The Chronicles of “B”

before I transformed myself into "B"….Hard core Mutha and zombie slayer, through hard work and exercise and partaking in the sacred "clean foods’ of the muscle Gods, I was just plain old Bryan.  Smoker of the chronic and indulger of fermented hops and barley. 

An unfortunate blow to the head a few years ago and the subsequent brain swelling that followed that blow have erased a lot of the memories I have of that Bryan fellow.  The strange thing is….I seem to retain a lot of the really bad memories while the good memories seem to elude me.   Thanks to my friends and family I have been able to recover some of those memories while some will likely remain lost to me forever.

The past 24 hours I have taken a walk down memory lane thanks to a couple of really good friends whom I met last night at a local drinking establishment.  We hoisted a few pitchers of our favorite fermented beverage and they helped me re-live my teenage years and young adulthood. 

What really struck me strange was how their perception of me and my perception of me differed.  I had always thought of myself as just a typical crazy ass teenager but these guys, and apparently many of the rest of our gang, nearly worshiped the ground I walked on.  According to them I am nearly a living legend.

Now I realize that the task of saving the world from being over run by zombie hoards has fallen on my shoulders along with my ally King Marmoset of Marmosettia.  But, even with that I have never thought of myself as a living legend.  Seems I was wrong.

As we drank of the fermented hops and barley they weaved many an incredible tale of my outlandish exploits.  To them I am Bryan….that crazy Mo Fo who leapt off the top of the Power House at Power Dam into a small retaining pool that was surrounded by cement.  IN THE DARK!!  It was a leap that should have resulted in my untimely demise and yet I lived to do it again just a few short days later.  To put it into perspective that would be the equivalent of a normal person jumping from the top of a telephone pole into a bucket of water blindfolded, living to tell of it, and then doing it again just for the hell of it. 

This was a memory that was previously lost to me but as they spun the yarn the memory came suddenly rushing back.  To this very day tales of my insane exploits are being talked about around the campfires throughout the land of Shitholeville and the surrounding kingdoms. 

Another incident that impressed my beer swilling buddies was the time I joined in a pickup football game with a bunch of the cast offs and rejects of our little realm against what amounted to our starting HS football team and annihilated them.  As they tell it I was practically a one man team so great were my skills that day and all my cast off friends bask in the glow of my greatness for that one brief shinning moment while our opponents tore at their clothes and skin in anguish over our overwhelming victory.

We re-lived the time we were drunk and I took a wiss in Chuck Teegarden’s boot as he stood abreast of me wissing.  Everyone knew I was pissing on Chuck’s leg….well….except for Chuck.  Great was his embarrassment when he found out the joke I had pulled on him.  Even though this happened  many many years ago the anger still stays inside of him at the mention of the pissing incident. 

I must say I was totally taken back, and extremely flattered, by my friends perceptions of me as a young slayer in training.  They spoke of my exploits with much gusto and laughter and here I just thought I was that crazy ass stoner kid that was just like every other crazy ass stoner kid.  Sometimes it’s really nice to take a trip down memory lane.  I must say though I am very gleeful that I lived though it and became the great slayer you know as "B"!!

Till next time my friends….Lift Long and Prosper!!!

"B"  Aka…Bryan          

This entry was posted on Saturday, March 22nd, 2008 at 5:32 pm and is filed under Training. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.