How the life goes…
Well I was nervous the whole day as I was not really honest in the diet. I had the order to rest from the diets etc. But not so much as I did…. Pizza, icecreams etc… So I expected my coach will be p… off… but I did not expect what came in the gym…
He came a little bit late. When I dressed off - with my suit already under my clothes - he looked at me less than one minute and than he said only one word - “HORRIBLE DISSASTER!”
Than he told me to tell him my food….. and than it started. I recieved a lecture. The topic of this lecture was my fatt ass and the nutrition.
Than he told me I can not call myself a bodybuilder now as I have so many bodyfat like shotputter or jawelin thrower instead (same muscles but no DEFINITION!). And my arms looks like arms of strongman - big and fat. And I am on the same level as a fat woman comming in the gym to loose the fat - never ever as athlete before the beginning of the competition precontest……
He also told me that I am not doing this because of him, but because of myself. But when I do my job bad - I break HIS neck too… As his reputation is connected to me. He invests his time and knowledge to me - while I am sh…ing on it.
And he gave me the ultimatum - Either I will do EVERYTHING HE SAYS FROM NOW ON WITH ABSOLUTELY NO EXCEPTIONS OR HE WILL KICK ME OUT.
I dont want to loose him off course.
He was merciless…. cold-hearted.
I look much better in pictures - the reality doesnt do me justice. Usually people says it the other way around.
I cried a while when he left with my fiance. But he was true.
My biggest fault is not to be consistant in my diet. I know it. But my body is not working like body of anone else. Cheat days may just to kick your metabolism into the higher turns, but not mine.
My coach is not choosing the words but he knows what the judges will look like. He knows I lost several competitions because of being fat or let say having the fat on the abs and hips - that means I was above 10% of bodyfat.
I want to be a competitor and yes - for everyday life I was lean, but NOT FOR COMPETITOR. Here I have to watch myself different eyes. I can not compete with shaking a$$….
I understand him, I respect him. I know the day when he will be satisfied I may win. And I agree with him. I was not consistant again. I just did not want to agree with that. He is perfecionist and knows this sport wants the whole man, if you wants to win. No exceptions. I knows it too, but I was a little bit free-minded. 
I know what he wants. I will try. He is the best coach here - but only the best people here are strong enough to work with him. And I dont want to loose him.
That is all….
