Brains, Brawn and Bamboo

As of this morning, my weight is up to 163 lbs. A lot better than it was a couple of weeks ago. I’m still not going to set any weight goals - colitis is to tricksy for that - but I am pleased that I’m back in the 160’s, and I’ll be elated if I can get back to 170+. At the moment, I’m consuming 3300-4000 calories a day and it feels like chicken-feed, so there is room for increased consumption.

My cold is on its way out, thank goodness. Being hit with colitis and the flu was a double-whammy I didn’t need. I think I’ll be able to start some harder training in a week or two. As to what that will be, I don’t know. I have kettlebells (a 16KG and 24KG); what with gyms being packed in the New Year with the ‘Resolutioners’, it might be an idea to focus on them since the work can be done at home. Of course, nothing packs on meat like heavy weights. We’ll see.

I need to focus more on the internal aspects of kung fu. I ordered and received John Du Cane’s Qigong Recharge kit from dragondoor.com (the land of Pavel and kettebells etc.). It only took three days to be delivered, and I’m in the UK - excellent customer service and shipping! The movements of the form are more gentle and slow than I’m used to with my hard-style kung fu, but then I guess that’s the point. Practice will yield results, I’m sure.

Slowly does it. 2009 has been a rotten year for me, at least health-wise. I will recover by the year’s end, and be in a position to make 2010 the best year of my life. Never back down.

Hot: Michele Levesque on the cover of MuscleMag December 2009 [UK] - sexy, powerful picture. What an ass!

Not: The rest of that same magazine. Just a massive ‘magic-powder’ catalogue, with pages of bloated, chemical-filled behemoths and the worst ’sexiest women’ section ever (pouty-faced bimbos dressed like porn stars, all with too much make-up on…)

Another aggressive flare-up of colitis. Another week in hospital, hooked up to all manner of tubes, chemicals and, at one point, an oxygen mask. Another terrible week in a year that has seen me in and out of hospital with this thing like a yo-yo.

I’m out now. All 158 Lbs of me. Bleargh.

I’m on another course of steroids in the short-term. Long term, options are running out. Since I can’t stay on steroids forever, and I haven’t tolerated their substitutes (they’ve made me worse), there are only two courses left:

1. Infleximab. As I have Colitis, rather than Chrons, my doctors are having to appeal to the local Health Authority for the funding for this approach. It involves infusions of biologic compounds direct into the bloodstream every two months. There’s about a 1-in-3 chance of success, assuming I get the funding and go-ahead.

(In my mind, the infusions take place like a scene from Wolverine’s dark past - I’ll be suspended in a vertical vat of power government goop with only a rebreather mask and hairy chest for cover…in reality, it’s just lying down on a bed for a few hours with a drip)

2. Surgery.

I’m not saying anything more about option 2. As far as I’m concerned, I’m not going to contemplate it until option 1 is completely explored.

While I’d like to get back to 170lbs, I’m not going to stress it. I can’t. Pushing my body/digestive system too hard could bring me crashing down again, and that just brings me closer to the surgical option. So, no weight goals, no bulking diets, no ‘harder, stronger, faster’…not any more. Sorry. It’s just not healthy or wise. I don’t want surgery. My body is the only one I have. I can’t risk it.

I’m going to move more toward the internal aspects of Kung Fu - qigong, meditation etc. Hopefully, I can cultivate great internal energy and power, even if I can’t fill my muscles with throbbing fibres. I’ll try and strike a balance, though. Kettlebell training for the hard style, qigong/internal arts for the soft style. On my terms. For my body and health.

Since that’s the case, I’m struggling to justify staying on Bodyspace. I’m not out to, nor will I ever likely attain a ‘rocking body’ (colitis has a habit of distending the gut anyway). I’m not going to push super-heavy weights, or model, or any of that ’bodybuilding’ stuff. Don’t suppose there is a graph that measures ‘internal energy’, is there?!

I don’t know yet. I’ll see. I do like reading about others, and trying to motivate and help them (despite my broken body, my mind is reasonably knowledgeable). I accept, however, that I’m not exactly a physical spokesperson for the site, or others who have different, non-medically-influenced goals.

The greatest battles happen within. I’m hoping I can find the pivot point between angel and beast and achieve balance. Until then, be calm, and seek to fill all your actions with love.

PS: I still want to tear a deck of cards in half, though…! 

Last week, I started the abbreviated Super Squats program, found in Randall J. Strossen’s brilliant book, ‘Super Squats: How to Gain 30 Pounds of Muscle in 6 Weeks‘. You can find out more in the ‘Workout’ section of my Bodyspace. My goal is to hit the program for 7 weeks total (which will bring me up to the end of November) and gain as much muscle as possible.

This past Saturday - that is, after a week on the program - I weighed myself and found I had gained 5lbs!

I’ve got 6 weeks left to do, and if I can keep that rate of growth up I will be able to match the claims by the book. All barbell exercises utilise Fat Gripz, too. These are great; they turn everything into a thick-handled exercise. As a consequence, they also make everything much harder. Which is great!

Colitis is settled. Still pounding the fish oil and turmeric - and no medication - and I feel really stable. Taking the opportunity to grow as much as possible. Maybe when I’m done, I’ll feel good enough to post pictures up.

Oh, and my card tearing is coming along nicely. Went through 25 cards last night - going to try and rip a whole deck by December.

Hope everyone else is feeling well. Fight for the muscle - power belongs to those who take it!

The last couple of days, I’ve been doing something different. Something very small, but different. And my colitis has really begun to settle.

I’ve tripled my fish oil intake.

It’s an experiment, based on an article I read about Fish Oil on T-Nation. Basically, you should have 1000mg Fish Oil per % of bodyfat. At about 9%, that means 9 capsules a day. I’ve worked up to 8 a day. While it’s only been a couple of days, I feel so much better. The symptoms of colitis have cleared up with shocking quickness. Not completely gone, yet, but it’s getting there. Fast.

I don’t want to jinx anything, but…well…

Have I cracked the Colitis code?

Feeling optimistic. Feeling good about future. Going to work up to 10 a day (to cover my bases) and work in some Curcumin tabs (if I can find them), which also have some evidence of helping colitis.

No medication. No powerful foreign chemicals. Just lots of water and natural supplements.

Here’s hoping that it’s not a fluke. I feel like I’ve finally found a crack in the armour of this thing. Time to take advantage of it!

I have been taking no medication for about a month now. In that time, my colitis has settled…to an extent. I’m hardly losing any blood at all, but I am still losing blood too frequently for my liking. I find it difficult to eat - both lack of appetite and cramping/pains/urge to go to the toilet when I do. I’m at 160 Lbs and I’m desperately fighting not to lose anymore weight. I’d love to regain the lost weight and get back to 170 Lbs, but at the moment I’m not sure I can do that without setting my colitis off in a big way.

Feels like the demon in my gut is sleeping with one eye open. I’m stable to a point, but I’m no where near 100%, and nutritionally/training-wise I’m walking on thin ice trying not the wake the beast up and engage in another full-on flare-up assault.

Taking it easy is wise and kind, but it is also frustrating.

I have issues with the Chron’s Disease article on the main site. It’s not the same as Colitis, but it is similar. Encouraging me to eat lots of food is noble but misguided advice. That would cause me a to cramp up in a seriously painful way, elicit the need for more toilet action (and therefore more potential blood loss) and risk a flare-up.  I’ve been there, done that, and it doesn’t work (unless ‘work’ means ‘lots of pain for little reward, and maybe even negative consequences’). I wonder if the authors of these articles have ever had to live with the day-to-day trials of chrons or colitis. If they had, I wonder if they’d be so ready in saying ‘eat plenty’ without acknowledging the discomfort and difficulty of that advice. Still, at least they are trying to address the issue. Not bad-mouthing them; just saying reality is often different from theory, and that you should judge all information critically based on you’re on experiences.

I’d like to say training is going great, but it’s not. I’m taking it easy to try and not end up in hospital again. Very frustrating. But I am off the meds, and I’m generally no worse as a result. Hopefully, if I give it a bit of time, my body can fully heal itself. Naturally.

I hope everyone else is having great success with their health, wealth and training. Be kind to each other, and fight like a devil for your dreams.

Colitis is still there, but subsiding. The blood loss has been having an impact on me (getting cold when I wouldn’t normally, feeling tired and weak), but the frequency and amount is starting to stall -all without medication. I’m hoping that this is a sign that my body is self-regulating; finally beginning to heal itself. Time will tell if I can get in complete control again.

I’ve been casting half an eye to the future. As usual, I’ve lost weight…again…thanks to colitis having a tantrum. I’ll record just how bad it is tomorrow. As for now, I feel I need to put on some weight. I certainly want to get back to 170lbs as quickly (but as safely) as possible. I’m considering what to do with my diet (thinking more liquid meals, as less digestive stress) and potential training. Anyone with mass gaining tips/workouts etc., please feel free to help a skinny wretch in need of serious mass!

Have been thinking that, until colitis is properly subsided and under control (and hopefully that is the direction I’m going in, rather than suprise aggresive flare-up!), I might try some weighted-vest walks. Build some strength endurance with relatively low physical stress, combined with walking meditation, maybe?

Of course, I’ve also been considering 20-rep Death Squats supplemented with crazy mass gainer shakes, just to shock some weight back on. I’m an idiot like that.

I’m feeling better, even if I’m not better. Looking forward to increasing my training soon. Hope everyone out there doing fine - stay healthy, and be kind.

First, the situation.

Roughly two weeks ago the medication I had been slowly getting used to over the past month was increased from a half-dose to a full dose. Like before, this increase prompted my body to have a bad reaction: nausea, cramps, lack of appetite…god, the constant nausea. This past Tuesday, I reached Breaking Point. I’d had enough; enough of taking medication that either didn’t do anything or that made me more ill than the colitis it was meant to control.

I made a decision to stop taking it. Moreover, I made a decision to stop taking all my medication. It either did nothing or made me worse. I don’t know much about anything, but experience has taught me something that I now realise my intuition knew all along: that powerful foreign chemicals are not the way to control my condition.

Since stopping the medication, the nausea, lack of appetite etc. caused by the medication cleared up, almost over night. Good. Unfortunately, since then my colitis has been having a ‘wobble’, and I’ve been bleeding/cramping again. Bad. That is now, also, starting to clear up. Good. I’m hoping it was just a reaction to the changing chemicals in my body.

I haven’t gone sans medication in over three years. My hope is that, by giving my body time to flush out all foreign substances, I can encourage natural healing and regeneration that dependence on medication may have repressed.

And that’s the main crux of why I’ve made this decision. It occured to me that colitis has completely dominated my worldview for the past. By taking the medication, by believing that my health and wellbeing was dependent on the myriad of tablets I was prescribed, I was reinforcing a dangerous thought-paradigm: I am ill, I am broken, I am fighting a battle everyday with myself.

I am now resolved to break this thought process. Rather than drowning out my body’s crying, smothering it with drugs, I am setting it free. I will listen to what I need. I will meditate and engage in a conversation with my heart about what the initial emergence of colitis was trying to say, and I will respond in kind.

This is not the first and last thing I will say on the issue, but I am coming to see that, maybe, the predominately Western belief of ‘No Pain, No Gain’ is dangerous. Struggle and effort are not, but beating yourself down in spite of your self is. This issue especially affects bodybuilders, fitness athletes, sportsmen and champions of physicality of all methodologies. Too often do we repress the symptoms of a whole and intelligent body to ruthlessly pursue a goal. Again, goal orientation is not a problem, but the savagery, the reckless abandon with which people attack things…I don’t know whether that’s entirely good anymore.

Certainly, I don’t think it’s right for me anymore.

I’ve put any hard goals (rep limits, weights etc.) on hold until I am able to establish a deep connection with my body, my subconscious and my place in life. I’m taking time to talk to my heart. What are you trying to say, body? How can we help each other?

Sorry if this is too new-age or hippy for some of you. I don’t mean to make you squirm. But sometimes, you have to try something radically different.

I’ll be back with more. For now, thank you for reading. Comments are, of course, welcome.

I am back from holiday and I am feeling good. Colitis is under control, my weight is stable at much lower calories, and I am ready to do some serious training.

For the next three and a half months - that is, until the Christmas holidays! - I will be attacking a multi-faceted training plan, designed to augment all aspects of my physicality: strength, stamina, skill, speed and controlled savagery. It is my own version of cross-training - you can read more details in the ‘Workout’ section of my Bodyspace - but incorporates barbells, kettlebells, calisthenics, martial arts and a sprinkling of insanity!

I haven’t go all my goals worked out yet, but here are those I do:

1. Rip an entire deck of cards in half with my bare hands.

2. Complete 100+ pushups in 2 minutes

3. Complete 100+ Sit-Ups in 2 minutes

4. Complete 20+ Pullups with Tactical (No-Thumbs) Grip

5. Gymnastic Bridge for 3 minutes (to advance to Full Wrestlers Bridge)

Why the numbers for 2-4? They’re the desirable/competetive figures required of Navy SEAL recruits*. Colitis means I can’t be in the army, but I can train to be ‘army tough’ - hell, I’m training to be Special Services tough! Achieving Pavel’s challenge of 200 snatches in 10 minutes with a 24KG kettlebell would also qualify as Special Service Tough, though I only have a 16KG kettlebell at the moment, and my snatch numbers with it are vastly beneath that target. Still, that is why we train; to get better.

It’s going to be hard, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.

Now…CHARGE!

* Minimum figures = Pushups/42, Situps/50, Pullups/8

Went to the gym for the first time in…ooh, 6-7 weeks. Wanted to see how much of my strength I’d retained in the ‘big three’ since following Pavel’s ‘Power to the People’ program. My best results are below.

Deadlift: 105KG / 231 Lbs x 3 (-7 reps PB)

Bench Press: 65KG / 143 Lbs x 4 (-1 rep PB)

Squat: 70KG / 154 Lbs x 5 (-15KG / 33 PB)

My Bench has fared quite well, only dropping the one rep (I thank all the pushups I’ve been doing). My deadlift reps are slightly down, but then getting 10 reps at the end of PTP was the culmination of 3 months hard work, and I’d rested specifically to tackle such a task. My Squat is dissapointing. I like to think I have strong legs. It’s understandable though, as I did these at the end of the workout, so I didn’t have as much to throw at them.

Also, all the above were reached by the 5 x 5 method, rather than the PTP method (one 100% set and one 90% set), so while the weights/reps are down, the overall volume was way up - in a way, I’m pleased I did so well when such high volume (for weight training) is so unusual for me. I’m also 7 Lbs lighter than when I last attempted these maxes, as well as three weeks out of hospital, rather than three months! Good effort I’d say.

It also demonstrates Pavel’s belief that strength is a skill. I shall meditate on how I can fit this truism into my own ‘instinctive, naked warrior’ way of training.

I also tested how good my barbell curl was (it wasn’t - 25KG / 55 Lbs x 5!) and, after a set of dips to failure, went for a swim. I’m a big fan of the breaststroke (urge to make inappropriate comment…rising…), but this time I mixed it up with front crawl, which I deployed every 5th lap. I only did 20 laps total - I’m hoping to work up to 100 in this format.

Felt good to attack the weights again!

Snippets from my life.

1. Tests reveal I am NOT suffering from adreneal suppression. This is, of course, a good thing. The docs have put me on a new medication as a substitute for the one that made me nauseaous and landed me in hospital recently. Hopefully, it will do it’s job (stop colitis flare-ups) without the side-effects of the previous medication (make me as ill as when I have a colitis flare-up…)

2. No more pullups in the house for me. The door gym I have, which hangs off any door frame and uses your own weight to remain there (very clever) has been, with my repeated use of the device, carving out chunks of plaster above the doors in my house. As we rent, my girlfriend has forbidden me using it for fear of damaging the house beyond our ability to repair it and thereby endanger our deposit. Boo! I see her point but, damn, was I a bit sulky when she threw down that law. I don’t want to go to the gym everytime I want to do pullups…but it seems I have little choice, or rather little opportunity to do pullups, until I find an alternative.

3. In better news, I smoked my Kettlebell Swing (16KG / 35 Lbs) previous best by about 20 reps. I say about, because I can’t find where I wrote down my Kettlebell work from before my hospitalisation earlier this year (the last time I worked swings), but I know I did a lot better this time around: 242 swings in 12 minutes, and I felt a lot more energised than I remember doing before. Could have done more, but my wrists started hurting from the surprise stimulus (a downside of my current ‘instinctive’ training, where you do something everyday, but that something could be absolutely anything. Like Crosstraining, only without the destructive belief that unless you vomit you’re not working hard enough.)

4. Part of my success in the swings is new deep breathing techniques I have been incorporating into my exercise. Not only did it help with the kettlebell work, but I’ve also been using them to help me power through ordinarily super-tough kung fu workouts. Wednesday Kung Fu training is hella-tough, but this past Wednesday, with the deep breathing, I managed amazingly well - full of energy and ready to keep going when the session was done. Hurrah!

5. Have received Brooks Kubik’s book, Dinosaur Training. Everything I’ve read about it suggests it’s a must-have in any fitness fanatic’s library. I look forward to assimilating its knowledge.

Probably going to hit the gym tommorrow and see where my strength in the ‘big three’ (Deadlift, Squat and Bench Press) stands after 6-7 weeks of not doing them. Gonna try and work up to my previous maxes, just to keep the strength in my body, and finish off with a swim.

Let me know what you’re up to!