Clos3r2myDr33ms’s BodyBlog

I flip through muscle and fitness magazine reading the articles and occassionally reading the ads and can’t help but wonder…is there an easier way?! My mind tells me that there is no other way to be fit and have a bangin body without putting in the work and taking time, but all the time you hear about quick and easy weightloss. Ads show transformations boasting claims like, "I lost 20 lbs in 6 weeks!" or "Gain muscle quickly!" and a person going from drab to fab on the page. Is losing 1-2 lbs a week really all one should expect? Am I really progressing at a "healthy" pace or is that a nice way of saying that i’m taking the slow boat to China? I’m going to try to be positive and believe that a pound lost is one less that i’ll be wearing on my figure. Perhaps i’ve been watching too much of The Biggest Loser lol.

I enjoy overcoming personal limitations. Things that I thought i’d never do, i’m doing. Goals that I never thought i’d achieve, i’m achieving. I’m also surprising close family members with my transformation on a daily basis, and this gives me a little kick too. I used to be one of the people that shows up to the gym for the first couple weeks of the new year and then gives up on themselves. I used to be one of the people that lost a couple pounds, got scared of experiencing something new, and returned to the familiar.

Every moment of every day I have to think about the decisions i’m making to keep from returning to what used to comfort me. I have to think, before I put something in my mouth "how will this benefit me? is this fuel for my body or am I trying to comfort myself with this?". I’m proud of myself for taking strides in the right direction because there was a time when I thought nothing of tossing back half a bag of dove chocolates. This is also the first time I have worked out in tandem with a diet (excuse me, healthy way of eating). I set out to complete cardio and strength training each day and sometimes that is no easy feat! I continue to do it though, because I love the results. I love feeling strong and in control. In a world where so many things are anything but, I think that we all have to take some time to focus on what we do have a hand in.

Today I bought my first set of weights. I figured I would go with dial-a-weights so that I could get a great deal of use out of one pair. You wouldn’t believe how giddy I was at the register!! The small man behind the counter gasped as he tried to lift them "My, these are heavy!" he said. I just smiled with satisfaction as I picked up each box to place in front of him to scan. Oh, the small joys in life.

I am so glad to have stumbled upon bodybuilding.com and all of you who are a part of bodyspace. I am the only one in my family who is actively pursuing an active, healthy, lifestyle. Although I know i’m not backing down from my goals for anyone, I privately admit that it bothers me that my transformation into the woman I want to be is causing such an uproar among those closest to me. I know that they all mean well and care deeply about my well-being but there comes a point where I have to do things for me and only I know what really makes me happy. Comments such as, "I like you just the way you are," or "You know that it isn’t proven that drinking a gallon of water does anything good for you," or "Don’t turn anorexic! We’ll have to send you to a clinic," get to me every now and again. I laugh in the moment but on the inside I still wonder why they could even verbalize these thoughts. In the past, comments like that would’ve led to an argument immediately but i’m past that. I can’t control how others feel about what i’m doing, nor can I make anyone around me want better for themselves, but I can decide how i’m going to respond to outside influences. I can decide where I want to go, how far i’m going to take this. I can decide the when and the how. I can decide that it’s time for me.