The Chronicles of “B”

Well it seems I’m quit popular these days for one reason or another…not all of them good….and as a result I’ve been getting a lot of questions asked of me through comments e-mails and especially PM’s!  Now my life is an open book and I don’t mind answering any thing.  Actually I’m kind of stunned that anybody would even find me slightly interesting…but if someone wants to know something about me I usually try to answer.  So, since I have been swamped by so many questions I thought I would post a few of them along with my replies.  As a public service so to speak….that way if any one was wondering about silly little things that affect my life they might find the answer here.

I swear to you these are actual questions that people have asked me since I’ve been a member here and these were my actual replies!!!

Q.  You sure seem to have a lot of time on your hands.  What do you do for a living??  Do you have a real job or do you work for the CIA or something?

A.  I only work for the CIA on weekends and once in awhile I may accept a special assignment but mostly I work at a local newspaper doing a variety of jobs that range from writing commentary to actually delivering newspapers.  I write a syndicated article under another name but due to legalities I am not allowed to tell you any more than that.  Suffice it to say if you live in the Midwest chances are you’ve read an article by me.

Q.  Have you really sucker punched a Hyena???  (thanks King Marmoset)

A.  No I have never sucker punched a hyena or any other kind of animal although I once kicked an overly aggressive wolverine in the nut sack!!  Crazy little bastard!!!

I’ve recently been asked this question!

Q.  Are you gay??

A.  No but if the pay is good I would be willing to learn!  Do you offer on the job training?

Q.  (This was from a woman) I just noticed the pics of your wife in your gallery and on your MySpace.  She appears to have very large boobs.  Has she had any work done?

A.  Yes, I work on them all the time! 

Q.  (This was also from a woman…thank God)  I noticed in your one pic where you are standing in your back yard in your short shorts that you look to have a pretty large package.  I don’t suppose you would send me a nude pic.  Guess I’m just nosey!

A.  Dear nosey!  I would be more than happy to send you a nude photo but I’m afraid you would be highly disappointed.  That pic should come with a warning sign that reads…Objects may appear larger in pic than they actually are!

Q.  Did you and your wife actually go to a nudist resort?  Weren’t you embarrassed to take off your clothes in front of total strangers? 

A.  Yes we actually went to a nudist resort and yes I was a little embarrassed at first but once we actually got out and started to meet people it was just like having clothes on.  You don’t really notice it till you realize you’ve got a sunburn on your penis…then reality slaps you upside the head!!  OUCH!!

Q.  (from a guy) That towel pic is disgusting!  Your 50 years old for crying out loud you perv.  This is a bodybuilding site not a male porn site.  I think you’re sick you old homo! 

A.  Well I think you’re a retard!!  Guess we all have our crosses to bare, huh idiot!!!

I think that should about cover it for right now.  I’ll post some more another time because believe me these are some of the tame ones!!  There are some even more outrageous.  I also want to thank everyone who left a comment on my last blog.  You are to kind and too funny.  I’m glad you are all my friends!!

"B"

This entry was posted on Wednesday, November 28th, 2007 at 1:16 pm and is filed under Training. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.