People of the Forest pee in my cup, PLEASE!
"Ever received a gift bearing an origination from the Indonesian
island of Sumatra?" I was asked this question as soon as I walked into my probation officer’s office today! What the…..!!! Why would he ask me, of all people, this question!? "Why, yes! Yes, I have as a matter of fact!" I said.
Probation officer: "Are you aware that orangutans live only on the islands of Borneo and
Sumatra?"
What I think:**It’s getting really weird up in here! Why is he talking about this? I wonder if I should tell him his fly is down.**
What I say: "Yes, they and the gibbon are the only apes found outside of Africa. The orangutans of Borneo can commonly be found skulking about on the ground, but the orangutans of Sumatra never venture on the ground!"
Probation Officer: "Why do you think that is?"
What I think: **"Oh man….he must know I used orangutan urine I got from the zoo for that drug test last week! He is so smart! I’m not telling him about the fly."**
What I say: "Because tigers prowl the grounds of Sumatra, but they are not found in Borneo!!"
HAHAAA! In your face, probation officer!! I bet he thought I didn’t know that! BTW…I , DanicaX, do NOT talk like that!….Plus I ain’t that smart….Oh, but I think some people may know who DOES talk like that and has a computer brain!!
Anyways, I did get these flowers (Sumatra Lilies) and they are totally awesome! I have to show them off here b/c nobody has been over to my house so I can show them off. I thought about taking my Sumatra Lilies on a nice walk around the neighborhood so people would ask about them…."Oh, these old things?…..Oh, I just got these flowers sent to me. They are Sumatra Lilies and are pretty much the best flower ever (Yes! Like in a Napoleon Dynamite-ish way!)." "Oh, well why are you walking around with them? And were those moon boots you were lunging around in yesterday?"
Here are those rockin’ Lilies!!!!
March 30, 2008 at 7:15 pm
Are you sure those aren’t poppies from Columbia???? Hmmmmmm????
March 30, 2008 at 7:17 pm
Nice lillies, but that dang monkey is still trying to get his five minutes of fame. I’m glad you posted again…been waiting for your next blog. They keep me smiling. Hope you are well
March 30, 2008 at 7:17 pm
Oh BTW I forgot to tell you I’m not selling you anymore orangutan pee if your probation officer is suspicious.
March 30, 2008 at 7:24 pm
interesting writing none the less
March 30, 2008 at 7:57 pm
Nice flowers. I once got lead coated chocolates from china…I think the person who sent them was trying to tell me something…hmmmm…
March 30, 2008 at 8:30 pm
BEAUTIFUL (the flowers, not the story
)… looks like monkey’s preparing to jank it, though!
Totally didn’t get a chance to watch "I Know My Kid’s a Star" this week yet! Pesky friends and their weddings and such…
March 30, 2008 at 9:33 pm
FYI, 250 Sumatran tigers left in the wild!! I counted them. For another cool Sumatran animal, check out the Sumatran rhino! I’ve been on a real rhino researching kick lately. I don’t know why that is.
Pixi, yes there is a monkey preparing to jack it… Wait, what did you say? Jank it. Ohhhhhh!!!
Those flowers do look nice! I can’t wait to see when the other buds open. No smoking those, DX!
March 30, 2008 at 9:37 pm
Oh, and remind me to tell you a story about urine and beating a drug test!
March 30, 2008 at 11:14 pm
well, it is late but I am actually posting on your blog, not nomadeks! LOL…Awesome flowers! watch out for Bryan and KM with the monkey spanking..i mean yanking…going on!
March 31, 2008 at 9:25 am
Hey, there is nothing wrong with Monkey Spanking!! Especially with the smell of Sumatran Lillies in the air!
P.S. Whats wrong with posting on my blog?? It is quite uninformative you know! lol.
April 1, 2008 at 3:02 am
I bet you deserved them…the lillies that is…
April 1, 2008 at 10:00 am
I hate it when people don’t tell me when my fly is down!!!
April 1, 2008 at 4:27 pm
Those flowers are awesome. Hey Danica don’t look now but you have some strange characters commenting on your blog. Especially that King Marmoset and BryanGee character. Watch out for those guys!
April 2, 2008 at 8:32 am
Flowers are gorgeous! Monkey looks a little ill, though. You should watch him so he doesn’t eat the flowers. My cat likes to do that, stupid cat.
April 2, 2008 at 3:32 pm
AWESOME FLOWERS !!! kinda like what i have in my yard, no clue what they are ,
LOLLOLO i just tak etons of pics,
SUMMER is coming BACK TO CT !!!!!!!!