Brains, Brawn and Bamboo

No quote this time. Or for a while. I’m taking a break from Bodyspace.

Eight months in since I started going to the gym and I’m 170 Pounds, or 12.2 Stone. That’s one pound down from the beginning of May. Worse, it’s only two pounds heavier than when I started eight months ago.

Two pounds in eight months. That’s not progress.

I’m moving house very soon, and that combined with my job location shifting dramatically means I am not willing to spend time on the internet or gym…just yet. I need to go into hibernation. Catch my breath. Regroup. Need to get back into a routine and plan a way forward so that I actually make serious progress and not just gain/lose 1 pound every couple of months. Figure out what it is I want to be; what I’m willing to give, and give up.

I’ll still browse the site whenever I can. I’ll check out peoples pages, leave comments when I think it necessary, etc. But I wont be updating my Bodyspace page for a while. Not until I feel I’m worthy of doing so. Not until I have something to show for my efforts.

Thanks to those who’ve left comments. You haven’t been many, but you are greatly appreciated, and your interjections always brought a smile to my face, knowing that, when so many of the people in my life consider me weird and obsessed, you understood why, and urged me on.

I’ll be back. Stronger. Wiser. Better prepared than ever before. But I need time.

Train hard, my friends. The blood, sweat and tears you shed is fuel for your journey. Burn it and blaze brightly so that the very stars are eclipsed by your accomplishments, so that the heavens quake before the might of man and the wonder of woman.

I will join you on my return…

Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for - in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it. - Ellen Goodman, 1941

I’ve never had a full-time job before, only ever part-time. My first two weeks in the office have come to an end…and wow. It is tiring. The early start needed to commute and get in on time, the long day with only a 30 minute lunch break, the rush-hour commute back…

Look, I know I’m making excuses. Majority of people in the world have life far worse than me, and I should be grateful. I will be. Just give me a bit of time to adapt!

I prepared for the first day like Batman - all variables were accounted for and nothing could stop me. After being smacked round the face with a well-needed dose of reality, I’m now looking more like a bedraggled Robin. My diet has gone to hell - not in terms of bad food, but in the sense that I haven’t been eating anywhere near as much as I have been. I will not have gained weight and, knowing my furious metabolism, I’ve probably lost a lot of weight. Further, all training aside from my Kung Fu has ceased. My body and mind have been sundered by the new routine, and I just haven’t been able to organise the time or muster the energy to go to the gym.

Again, excuses. Kick sand in my face. I deserve it.

The good news is that I am slowly adjusting to this new life as an office-based civil servant. I just need time to rethink my approach. I don’t have whole days to rest/eat/train anymore. I’ve got to get creative.

I’ve got a plan for the gym, but I am putting it on hold for now. I am due to move house by the end of June to a location that is much closer to my work. This will mean I will have much more time in the morning and evening to workout. In addition, it is much nearer a couple of gyms, further simplifying matters.

Until the move is completed, I will not be going to the gym. I will, however, still be training: both at Kung Fu and at home, where I shall make use of my knowledge of calisthenics and a pullup bar. Maybe I can build some mad monkey strength? I shall use the time to research and modify my diet so that it fits in with my new job. I’m hoping to filter out most supplements and…well, that’s for another blog.

I’ll make a brief May08 update post on Sunday (hopefully). We’ll see how badly my weight has been hit then. I’m hoping to keep above 170 Pounds…guess I’ll find out soon enough.

I’ve been bent, but I’m not broken. Not yet. I’ve just found one way of not completing my goals. Other options are there to make those ambitions reality. They just take time to find. And I will find one that works. Just watch this space.

All paid jobs absorb and degrade the mind - Aristotle

I’ve just got back from a session of High Intensity Interval Training at the gym and I feel sick. I think that means I’m doing it right. Many people get a sense of euphoria at the end of such a short, high-intensity workout. My body just screams a truth I’ve always known: I DON’T LIKE CARDIO!

Still, the aim of these sessions is to improve upon your last performance and, so far, I have been able to do that. I have built up to Level 10 (out of a possible 12) on the bike for my all-out sprints. From next week, I’ll start increasing the time of the sprints (currently 10 seconds). I can forsee my vomiting in the gym. A lot.

Of course, the reason I feel so sick today might be related to encroaching anxiety and not just the dizzying effects of repeated stationary sprints: I start my new job tommorrow.

It will be my first ever proper full-time job (having previously engaged only in part-time or agency work). I am more than a little nervous about starting, but I’m trying to look on the bright side. That is, I’ll have a guaranteed income for the first time in my life. Hurrah!

Tonight, I shall be preparing vast amounts of food, collated and sealed in a myriad of tupperware containers, ready so that I may continue to gorge on gargantuan amouts of edible matter for the purpose of bulking while in the office. Tommorrow, I shall be going to the gym at the crack of dawn, as opposed to my usual time of the afternoon, as it will be the only time I will be able to lift and still fulfil my evening Kung Fu training.

It’s a new day, a new season, a new me, and I’ll be damned if I use this opportunity as an excuse to slack or stop my training. Time to grow like never before, both in body, and as a person.

I’ll let you know how it goes. Wish me luck!

I saw the angel in the marble, and carved until I set him free. - Michelangelo

My seventh month of consistent weight training ended with the month of April…and progress is a little difficult to describe this time. Taking a week off training mid-month to recover (something I’ve now learnt is very important to do every 6-10 weeks) and changing programs mid-month mean that I don’t really have any specific lifting statistics to report. I will however make the following comments:

Weight: 170 Pounds / 12.2 Stone at end of March = 171 Pounds / 12.3 Stone at end of April

New Deadlift Best: 102.5KG / 225.5 Pounds

New Military Press Best: 45KG / 99 Pounds

Following Jason Ferruggia’s Mass-Building program has already yielded strength results. However, my weight continues to limp towards its future glory.

In April, I was consuming between 4700-5200 calories a day. After a month of such high-volume eating, I gained…a single pound.

Wow. In the last two months I’ve gained two pounds. A pound a month. Yeesh.

Weight progress is slow, and I’m beginning to wonder how I can possibly eat more / find more time to eat during the day to rectify this. I hear people who’ve been on/have completed bulks complaining about having to eat 3500 calories a day…

Rookies, you don’t know hardgaining like I know hardgaining.

Still, negativity wont help me, so this is my May plan to gain muscle:

1) Eat 5200-5500 calories a day.

2) Start taking Creatine.

2a) Drink LOTS of water.

3) Start another cycle of M-Stak (although the cycle I started last month didn’t really do anything I’d already bought two more cycles so I might as well use them - more on the effects, or lack thereof, of M-Stak in another blog)

4) Lift heavier weights (continue progress overload)

5) Recover as best I can (sleep well, perhaps get regular massages?)

If anyone has any ideas, tips, suggestions or advice on gaining weight I would be very interested and grateful to hear them. Bear in mind though that I don’t have a stomach, but a furnace - a hyper-metabolic melting pot where food is not digested, but seemingly erased from existence. My body flies in the face of accepted scientific law. It does not convert energy; rather, matter is negated.

The next four months will see the completion of the Introduction Phase of Jason Ferruggia’s Beginners Blast-Off progam. Hopefully at its end, and the end of the month, I shall have some brand new muscle to show for it.

Let’s go.

He who cannot rest, cannot work; he who cannot let go, cannot hold on; he who cannot find footing, cannot go forward. - Richard William Armour

I’ve been doing an awful lot of jumping kick training at Kung Fu recently as we’ve just got a new free-standing technique bag and, while I am enjoying that (and greatly improving my ability to both jump and jump kick) it has put a lot of pressure on my legs. That, and the fact that I’ve been stalling in a lot of my lifts, am feeling sore and stressed etc. means that I am taking the rest of the week off weight training (but not Kung Fu). I don’t like to think of myself as anything less than hardcore, but sometimes you’ve got to listen to your body rather than your ego.

In other news, I’ve purchased and have been reading Jason Ferruggia’s Muscle Gaining Secrets e-book (see here: http://www.biggerfasterquick.com/). I’m not one to usually buy such things, but I was having a moment of angst concerning my (perceived) weakness the other day and caved. It’s been interesting reading; has a lot of synergy with Bill’s Bare Minimum Training I tried at the beginning of the year.

At the moment, I don’t know whether to finish the month of April on the 5 x 5 Strength Program I’m currently on (it’s been six weeks) and then start Jason’s Beginner’s Blastoff 26 Week Program for Beginners, or to just launch straight into the Beginner’s Blastoff on Monday after my week off. If you have any thoughts, let me know.

Heck, if you just want to pop by and leave me a message, do so. It gets so lonely in here sometimes!

Finally…why can’t I find a gym with a power rack? It’s all ‘health’ clubs and spinning classes and a solitary smith machine if you’re lucky. Where are all the underground soldiers of iron paying their dues?!

Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats. - H. L. Mencken

This post will not be inspirational, motivational or indicative of progress. This post is a shameless, angsty rant, a vent of all the frustration I feel.

My workout on Monday was terrible. The gym was crowded, my workout fragmented, and I got precious little done. I was only able to complete my Dips and Squats, and I’ve re-set my squat at a much deloaded weight - to 70KG - so as to work on form and serious depth. To be fair, the squat thing worked out good. Despite the much reduced weight, the extra depth I was shooting for made the workout a lot harder. Good. Sometimes, ego/amount of weight needs to take a back seat to form/quality of work. However, I was unable to achieve anything else.

I said to myself that I would go in the next day and re-do the workout, properly, the way it was meant to be done. I went in today to do just that.

I should never have gone in.

If Monday’s workout was bad, today’s attempt at re-doing it was abominable. I had no energy, strength, focus…anything. I spent 20 minutes huffing and puffing at the Bench Press, barely managing to squeeze out 5 x 5 at just 60KG (I was meant to be increasing it to 67KG!) I then tried the Squat again. Got 2 reps and racked it. I had nothing to give. I was dead inside. I left there and then rather than carry on and get increasingly depressed at my ineptitude.

I’m trying to stay philosophical about things. I’ve only been weight training for just over 6 months, but big strength and build gains often don’t come about until after 6 years of training. It’s a long-term thing, I know this, and I’m no stranger to working towards goals over a long period of time, but…

…damn it, I am really feeling weak. I look at all the physiques of guys on this site. From muscular behemoths to athletic powerhouses to even the 150 pound skinny pretty-boys with six-packs, everyone seems to be in better shape/stronger than me. Today I wanted to scream "Shall I just go and pick up the pink dumbbells?!" at my body. Weakling, worthless thing. A long, stretchy streak of very-white nothing.

I push hard, I do all the big compound lifts, strive for good form with heavy weight, eat lots of healthy food etc., but all I seem capable of doing in these last couple of weeks is hitting plateaus. It can’t be because I’m overtraining: I only go in three days a week for no more than 45 minutes at a time. Why, oh why can’t my body reflect my desire.

The mind is willing, but the flesh is weak.

<pause for breath>

Okay…that feels better. I’m not expecting anyone to hold my hand and tell me I’m a special and unique snowflake, I just needed to vent. I’m going in tommorrow to attack Workout B. With the negativity out of my system, I should perform better. Here’s to turning this run of bad training around with some serious gains.

The fury of a weak man shall fuel his transformation into a titan. All he needs, is time.

If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do…the body is never tired if the mind is not tired. - General George S. Patton

Six months - one half a year - of consistent weight training and my first month of Starting Strength have been completed. Let’s take a look at where this last month has led me:

[Weights listed are those used for 5 sets of 5 reps. Results listed as Beginning of Starting Strength (Beginning of March) = End of March]

Weight: 12.1 Stone / 169 Pounds = 12.2 Stone / 170 Pounds

Squat: 60KG/132 Pounds = 100KG/220 Pounds (+40KG/88 Pounds)

Bench Press: 40KG/88 Pounds = 62.5KG/137.5 Pounds (+22.5kg/49.5 Pounds)

Bent-Over Row: 40KG/88 Pounds = 67.5KG/148.5 Pounds (+27.5KG/60.5 Pounds)

Military Press: 12.5KG/27.5 Pounds = 42.5KG/93.5 Pounds (+30KG/66 Pounds)

Deadlift: 20KG/44 Pounds = 75KG/165 Pounds (+55KG/121 Pounds)

Dip/Chinup/Pullup progression was abandoned for the first month, to let me body get used to the workload of the other big exercises. Apart from that, I’m pleased with my progress. I’ve added some serious weight to all of the big lifts (even after taking into account that 10KG/22 Pounds of all those gains was realising that the bar weighed 10KG/22 Pounds itself…). Sadly, my weight hasn’t responded as well, but then this program is designed to foster strength, and it is doing just that. I just need to fiddle with my diet some more and, hopefully, the size gains will come as well.

To help with this, I’ve started a cycle of Universal Nutrition’s Animal M-Stak. I’ll let you know effect, if any, it has and what I thought about it after the three week cycle closes.

As we enter April, I shall be pursuing Starting Strength even harder. I have re-incorporated the Dips/Pullups/Chinups into the program again, and will work to progress with them along with the other exercises.

Starting weights are: Dips = 10KG/22 Pounds. Chinups/Pullups = Bodyweight.

Progress picture for March is up…and is disappointing. Grrr…maybe one day I’ll look as strong as I feel and know I am.

Anyway, enough with the negativity. April is going to see even greater gains in my strength and, with a rejigged diet and M-Stak boosting my body, my size will increase as well.

This is my prediction; now to do what I need to do to make it so.

Can anyone explain to me what is going on with Bodyspace?

Firstly, despite having 18 (well, now 19) entries in my BodyBlog, they are not showing up on my Bodyspace page. The BodyBlog box instead says that no blogs have been entered (although you can still acess them at the side panel)

Secondly, I have tried to update my lifting stats several times today, but each time my detailed progress page/records/charts fail to register them. Details I’ve entered from today (March 26th) are not being tallied or showing up.

What on earth is going on? I haven’t changed any of my settings. The internet’s gone mad with power!

Any help, thoughts or suggestions, please leave a comment or get in touch. Many thanks.

Drunken Panda

(No quote for this: when the problem clears up, and I hope it will, I shall delete this blog entry)

If we attend continually and promptly to the little that we can do, we shall ere long be surprised to find how little remains that we cannot do. - Samuel Butler

DO YOU WANT THE STRENGTH OF A PANDA?

HOW ABOUT THE RAGING, TREMBLING STRENGTH OF A DRUNKEN PANDA?

THE DRUNKEN DYNAMO PANDA POWER SYSTEM ™ CAN ADD AS MUCH AS 10KG - THAT’S OVER 20 POUNDS! - TO ALL YOUR MAJOR LIFTS OVER NIGHT!

FOR AS LITTLE AS $600 - A MERE PITTANCE TO STOP BEING A TEETOTAL SACK OF SOGGY BISCUITS AND GAIN FABULOUS, INSTANTANEOUS STRENGTH GAINS - YOU CAN BECOME THE HERCULEAN BEAR-LIKE ALCOHOLIC OF BIBLICAL MYTH…FOR REAL!

Okay, okay…relax. I’m not actually a charismatic but delusional internet fitness guru selling (by means of questioning your manhood and comparing your current physical capabilites to anecdotal evidence of strength suggested by creatures of a completely different genus and musculature) very simple exercise tips and techniques for a ludicrous amount of cash.

Rather, I found out the other day at the gym that the barbells there weigh 10KG/22 Pounds by themselves. Up until now I have only counted the weight of the plates I have loaded onto the barbell. This means that I have been lifting 10KG more than I realise in all my main lifts - I have, in a way, increased all my lifts by 10KG/22 Pounds…instantly!

I have adjusted my lifting progress stats accordingly, taking the last stat input and increasing the amount lifted by 22 pounds. This should explain why there is a sudden spike in all my lifts today.

Just goes to show that we are all a lot stronger than we think we are. Also, never be afraid to ask seemingly silly questions in the gym. The answers could just make you a lot stronger!

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can be great. - Mark Twain

(Thanks to LuckeyStoke for the quote.)

Today has been a good day.

Firstly, I put in some serious training at the gym. Man, I felt strong. A large part of this was to do with a guy called Tony. He’s a guy in late middle-age who asked if he could work in with me with my squats. Having him there, looking over me, encouraging me, offering me kind words (’you’ve got strong legs, you’re almost up to two plates a side’) and helpful advice etc. really made a difference to my output. I was pushing 72.5KG/159.5 Pounds for 5 x 5 and felt really secure with that weight. I’d been worried about my form, so when he offered comments like ‘you’ve got good technique, you pause at the bottom before shooting up’ and ‘you’re hitting a good depth’, it really spurred me on and made me believe in myself.

The ‘old’ guy was squatting just over 90KG/198 Pounds for 5 x 10 by the way - I’ve got a lot of work to do to match that! One day soon, though. Truely inspiring!

Secondly, today I was offered a new job! Working in the local council’s Housing Department, the job starts late April/early May, depending on (and assuming if) my references come back okay (which I’m sure they will). I’ll have more money than I’ve ever had before in my life! (That’s not to say it’s a lot of money, just more than before). Maybe I should check out some high-end supplements…!

I’m set to do 75KG/165 Pound Squats for 5 x 5 on Monday. Look out Tony, because I’m coming after you!