’d been enduring for the last few months.

Work is going exceptionally well, along with everything else. There have been some major departmental and organizational shifts in my office, and thankfully, I get to enjoy the rewards and positive aspects of this. My position is changing a bit once more, but it’s only for the better and is getting back to what my career focus has been all along.

Nutritionally, I could do a bit better, but even with all the obstacles recently I’ve still done pretty well. I’ve managed to avoid slipping back into the old self-destructive eating patterns that caused me to gain all the weight in the first place, so I’m extremely proud of myself.

Still have a few personal challenges to tackle, but with a renewed sense of self and the regaining of my usual positive outlook, it’s all good.

Bring it on.