The Chronicles of “B”

For like the 3rd night in a row I have been having a terrible time sleeping.  I just can’t seem to get comfortable and when I finally do get to sleep it’s just for short periods and then I wake up and can’t fall back asleep.  It’s very frustrating.  I know muscle does not grow in the gym….it grows when we sleep and I’m not getting any.  It didn’t help matters that I had a splitting headache last night.  I don’t often get headaches but when I do they are of the eye popping variety.  I hate taking any kind of medication because of it’s affects on the liver so I usually just try to sleep off the pain but last night I ended up taking some pain medication.

I’m seriously thinking about taking some melatonin to see if that will help.  I’ve used it before with some pretty good results. 

Another weird thing is during the short periods of time that I do sleep I’m having really weird off the wall dreams and they are really vivid and in color.  I mean I’m like right there.  It’s really kind of awesome in a way.  I had a dream the other night that I could fly and it was the most incredible feeling ever.  I could actually feel myself getting lighter than air and then just felt myself lift off from the ground and gracefully soar into the sky.  It was awesome!!! 

My wife is kind of into all kinds of spiritual things and she says she thinks I was astral projecting.  In other words I had left my body and was actually zipping around.  Just my spirit!  Don’t know if I buy into that theory or not!  LOL!!!  At any rate it was still pretty cool.

The training is going really well.  I am so excited to see the changes taking place in my body.  There is a big full length mirror on the back of my bedroom door and when I first get up and crawl out of bed I see myself in all my naked glory in that mirror.  I used to find it kind of repulsive but now I’m really starting to like it and even linger there for a moment admiring the view.  LOL!!  My wife tells me all the time to quit flexing and admiring myself.  I tell her, "I look so good I almost hate to cover it up with clothes." 

Anyway!  Till next time….Lift Long and Prosper!!

"B" 

Well I went back to the gym tonight for quad night but figured I’d get my moneys worth tonight so I did my back too.  Tomorrow is usually back day but I thought I’d switch things up a little bit and hit it tonight and tomorrow I’ll just do some cardio.

Like my Wonder Twin Pixi I decided to go sleeveless tonight and was really shocked to see I had the biggest arms of anyone in the gym.  That was pretty cool. 

Zach the personal trainer came up to me to talk again tonight…or should I say…bother me.  I was loading the bar to do some deads and he came up and offered to help me put some plates on.  I asked him if he had a step and he just give me this stupid blank stare.  Ahhhh why do you need a step he asked.  

"To do deadlifts so I can get the full range of motion."

"Oh," same blank stare.  The he did something I absolutely hate.  He put his hands around my arm and squeezes and says, "Damn dude you got some huge ass arms there."  Well I love the compliment but I hate it when a stranger…especially a guy, puts his paws on me.  I bit my lip this time though and just mumbled thanks.  What a dill hole!!!  LOL!!  He continued to annoy me for another 5 minutes or so going on and on about how big I was and bla, bla, bla.  He even called me a big Mutha F-er!  What a potty mouth!  LOL!!  Usually I would enjoy the compliments but this guy is like a mosquito buzzing in you ear and anyway he is just trying to make up for the bad first impression he made.  I just wanted him to go away.  Finally he had a client come in and he left me alone.

Had an awesome workout in spite of PT Zach!  The weights still aren’t up to where they should be….especially compared to some of you other monsters but they’re getting up there.

I squatted with 170 lbs tonight and I’m going for 200 plus in the next couple of weeks…I hope!  I only deadlifted 130 but I’m going slow with my lower back….I can’t afford to pop anything.  I’m upping my poundages each week though and I’ll soon be up there lifting with the monsters like Mike Myers!!!  LOL!! 

Anyway I’m starting to like this gym a little better and I’m even thinking about going a little more often.  I still love the solitude of my garage gym though.

Well that’s it for tonight folks!  Till next time……

Lift Long and Prosper!!

Everyone has at least one.  You know, the one memory in their life that really touched them so deeply that they will never forget where they were when it happened.  You know what I mean…an historical event such as the day the Space Shuttle exploded or 911 and the Twin Towers. 

I have several that sticks out in my mind.  One would be the night John Lennon was shot. It was on a Monday night and I was watching the Miami Dolphins on Monday Night Football when Howard Cosell gave us the news.  I remember I sat and actually had tears rolling down my cheeks. 

The one that will forever be burned into my memory though is the day President Kennedy was shot.  I was in the first grade and we had just come back in from recess and my teacher Mrs. Brown was crying and the principal was in our room.  He told us that we were all going home early so we needed to get our things together and get out to the buses.  I raised my hand and asked him what was going on and why was Mrs. Brown crying?  She spoke up and told me it was ok and that I should just go home and our parents would have something to tell us.

So being the good little 6 year old I was I got on the bus and headed home.  When I got there I noticed my dad was in the garage working on our car so I went in to talk to him.  When He saw me he asked, "What are you doing home so early?"  I told him that Mrs. Brown was crying and she said that I should go home and you would have something to tell me.  Well my dad got this real serious look in his eyes and he reached down and grabbed me up by the collar and started shaking me and screamed, "LISTEN HERE BOY!"  "THAT WOMEN IS A WHORE!  " A WHORE AND A LIAR AND YOU SHOULDN’T BELIEVE ANYTHING SHE SAYS!!"  "AND HER SISTERS ARE LIARS TOO!"

He then got a little calmer and put me down and told me, "Now get your ass in the house and never mention this nonsense again…especially to your mother!"  To this day I still can’t figure out what President Kennedy getting shot and Mr’s Brown and her sisters being whores and liars have in common.  Oh well my dad….what a wacky guy!

Anyway, my workouts are going fantastic and I’m feeling stronger everyday.  It’s totally amazing!  Sometimes I walk by a mirror and I can’t believe what I’m seeing!  I’m gonna post some new progress pics Sunday which will be the end of the 5th week for me.  I’m looking for some huge changes! 

Till next time my friends…..Lift Long and Prosper!

"B"

Ya Know What Makes Me Sick??  Well actually lots of things make me sick but for today I’m only gonna talk about one thing in particular.  That one thing would be that I am sick and tired of people thinking 50 is old!!! 

Everywhere I go on here I read blogs about these creepy old guys and they’re referring to someone who is like 56 or 57 or I see comments being left for people who are in their 50’s or 60’s and they start out, "Hey Old Man!"  But the one that really pisses me off is people who are in their 50’s and 60’s referring to themselves as old.  I myself have been guilty of this and it makes me so mad I could take a bite out of a cactus sandwich.   

Hey here’s a News Flash for all you people who think anyone over 30 is old…..Kiss My A$$!!!!!!!  Life doesn’t end at 30!!!  I absolutely guarantee you that I can do as much as any 29 year old and I can probably do more than the average Joe in his thirties!  I’m telling ya 50 is actually the new 30!! 

With the advancements in medicine and living a healthy lifestyle that includes exercise and a proper diet there is no reason to think a person couldn’t live now to be well into their 90’s and likely into the 100’s!! If I live to be 100 plus….which I fully intend to do…that means I have another 50 plus years to look forward to.  That would make me middle aged at best…not freaking old!! 

I’m also not planning on spending those last years strapped to a wheel chair, sitting in a shitty diaper, with drool dripping off my chin, putting on a show with my penis whenever someone is around, or throwing my feces at them like some chimp in a cage.  And,  being tended to by some 20 year old ditz who hates her job and hates anything old!!  Ain’t happening folks!!!

Comon people….look around!  There are a lot of good looking people on here male and female who are 50 plus.  I get mistaken for someone in their late 30’s early 40’s all the time and they say, Man you look good for a 50 year old guy.  Well ya know what?  Thanks but again…kiss my a$$!!  By saying I look good for a 50 year old guy your still saying that you think 50 year old guys are usually nasty looking or should look old which is bologna!! 

I’m on a mission to blow that stereotype right out of the water and I encourage anyone who is 50 plus to help me do the same.  Comon all you so called "OLD FOLKS" come get your respect!!  Show the 30 somethings what they have to look forward to and that we can do anything they can do and more.  We can build muscle same as any age group.  And we look damn good!!!!  I just saw a video of an 80 year old bodybuilder who didn’t start lifting a single weight till she was in her 70’s and brother I’m telling ya she was hot!!  She looked a good 20 to 30 years younger than her contemporaries. 

So comon all you 50 plus people…quit referring to yourself as old and all you people under 30….well….give us a "F"-ing break would ya??? 

Till next time folks!  Lift Long and Prosper!!

So sayeth "B"