Civilrights1’s BodyBlog

Here, there, everywhere…in the mind that is. So I am doing ok with my eating, working out (Huummm), just trying to stay positive (Hard than working out itself!), and simply living. I don’t know people. One day at a time is all I can really say! I feel like I am stuck at a stand still. Being made to work where I am.

I went to the store today to try on some jeans. Just a month ago I was a size 24, now the jeans I tried on today were a size 20! Whoooowooo! But I must remain calm and just keep going! I know I can do it. Its hard, its boring, blah, blah…but it has to be done right?

…ok so last time I typed I fell off the wagon, but I was still losing weight, well I have become the wagon. Yes people all of the weight I lost, I gained it all back and then more. So its official I am not 274lbs. Yes, fast food, stressfully hated job with an evil boss, stress of school, and no recreational activity (if you know what I mean, looonnnggg ttiimmee) equals weight gain. BIG TIME!!! But, I won’t give up, I won’t quit. Working on an attack plan to make this new healthy life style Permanente. So send me some encouragement, sure could use it.

…I fell so far off the band wagon, its a shame but the crazy thing is….I am still losing weight…I think its stress. Ok, I thought I would be able to meet my goal but I might just a bit short. LOL its all good though. Some how I will manage to get back in the gym….somebody pray a good prayer for me.

People how many of you have went through a time period (A month ) where you just could not get your eating under control, I have and as a matter of fact; I am going through it right now. This month I am calling it "March Madness" because the stuff I have been eating is just sheer madness! Cookies, cakes, donuts, you name it! But more than anything I have been eating and craving….CHOCOLATE! The very dessert that makes me weak. LOL, After I eat chocolate, I get such a happy feeling and all is right with the world again. Now I have to honestly say that this is the only month were my cravings were this high but maybe its tied to the stress I have at work and school. Maybe its tied to sex…;-) or lack of….but we are not going to go there. Until the next episode….

ok, days like this I just want to go home, curl up on my sofa, with a good movie….and a philly chicken sandwhich and 6 lemon pepper wings.. LOL!! Alright, I know I ain’t right but man this thing is hard. I do not feel like going to the gym today. But, Guess what? I am going anyway, you know why because I don’t want to. Makes sense right? Listen all the things I dont feel like doing are the things I need to do and that will benefit me. The very things I want to do are the things that sometimes get me in trouble. So motto for today: "Do what you don’t want to do and reap the rewards"

Came out of the darkness since my last post and got serious and started kicking my own butt. Alot has changed since January. I am soooo excited, but I am not ready to show off my progress pics yet, I mean you can truly see the difference. Whoopie!! I have lost 2 pants sizes since the beginning of January (Size 24 and 22) and I am halfway out of my size 20 pants. I tried on a old pair of 18’s and they were tight but dammit I got in them! LOL So people I will make my bikini goal this summer. WATCH ME WORK!! To be continued…

Now I see the root of my problem. Whenever I get bored or lonely (which is why I try to stay busy) I eat. My life is fill with things to do but when its all said and done and there is quietness…..I am bored and lonely. Huummmm then all kinds of thought start running through my head. I know what I need and want but will that sovle my bored and loneliness. Can’t anyone relate?

So I decided today that I would cancel all of my internet memberships (Facebook,Myspace, etc..) and the ones I am going to keep I decided to delete all of the pictures. I am tired of staring at a image I am not happy with so while I am doing something about it, I don’t want to see these pics at least for a minute. I know some people say this is what motivates you to lose weight but not me. It’s just dam depressing. So here goes nothing.

I haven’t posted in a minute 1.) Being lazy 2.) Being busy with work and school (Class 2010…Whoooo!) and 3.) Shame. Yes, I was to ashamed to post because I didn’t do what I said I was going to do for a number of reasons but for real….I just didn’t feel like it. Yep, I already know what you are thinking. Typical….but I thought I would try a new approach. It’s called the, “take one day at a time” approach. This weight is not coming off fast anytime soon so I might as well take my time getting it off. Yea, I know, I was supposed to do this in the first place. However, I am only human. You know how it is, right? It’s like how at the beginning of the year everyone rushes to the gym to start the New Year resolution to lose weight and fall off the band wagon by February or March. By the way, that was me many times over, LOL. This time I have decided to start early and start at the bottom, I mean the very bottom, and that means dealing with the mind and spirit. I want to know why I crave certain foods, why certain foods lift my spirits when I am sad, and how food works in my system; you know the whole relationship I have with it. You know how we women are…Let’s talk about it. LMAO 

But in all seriousness I want to be about it as well. So, now what I have started doing is walking. Whether it’s parking far away when I go shopping, walking around at work, walking at my apartment complex, just moving. My current size pants are falling off of me, I mean I can take them off without unzipping them. (Yes, I am excited) However, I am just going to remain calm and just keep doing what I am doing. As far as food goes, I still eat sweets, but I have slowly reduced the amount I eat, and have started substituting them for fruit and I have cut down on the sugar, in which, I don’t eat white sugar, but I have always consumed Splenda. My vegetable intake has increased and I only eat fish, chicken, turkey and every once in while lean red meats but not often. I have started back lifting weight because I am dealing with a bad knee and a pulled muscle in my back. So, as you can see I have a lot of work to do but it will get done all in due time.

OK, celebrated my birthday last Friday and I had a ball! Didn’t party to hard but I had fun! 

Now I did as we all do…Yep…I started reflecting on my life (Weight), Career (Weight), Family (Weight), Friends (Weight)…and my WEIGHT. See my point. So tomorrow I am starting something different, some of you may not agree and some of you may congratulate me. But I have decided to do a food delivery/pick-up service called, “Fresh-N-Fit Cuisine” here in Atlanta. I am doing this not as a quick weight lose but for different reasons. 1.) I really don’t have time or energy to cook. I have tried the cooking everything on Sunday for the whole week and freezing it kind of thing, but after awhile I don’t have time for that and a lot of times I end up wasting a lot of food. 2.) I am young (:-) and single with no kids so I can afford to do this, LOL and 3.) I like variety, as a matter of fact I support it very much and on this company’s menu they have a variety of meals to choose from. I have heard good things about this company and have seen the results for other people that have tried it, so why not try it. I am going to do this for 30 days (you know a trial period) I will keep up guys updated.