Clos3r2myDr33ms’s BodyBlog

Iiiitt’s Friiidaaayyy!! Here goes another fun filled weekend. What makes this one different than all the others of this summer? Well, i’m going to stick to eating clean lol. Last week it dawned on me that i’ve been maintaining these past few months and that definately was not the plan. I would do so well during the week and on the weekend I would eat enough to fuel a small army; definately not conducive to losing a pound or two a week. So now i’m cracking down so I can meet my end of the year goal of losing 50 lbs.

They say the best way to reach your destination is to map out your route to getting there so here’s what i’m going to do to steer clear of the food bonanza this labor day weekend:

1. Pack my own food in advance and bring it with me wherever I go

2. Carry that oh so friendly "crap pushers" letter by Chickentuna with me in my purse lol!

3. Drink lots of water so I don’t mistake hunger for thirst

4. Wear some hella tight jeans so I won’t forget why i’m doing this in the first place!

 I know some people would say taking a day off is fine…but for me, atleast right now, it’s not. I have found so many holidays to take off it’s ridiculous! And for me, a holiday lasts about 2-3 days. People always speculate about when is a good time to start eating right. Well, the answer is RIGHT NOW. If you wait, just think about how many holidays there are. Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, Valentines Day, St.Patrick’s Day, Easter…I mean, you can find a reason to eat junk all the time if you think about it. But how do you feel afterwards? I know for me, after I gorge myself I feel ill…and not just physically, but psychologically appalled. Then the next day when the leftovers are looking at me I figure, well…since it’s still here, I might as well finish it. Well, not anymore. Last time there was leftover rubbish in the fridge I threw it out the next morning. Hubby isn’t going to sit around eating it and I know for damn sure I don’t want 3000 calories sitting on my behind. Think about where you want to be and then look at what you’re about to throw down on…will it bring you closer to your dreams or farther away from them?

For the most part this summer i’ve been maintaining. One of my good bodyspace friends suggested that I take a look at what triggers me to go off diet or training and go from there. Sooo, maybe my ramblings will bring some insight. When I first began this fitness quest I had a particular goal date. I was pushing as hard as I could with my diet and exercise to see how far it would take me by that one day. Well, that day has come and gone and so has my mojo. Everyone around me has been telling me how good I look nowadays and how they can tell i’ve been working out and although I can see a difference; I am still aware I have a ways to go. Yet and still, I haven’t been making moves to go forward. I’m taking in a lot of advice and I suppose i’m at a crossroads. Some say this lifestyle is extreme and I should do something I can live with. I tell them, "I can’t have watermelon!!" and the answer "What kind of diet won’t let you have watermelon? It’s fruit!". Well….if I want to be super lean watermelon isn’t exactly on the agenda at the moment but on the other hand I do need to ask myself where exactly is it that I want to go with this? What reasons do I have to put all my efforts towards leaning out? I can’t say that it’s to look good for my husband because he was still attracted to me when I was more uhh…soft. It’s not for swimsuit season because fall is quickly coming up and you don’t need a six pack to wear a sweater. The thought of competing next year has crossed my mind but thats soo far away! Hmm…

I know exactly what triggers me to go off my diet! During the week I eat well and train as usual but on the weekend we go out with friends (and no one I know is into this lifestyle) and I "forget" all about what i’m striving towards and gobble up pizza, cake, and other nonsense. By saturday night i’m pretty disgusted with myself but figure I might as well finish up the leftovers and begin again on monday. Sound familiar fellow chronic dieters? Monday just sounds like a good time to start something over lol. So here I am, up late on a sunday night contemplating what exactly will make this monday different.

There is one thing that everyone that has lost weight says that you should do that I haven’t…well, not for the second time. After I lost about 25 lbs I went out and got some new outfits. Now at 35 lbs lost my clothes are baggy once more but I haven’t wanted to go shopping again. I guess i’m afraid that (like in the past) I will gain the weight back and then i’ll have an even wider variety of sizes hanging out in my closet. But, with me holding on to clothes that are too big am I really saying "what if?" or "when the time comes?". I’ve got to stop doing this!!

 Alright, course of action decided: Since I now fit all of the "goal" outfits I once set out for myself, it’s time to buy a new one (or two or three)! That will be something tangible that I have to work towards and I can try it on every week to see if i’m closer to being able to wear it…and look good lol. This has been a particularly long bout of rambling but it’s definately helped me to sort some things out. Hooray for bodyspace!

I had my second meal of the day at 5 in the afternoon and this had a DRAMATIC effect on my energy for todays workout. Now I see why people say not to skip meals lol. I could list a few excuses but I know that honestly, I should have just planned ahead. I bought a pack of EAS bars so that I can throw them in my purse when I know i’ll be out and about for a few hours. I have no problem driving right past fast food restaurants, it’s just that after all that time of not eating I want to come home and either take a nap, or eat enough to make up for meals lost. Neither of which is really an option. Today was a lesson learned.