The Chronicles of “B”

Remember when I used to write those witty blogs about nothing in particular?  Or how I would write about the adventures of "B" zombie slayer extraordinaire?  Or how about when I would go off on a rant about something I felt really strongly about or if I just felt bitchy? 

Well I wouldn’t expect any blogs like that any time soon.  Why you ask???  Well the answer is simple.  All I can think about anymore is lifting and getting freakishly huge.  I mean brother I am obsessed!  It’s like I spend every waking hour reading up about nutrition or some new routine that promises to add mass or I’m planning my meals for the next week or shopping for my food.  It’s totally insane.  It’s like I’ve just got a one track mind. I find myself at work and my mind wanders off and I start thinking about what routine I’m gonna follow later when I hit the gym.  I’m thinking poundage, sets , reps and what exercises I’m gonna be doing and in what order.  My mind is like racing a hundred miles an hour searching the net for any little thing that might get me the results I desire.  Any little edge. 

And in the gym I’ve been a wild man.  Piling the plates on!!  And each time I lift a weight I didn’t think I could do….well man it’s almost orgasmic I swear!!  It’s like I’m on a quest each and every time I go in there to lift more and more poundage.  I’m just never satisfied. 

Now I don’t know if this is a good thing or not.  Doing something till it becomes an obsession usually isn’t good but in this case how can it really be bad??  I know I’m flipping out at the results I’m seeing so what the hell.  I’m just gonna go with it and enjoy the pump for now. 

So If you notice that I haven’t blogged for a while or returned any comments don’t worry.  I’m probably out in the garage pounding my muscles with some crazy new routine or I’m elbow deep in some muscle mag looking for that edge that’s going to make me the freakishly huge beast I want to be! 

Till next time everyone….Lift Long and Prosper!

"B"   

OMG I had what has to be the ultimate CW moment last night.  To describe it to you I have to get a little graphic so if you are easily offended you might want to look away. 

Anyway as you all know I’ve been going very heavy in my lifting and have been hard at it for almost 4 solid weeks.  Well last night the wife and I were getting busy when the CW moment occured.  I was on my hands in the classic push up position and my wife reached up and grabbed a hold of the backs of my arms as she began to…..well you know. (orgasm)  LOL!!  Anyway after she relaxed a little and was able to speak again she says, "MY GOD!"  "Your arms are freaking huge babe!"  "Plus they’re hard as a rock." "DAMN!"  The rest of the time we were making love she held on to my arms.  Talk about a rush of pride…that was incredible!

Then after words as we laid there with her head on my chest watching TV she kept rubbing my chest.  So I asked her why she was rubbing my chest like that and she said, "Cause I like how hard your boobs are getting!!"  AWESOME!!  Another CW moment!  I said, "Ahhh honey they’re called pecs and thank you!"  My honey is so cool!! Just thought I’d share. 

Lift Long and Prosper!!

"B"

Week 4 has begun and in case you’re curious I’ve posted new progress pics.  I am very pleased with them as even I’m starting to see visible changes.  This going heavy thing is the shits let me tell ya. 

I thrashed my chest and triceps tonight and even though it’s only been an hour since I got done working out I’m already starting to feel the ache in my muscles.  I never thought I’d be glad to have sore muscles.  LOL!! 

The weight is still 234 but I’ve had to tighten my belt and I still find myself pulling up my pants all day long.  I’m telling ya I don’t know how these young kids wear their drawers down on their hips the way they do these days.  It drives me crazy when my pants slide down my hips.  Guess I’m just not cool anymore.

I have a new goal.  About the time my birthday rolls around (April 20th) It will start getting warm enough to start wearing short sleeves and tank tops will soon follow.  My new goal is to have someone at work see me for the first in a T shirt or tank top and go…”DAMN MAN!”  “I didn’t know you were so huge!!!”  Also by the time the Bash rolls around I want to be large and in charge because when the forces of evil learn that King Marmoset and myself are together at one place I fear they will launch an all out offensive and I want to be prepared.  Many a zombie head will roll that day I assure you!!! 

Thanks everyone for your input about my kids.  I think the thing is that they are just out growing Dad.  It really hurts cause my baby girls mean the world to me but ya know they have their own friends and family and much as we hate to I guess we just have to let go at some point.  I have to admit though that sometimes I wish they were still babies!!!  Oh well just like the song says I guess I have to Roll With The Changes. 

Well that’s all for Monday my friends.  Here’s hoping everyone has a spectacular week.  Till next time……..

Lift Long and Prosper!

"B" 

The very funny cartoon above was courtesy of Trixter.  Well here it is Sunday morning and I’m about to start the 4th week of my personal 12 week challenge and I’m telling you I could not be happier with the way things are going. 

The past two weeks I made the decision to go much heavier in my lifting and it is really paying off.  You can actually see visible results now as I think you’ll see when I post my progress pics tomorrow.  I had thought all along that I was using heavy weights but now I see I was a big wuss.  Actually by some standards I still am a big wuss but I’m getting there. 

What I was using as my working weights I’m now using to warm up.  For instance I was using 100lbs to squat and now I warm up with that and bumped my working weight up to 150lbs and expect to go much higher each week.  I did bent rows with 110 on the bar this week and am looking to go higher.  I’m still leery of going too heavy without a spotter but what the hell….no guts….no glory. 

I’ve always kind of kept a journal of what I eat and what I lift but this past week I’ve really done a good job of keeping up with it and found it to be very helpful.  It has shown me that I haven’t been consuming nearly enough protein to promote growth and my calories have barley been enough to maintain my current weight let alone build muscle.  I will make the adjustment this week and continue to track my eating.  I would highly recommend to everyone that they do the same.  If you don’t it’s basically just a crap shoot.  I know it’s a pain in the ass but believe me it really helps.

Sunday Reflections.

Went to my oldest daughters yesterday, the one who just had the baby, and came home thoroughly depressed.  She was always daddy’s girl growing up but now it seems none of them have time for the old man anymore.  My baby girl who is 18 still finds time to call her old dad but I’m thinking that if I never called the other 2 girls they would never think to call me.  

We actually moved back here from Kansas, a place I dearly love to be, so we could be closer to our kids and it’s still like we live in Kansas!  Only….WE LIVE IN STINKING OHIO!!!  To further add to my depression my 2 oldest daughters and their husbands were going out with my ex and her husband to celebrate their anniversary.  They were going out to Applebees and then out bowling and drinking.  ARRRRGHHHH!!!  They’ve never offered to do anything like that with my wife or I.  Oh well maybe I’m just being petty and since winning is against the Hard Core Mutha code I’ll just suck it up and let it go. 

Anyway I am really stoked about starting my 4th week and look forward to even bigger changes.  Watch for my progress pics tomorrow and be sure to stop by and tell me what ya think.  OH, one last thing….I want to think everyone who has stopped by to give me encouragement…especially my friends in the circle.  That’s the kind of thing that keeps me driving on.  I’m really becoming a full fledged CW!!  Everyone have an awesome Sunday and here’s hoping you all have a fantastic week!!

Lift Long and Prosper!!!

"B" 

Well had my first commercial gym experience in several years and for the most part it blows!!  Before I tell ya why it blows though I do have to admit I got an awesome workout in.  Today is quads day and in case you missed it that is the reason I went to the gym.  I wanted to do heavier squats but I don’t have a proper squat rack and I’m to much of a nervous Nellie to go heavy without one.  Got in some awesome squats and also hit the leg extension and leg press.  Loved the leg press!  This is another piece of equipment I need.  Anyway I can barely walk right now and I just know I’m gonna be dying tomorrow…I can’t wait.

Anyway, back to why the gym blows.  When I got there there was absolutely no one in the free weight area which was fine by me but I thought it was a little unusual.  There were plenty of people in the machine area and on the Dread-mills….mostly hair flippers!!!  Oh and some paper dolls!!  Bill you would have been laughing your ass off at these guys. 

The changing area was a joke and there were a couple of lurkers in there shooting the breeze.  I think they were penis puffers but I’m not sure.  Oops can I say penis puffer here??  No lockers or anything so I put all my stuff in my gym bag and took it with me and left it in plain site. 

Well I warmed up and was just loading up the bar to do my warm up set of squats when I saw this paper doll heading my way.  F ing great!!!  So this goof ball walks up to me and sticks out his hand, "Hi I’m Zach and I’m the personal trainer here are you new?"  I shook his limp ass hand and told him yes I was indeed new.  He looks at the bar and says wow that’s quit a bit of weight you got there are you sure you don’t want to warm up first.  

I could feel the burn creeping up my neck!!!  Mind you there is only 70 lbs on the bar!!!!  I looked at him and said, "Dude this is my warm up not my working weight!"  He just gave me a stupid look.  "Well sir if you’re ever interested in training sessions I could hook you up."  I just smiled and then ask him.  "Will it make me look like you?"  "Sure," he said with a smile!  "Then forget it dude!!!"  "If I wanted to be 165lbs soaking wet with no muscle then I’d move to Ethiopia and starve myself!"  His freaking mouth hit the floor I swear to you!  Then he just said….ooo kayyyyyy…turned and left me to my workout.  I noticed that he kept staring at me though the whole time I was working out.  I should have offered to train his dumb ass and make him a real man!!!  What a dip shit!!  Why is it that someone who has a piece of paper saying they’re a trainer think they have all the answers.  There is reason 5,498 that I hate commercial gyms.  Dumb ass Pt’s!!  This kid was all of about 20, was 5′7′’ maybe and weighed 165 tops!!  No muscle development at all!!!!  And they always assume everyone is there to lose weight.  Screw that!!  I wanna be a freak and get huge!! 

At least there were lots of nice looking hair flippers there in short shorts doing aerobics!!!  Sweet!!!! 

Hey if ya all wouldn’t mind I’d be interested to know what kind of poundage your lifting so I could kind of gauge where I’m at.  Mr Meyers is doing 400lb Deads which freaked me out.  Anyone else feel like sharing I’d sure like to know!! 

Anyway that wraps up my Wednesday!!!  Gyms suck but I’ll go back next Wednesday for Quad day!  YeeHaww!!

Lift Long and Prosper!!!

"B"   

Hump day of week 3!!  Man I am really starting to feel the changes taking place now and it’s freaking awesome!  I’m really starting to feel like I’m back in the game. 

I really trashed my biceps last night as well as my hams!  The hams are pretty sore this morning but a good kind of sore.  Did some walking lunges last night.  I’d never really done them before and I really liked the way they felt. 

I feel the diet is really making a difference.  I can really feel and see myself leaning out but also see my muscle development coming out.  Maybe not anything that shows up big time in pics but you can definitely see it.  And I can feel it too and so can my wife.  She was running her hand along my side last night and commented about how lean and tight it was getting.  She also commented about how her honeys big arms were coming back.  A definite CW moment! 

In addition to researching how diet affects my T levels I’ve also done research on how to naturally increase my HGH levels.  In addition to the diet I’ve discovered that researchers have found that if you fast 2 hours before your workout that your HGH levels get a definite boost.  So I don’t eat anything for at least 2 hours before I lift other than I take some glutamine 20 minutes before I hit the gym.  I’ve got a new goal.  This summer when the tank tops and shorts come out I want people to look at me and say, "HOLY SHIT!!"  LOL!! 

I’m going for size baby!!!!!  LOL!!

Gonna try going to a local gym tonight!  It’s quads for me today and I’ve kind of outgrown my little gym when it comes to squats.  I don’t have a proper squat rack and I’m up to using weights now that I can’t safely lift without one.  So I’m off to the gym.  It’s $5 bucks a day and I just plan on going on squat days at least till I can get me a good squat rack.  This will be the first time in several years that I’ve stepped foot in a commercial gym.  I don’t think one day will kill me though!

Well that about covers it for today.  Thanks everyone who has commented on my challenge and left me personal messages of encouragement.  I really feed off of your comments!  You’re the best!  Have an awesome day everyone!

Lift Long and Prosper!

"B"

Monday, Monday!!!  Usually I hate Monday but today was an exception.  The sun was shining and all was well in Shitholeville.  My home town!! 

Here I am starting my 3rd week of my 12 week challenge and every thing is just hunky dorrie!!!  No injuries, no sudden illnesses, no freak accidents, no crazy old ladies with alzheimer’s mistaken me for their dead husbands….all in all life is pretty good. 

My weight is holding steady at 234 but who gives a damn?  Not me I tell ya.  I am really starting to feel the changes.  I’ve had to tighten my belt one extra hole and I still find that I have to keep pulling up my pants.  That’s more reliable than any stupid scale.  Besides I’m trying to build muscle not lose weight….I aint gonna be no Paper Doll!! 

What I’m really happy with is that I’m nearly one quarter of the way to my 12 weeks and I haven’t missed a single workout and I also haven’t cheated on my diet.  Not one single time. 

I’ve posted some new progress pics….do me a favor and check them out and see if you can spot any differences.  Lie if you have too.  LOL!!!

That about covers it for tonight folks.  Till next time………

Lift Long and Prosper!!

"B"

Let Me Tell You about My Wife!  Her name is Maggie and she puts up with a lot of sh*t from me!  I was going to write my blog tonight on something else and I’m sure it would have been brilliant and dazzled all who read it but I was sitting here tonight thinking about my wife and thinking about how important she is to what I do. 

Everyone who lives this lifestyle knows how important it is to have your spouse and loved ones support and how difficult it can be without it.  I hear people complain on here all the time about how they feel their spouse is holding them back or doing things that makes staying on a clean diet difficult.  But ya know what.  We probably seldom stop to think about how hard it can be on them.  I mean think about the amount of time we devote to our sport.  We are either constantly preparing food, eating food, or working out.  It really doesn’t leave a whole lot of time for your spouse.

Maggie is so awesome.  She understands how important it is to me to be in shape and although I know she feels neglected sometimes she seldom bitches about it.  She very seldom even grumbles about the amount of time I spend on here talking to you all.  And she never gets jealous even when she knows I’m telling other women on here how gorgeous they are and give them words of encouragement!  She understands me and knows how I operate so she knows she has nothing to worry about. 

She has always trusted me which is pretty cool considering she is my 5th wife!  That’s right 5!!!  I know right now all the women are thinking….man he must have been an a-hole to have been married 4 times before.  Well see that’s one reason I love my wife so much.  She never thought that.  Not once did she think that I must have been the reason my previous marriages failed.  She took the time to get to know me as a person and didn’t make snap judgements.  Truth be known I wasn’t at fault for my failed marriages.  My first wife turned out to be bi sexual and I caught her in bed with another woman, my second wife was a lazy slug who wanted a meal ticket not a husband and turned out to be the most hateful person I’ve ever had the displeasure of meeting, and my third wife turned out to have mental problems.   Now my 4th wife I do have to take the blame for that.  She was a wonderful women and I’m here to tell the whole world that I screwed her over in the worst possible way with my current wife.  She didn’t deserve to be treated that way and not a day goes by that I don’t feel some regret about it.  She treated me like a king and I repaid her by cheating on her with Maggie. I know it’s not really a good excuse but my 4th wife and I were just never on the same page if that makes any sense.  We were happy and we never fought but we had absolutely nothing in common.  We were just like two happy roommates.  I kind of did my thing and she did hers.  Like I said though I take full responsibility for that breakup.  When I met Maggie I think I knew right from the start that we were soulmates…if you believe in that sort of thing.  I knew I could stay with my 4th wife and live a very happy and content life but after awhile I knew I could not live  without Maggie.  So I did the selfish thing and left my 4th wife for her.  Like I said I have to live with that guilt but I am so glad I have Maggie!

I’m here tonight to tell the whole world how freaking lucky I am to have a wife who supports me not only in my bodybuilding efforts but in everything I do.  What a joy it is to have a life partner who knows me as well as I know myself and accepts me in spite of all my faults and all my bullsh*t!!  I love her and I’m so happy she loves me!!

That’s all for tonight my friends!  Till tomorrow

Lift Long and Prosper!! 

Wow here it is Thursday week 2 of my 12 week challenge and so far nothing catastrophic has happened to me.  Holy Moly!!  I’m glad things are going so well but I have to admit my nerves are twitching like a zombie at the end of a 12 gauge shotgun!!!  I keep expecting to come down with the flu or to strain a muscle or to have some freak accident.  Like being struck down in the Kroger by some crazed grandma on her hover round!!  Believe me they will run you down like a dog and not even look back! 

Going back to lifting heavy has been an excellent decision for me.  I’m starting to see little changes in the way I look and I can absolutely feel the difference in my muscles. 

One thing I really want to prove through this 12 week challenge is that you can make some big changes without having to spend hundreds of dollars on all the latest supplements!!  My apologies to all the self described supplement whores out there.  If you feel spending all that money on supplements gets you the results your after that’s great.  It is your money after all and who am I to tell you how to spend it.  I just happen to believe that I can get similar and perhaps better results through diet and exercise and buying a few select but inexpensive supplements. 

My diet has been consisting of a lot of Testosterone boosting foods especially in the way of beef.  I’ve been eating a steak every morning along with whole eggs and sometimes steel cut oats.  I flavor the oats with fresh apples and cinnamon.  In addition to helping boost your T beef is also a huge food source of creatine.  Yup that’s right creatine.  That stuff that many of us pay $65+ for a container!  I also eat lots of estrogen suppressing foods like broccoli and cabbage.  Too much estrogen causes you to store fat!  I’m getting all my protein from food sources.  Milk, eggs and meat!!!  No $50 designer whey protein.  I may on occasion pick up a protein bar and am considering buying a cheap tub of whey protein.  You can pick up whey protein by Body Fortress all day long at Wally World for like $12.99! 

I do buy some supplements but they are few and they are inexpensive.  Most of my supplement money is spent on vitamins.  Daily I take 50mg of zinc to boost my T production and fortify my immune system.  1200mg of vitamin E, 3000mg of vitamin C, 2000mg of D which is excellent for strong bones and has been shown to have excellent anti cancer potential.  I also take a very good multi vitamin and I take Saw Palmetto everyday to support my prostate especially considering my efforts to boost Testosterone.  These vitamins are very inexpensive and I probably don’t spend as much on them in a month as most people spend on supplements in a week.  Other than the vitamins I take a tribulus extract to help with boosting my T.  I use TribuTest from *********.  For 90 1000mg caps the cost is only $13.95.  And last but not least I use Glutamine powder that I purchase from Wal Mart for $9.99 and I occasional use some creatine by Body Fortress that I mix in my smoothie after my workout.  Cost is $12.99 for a large container.  I truly believe that anything other than these few things I mentioned are a waste of money. 

Now if some big supplement company wanted to prove me wrong and would pony up the supps after my 12 weeks are up and compare the 2 results I’d be game but I’m willing to bet my inexpensive way is just as good.  One of the main reasons I’m doing things this way is to inspire all those people who use cost as an excuse not to be getting the results they seek.  I really want to show them it can be done! 

Well that about wraps up Thursday.  I hope everyone has a spectacular day and lets all start the weekend on a good note!  Lift Long and Prosper my Friends!!

"B"

Well Week 2 of my 12 week challenge has started off pretty great…no thanks to that damn scale.  Stepped on it Monday morning thinking that I probably dropped about 10 lbs….think again buddy!!  The Damn thing didn’t move at all.  I’m still at 234!  This really pissed me off at first because I worked my tail off the past week.  Double cardio everyday plus I lifted pretty hard on 3 days and I ate clean as a whistle for the entire week…not one cheat!!  I was stunned that my weight stayed the same.  I got over it pretty quick though because even if it doesn’t show up in the progress pics…which I’ll be posting in a few…or on the scale…I can feel it in the tightening of my muscles so I know I dropped BF!! 

Starting yesterday I’m going back to my old routine of cardio in the morning and then lifting hard and heavy in the evenings one or 2 body parts each day and resting on the weekends. 

Monday.  Chest and triceps

Tuesday.  Biceps and Hams

Wednesday.  Quads

Thursday.  Back

Friday.  Shoulders

I’ll be lifting heavy, heavy, heavy!!!  I’m not even thinking about weight loss now…screw that!  If it happens that’s cool but I’m not losing any sleep over it anymore.  I’m just concerning myself with BF!  If I stay at 234 for ever more that’s just fine just as long as I’m ripped with low BF%!  My attitude has been stellar thus far and I’ve managed to stay healthy for more than a week which has been next to impossible lately so that’s a major accomplishment!  So anyway, I’m off to take those nasty progress pics.  More later!  Lift long and prosper my friends!! 

"B"