Cashlax20’s BodyBlog

… i decided that jealousy is the thing that gets me more motivated than anything.

Let us say, for example, you and a group of friends are watching a movie and a dude with a rediculosly good body pops on screen. Girls drool.. and gasp orgrunt or whatever girls do. ….. I immediatly want to pick something up and set it down repeatedly so i can work out right then.

It is terribly narsasistic, but i want people to drool over my body. I don’t workout to be healthier, or stronger or whatever. I want people to drool when i take my shirt off.

SO: I am jealous of the people that get drooled over. It keeps me motivated. I literally texted a friend of mine who is a girl today and asked her to explain to me how hot six packs are. I then went to the gym and had the best workout of my entire life? Awesome.

I’ve been working pretty hard in the gym and sticking to my diet really really closely. At first I was just dropping weight super quick, and now it’s almost as though I have platuaed as far as the numbers on the scale go.

I keep looking and feeling leaner though which is motvation enough to keep going.

It’s kind of weird, it seems like the fat is dissapearing in a wave kind of motion. My face lost a little i think, and then my shoulders and my chest is coming along, and it’s slowly working it’s way down toward my stomach….

Ugh.. I WILL WILL WILL get my six pack by haloween. I’m about to post some update pictures. Let me know if you can see the difference after a month of leaning out.

… animal cuts is crazy. I’m on day 2 of my first cutting cycle ever. I have 8 weeks of hell. Yesterday was fun though. I was sweating like a pig all day and then i got to the gym and it was nutz. You can just feel this stuff coursing through your body. Bueno!

…. is a frustrating body group. Monday’s are my chest day and i find that i am concentrating so hard on flexing my chest during my excercises that I over think it, and i will roll my shoulders forward and then push with my shoulders weirdly.

I am not sure if that makes sense, but, i am considering hiring the personal trainer i see everdya at the gym for a day just so he can kind of re-train me in the chestial area. haha. It is just annoying feeling myself do something that i don’t wanna do! I’m learning though, i will figure it out or learn something new.

… It’s so f-ing hard to resist. Last night i had a pretty killer shoulders and abs day. Ate perfectly the whole day, and then was going over to a friends house to have a few people over. I assumed "having a few people over" meant me, him, his wife and maybe a couple others. That being said, i left the gym dropped by the store, got a whole wheat bagel, some OJ and some cottage cheese. Ate it all. haha

We are hanging out and the god damn plauge shows up ready to party. I kept telling myself i was not going to drink, i was determined to not do it so i could just have a good day, week whatever. At 10 i went down and bought a steak at safeway, cooked it and ate it in the middle of the party (still wearing my gym clothes) and was doing great.

The only good news that came of this was that I got this one hot girls number, while smelling like the inside of a gym shoe, while wearing my gym clothes. Today my gym clothes were; Royal blue shorts, and a grave digger T-shirt. hahaha. Anywho, I find that alcohol is my one weakness when it comes to my diet. It sucks because it is so good…
All of the sudden i was standing in a group of people all drinking talking and having fun and suddenly i also had a beer. SHIT!! i was doing so good. One turned into 5 and then i was on a mission to get a solid buzz. Needless to say, I got it. But what the hell, I was doing so well.

…I have a deep rooted fear that my left shoulder and my right shoulder are developiing differently due to me working them out incorrectly or differently. To counteract this, last week I went way low weight for the first few sets of my shoulder exercises just to make sure my form was good and i was doing everything exactly the same with each shoulder.

This fear comes from my in-ability to flex my left, trap i guess. With my right side i can kind of pull my shoulder blade back and drop my shoulder into the socket which in-turn flexes my trap up and makes it look HUGE. The left side of my body, WILL NOT, do this. It’s entirely frusturating because it sets off a chain reaction. I think my left trap is not getting worked out, or my shoulders are developing different. Any suggestions about my strange problem?

… I was in a mood yesterday after my workout. Obviously that would make me want to post on facebook about how annoyed i was and how badly i needed a workout partner. A couple of buddies of mine from high school were all into working out with me 4 days a week. We’ll see if they can keep up. If they aren’t motivated and they just lollygag around, it will annoy me. Quickly. So i suppose we will see how that goes.

I know I had something else to say but now i forget. I’ll just throw out my usual thoughts; I wish results were quicker, I hope that I am being intense enough, today I am going to destroy my legs.

Monday is my chest day… no matter how hard and heavy i was pushing. I could not get a pump. It made me so f-ing angry.

I love the feel of whatever muscle group your working feeling torn up and huge after you lift. However today, it would not happen? Does anyone else have days like those?

Secondly, i need a work out partner. I just need one who is going to push me and be as intense as i am. and dedicated. I’m at the gym 5 days a week. Having a spot and someone to help me with forced reps would be awesome.