BRONWYN - SHAPING UP!

Well a lot of things had happened while I was not able to write here. I was bussy, I was ending up the 12 week programm and I put here the final stats. Now two weeks should be the deload before new programm but I am ill - having the squinsy because of the aircondition in the gym…

Here are just some thoughts…. Trainings are in my training log here: http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=107671221

7.7.08

Well, today is the first day of really well done routines/nutrition - or I hope so.
Yesterday I had 400g of watermelone, 2 peaches and some red currant as the fruit meal. I had some Angus beef  instead 1 meal of chicken with wholecorn bread… Also I had only massage of shoulders, traps and chest - as I have them stretched (I did not do triceps dips some time and on Thursday I did 3 full sets). I used to go to professional masseur, but my fiance learned professional massage - so he takes care about me now. But yesterday we had no time in the evening….

My goal now is to get rid of bodyfat somewhere close to competition weight 127-130 lb aprox. And than do a clean bulking.
 

8.7.2008

Yesterday I was in the bank to do a wire transfer to the company with posing suits. Here are maybe 3x more expensive than in USA - so I order them from Suits You comp.. I did this transfer the last year - so I asked the bank clerk how to fill the form as I dont remember it. She was totally stupid with “I dont know” answer all the time… So I am expecting the call from the bank each minute today. I only hope they will do the transfrer right and I will not lose the money. I decided that second two piece I will sew at home myself in hand… I bought a very nice matherial - rainbow “snake skin” … So I will try it. I will took the pattern from my old posing suit….

13.7.08

I changed my training plan a little bit. I will train now 3+1 and 2+1 to have more free days as I was overtrained a little bit.
We were at home today the whole day. It is stormy and rainy weather here - with heavy clouds on the sky. I am sleepy. I am still happy that I have my new photocamera.

I did the measurement in the morning and I was very disappointed as I did not change. I have the same weight, same measurements…. my metabolism is still blocked now.
I will call my coach in the evening. I will have to talk about this with him. Tomorrow test results will tell me more I hope.

14.7. 2008

Test results are half to half positive and negative. All values, which was bad after mym illness are OK, also the T4 and T3 hormonal levels are in normal range - but very low. But the sonography showed permanent damage of my thyroid gland. It is nothing too serious, I will be not operated, but it seems that I will be on lower dosages of thyroid hormones untill the rest of my life…. (Also it means if I will continue in IFBB I will have to ask for drug-exception as thyroid hormones are banned too ).

I called this to my coach imediatelly. I thought he will say that I will be not able to compete. But he told me to send him my test results and he will go to some specialist on sport medicine and will tell me in the evening how to continue. So I am happy he let me the hope.
 

15.7.2008

So I missed the morning cardio. All day I really wanted to eat some chocolate… Off course it is normal. But I am proud that I did not do it! Hooray 
Also I have no thoughts about training… but finally I decided to go…. and I did good thing as I did PRs in all exercises!
And finally I did the cardio 
So now in the evening I can say it was quite nice day, because I did it right.

07/19/08

Today I slept very long time so I did not do morning cardio. Today is a lazy day…. I was feeling really tired the whole day. I stretched my left lower back muscle. So when I went to training I thought I will be not able to go to my best.
We were in Holmes place again, but not in the spa. No time for that.
Despite all I was able to go to my highest weights and at benchpress and donkey calve rises I did PRs. Mainly 253lb for calves was good. At benchpress I did more than is my bodyweight now.
Tomorrow is my off day… Carbs…But I will have to think what to do to treat my back.

07/21/08

On Sunday it was 12 weeks after my return back to the gym. 7 weeks was the first phase when I was getting back, now I was in the strenght phase… So I bilanced a little bit the changes I went through…

benchpress 30kg/66lb ………………….70kg/154lb (+40kg/88lb)
squat40kg/88lb…………………………..80kg/176lb (+40kg/88lb)
EZ bic.curls 20kg/44lb…………………..40kg/88lb (+20kg/44lb)
bent over barbell rows 50kg/110lb ….. 75kg/165lb (+25kg/55lb)
military press behind the neck - barbell 30kg/66lb ….60kg/132lb (+30kg/66lb)
side latearls 5kg/11lb……………………15kg /33lb (+10kg/22lb)
tric. pulldowns 20kg/44lb……………… 55kg/110lb (+35kg/77lb)
dumbell biceps curls10kg/22lb ……….. 15kg/33lb (+5kg/11lb)
leg extensions 24kg/52.8lb …………… 60kg/132lb (+46kg/101.2lb)
leg curls 15kg/33lb …. ………………….35kg/77lb (+20kg/44lb)
bent over dumbell rows 30kg/66lb …….45.5kg/100lb (+15.5kg/34lb)

07/23/08

I am not a shopping queen and I am not keen into seasonal discounts… But today I went to buy my mineral water for the day in the office and I saw really nice violet LEATHER jacket FOR ONLY 199 Czech Crownds (it is about 13$) … REAL LEATHER. And the price before the discount was about 1590 CzK (106$)!!!!! WOW. Off course I HAD to BUY it… it is a little bit tight over my back and chest, but it is the “Autumn time” jacket and I may wear it open…. I was really happy

07/26/08

Regeneration:
whirlpool 35 minutes
finnish sauna 2×10-6 min
Salt cave 2×8min
herbal steam 2×15-10 min

Well today is a lazy day. I feel tired and little bit headache after sauna. I felt all right in the morning so I agreed to go to to the spa today with my fiance, but now I am not sure if I did right.
Left side of back is pulled. It is better a little bit after the spa, but still I feel it. In other ways I am all right.

07/28/08 - SHOULD BE A TRAINING DAY BUT I AM FIGHTING WITH THE ILLNESS 

Yesterday evening I felt how my neck hurts a lot. Today in the morning I had already white tongue and red neck inside… probbably tonsilitis or sore throat. I have no fever - or only a slight one. But I can not swallow anything without the pain. 

Off course if tomorrow I will have the sore throat still, I will go to see my doctor. I got a lesson this year and I really dont want to underestimate anything again!

07/29/08 FIRST DAY OF ILLNESS

Well so I am definatelly ill. I have a squinsy/quinsy  … Probbably I got it from the air condition in the big gym. In cardio zone it was really cold there and I am not used to it… In the gym where I train is constant temperature (one advantage of underground)… and no wind or cold airconditions….

I am thankfull now, that my coach refused to let me do Universe this year - as now I am not in the time stress.

TODAY 07/31/08 - Third day of me being ill

I can not believe that it is half of the summer gone. In 7 days I will have my nameday and another 14 days later my birthday.
Autumn will be tough time for me again - when competitions will start here and probbably we will go to see it…. It will be hard for me to see other competitors on stage.
I got three new invitations to Autumn competitions and my heart was realy bleeding (as well as in Summer), when I had to write the phrase “I am sorry but this year I am not able to compete….”

I got also the offer - that when I am not able to compete - I may go and do some tests and come to one international competition as a judge - as I always have good points in my articles when I wrote about the competitions. But I think it would be not good, when next year I want to compete there again. I can not judge the same people who are competing with me… It is enough time to be a judge later. Off course I was flattered by this offer….

The illness is better today. Medicine helped me and the only really BAD is the caugh. But it will take some time to get rid of it… And the chest muscle still hurts but it is also better today. I may touch it. Yesterday and the day before massaging it was very painfull…. and I did it with clanched teeth.

I have no idea what will be my food today. Yesterday evening I was finally able to eat chicken meat and beans.

I am a little bit afftaid if I will not lose some muscles and gain some fat, while I am in the bed…

I will see, but I think next week I may be back in the gym. I thought I will try to go to the benchpress competition next weekend, but off course now it is not good idea - to start so soon after illness + after the inflammation of chest muscles….

In next two weeks I am starting my precontest…

I will be in diet for 9 months as I was never ripped enough and my coach wants me to get to the real quality. That is crazy but I hope to be able to do it.

THAT IS ALL… I hope I will have more time to write here some of my random thoughts again regullary.

XOXOXO Lada

Well I did not write for some time.

I decided that I definatelly will do the competitions next year. I wished to go on Universe again really a lot. But for two weeks I saw it is something wrong with me… and Mondays tests showed it up. I have damaged thyroid gland - the illness I had in the past awake again…

So in this moment I am on synthetic thyroid hormones (letrox) and I will be probbably on it untill the rest of my life. On this will be super hard to be lean….

During the weekend I enjoyed my free days and relaxation procedures again. Full 45 minutes in the warm whirlpool, one hour of herbal steam and relax in the salt cave… and the next day back+legs massage with the warm oil with herbs too (eucalyptus and lavender) …. I really enjoyed it a lot. I remember how I was not used to it and I dont like it at all - mainly I was affraid how other people will react on my body. But now I really enjoy each minute of it…. I think I may say that in training days I go hard and it is very backbreaking for me. So I need to rest and relax a lot when I have some time (and money)….

Today I am very sleepy. Tired. Third day of training in a row… tomorrow is my free day, but no relax as I have to go to my job and do milion things around. I wish to be the weekend again…. 

Well, I think this weekend I was totally disgusted, demotivated and overtrained. I think I did two steps back but the whole week I was fighting with feelings of uncertainity and moodiness…

I was focused on stupid things. Dang - I always have to look back and say I survived! I might be dead! And when I was ill I was stronger than ever, so why to be weak now… but well, it is hard.

All is only about my dream to show I may overcome the illness in sucha short time and compete in November. And about my hard coach who told me that he will not let me go! So this was the red line during the last week….

On Friday I came in the gym late and in totally bad mood. I was able to hurt myself as I can not find the concentration. So my fiance sent me at home. Coach and Daniel allowed me two days free, without any training - only cardio - with some junk food - only one a day….

I relaxed at TV, created new PC art and I have to say after this time I found my way again. I think I am now resigned to the fact I will compete in 2009 Spring. It will give me more time I need. But still I have to get down my weight on 130 lb or so, before the bulking phase. I hope it will be all right.

Today I did the food clear and I am waiting to get out of my job and go to the gym again. I will train legs+back and I hope I will get bak on the level from 9.6. 2008 and more… back to my March shape before my story went another direction than I wanted.

Yesterday was a free day and the second visit at the specialist - physiotherapist. He was quite satisfied as he told that my inner deep stabilization system is much more better after all those exercises I had to do each morning. Off course I have to continue in them + add some gymball exercises too. I guess I will add them each free day. He also looked at my stretched shoulder/back and helped me with that too. So pains are away. Now I will see him regullary each 4-6 months and he will work with me.
Also he told me to not neglect other regeneration - as massages, steam/sauna, proper stretching and some additional sports to my main activity…I will. At least I get used to massage and sauna and relaxing in free days. I did not like sauna/steam a lot before. But I realized I am relaxed and my muscles are soft and smooth and I feel fine after each visit in the Spa. The same after the massage.

But also I felt from the sky on the ground again. What caused I was not very nice person last days. Quarreled with Daniel and was not very pleasant person at all.

I have to put up with the fact that some other people lives my dreams, while for me it will stay a dream for a long long time. I always dreamed about competing in USA one day. And in fact I negotiated about something for this year.. now all is gone.

I will not compete, I am not international athlete again, and my coach told me I will start with the small regional competitions next year again… Bump!

The ground is sometimes hard. I have to put up with the fact I was never ever ripped to 100%, I will have to trrain more than ever to reach my positions back, I will compete ONLY on the LOWEST level again… and at least in 2009, not now! No Universe definatelly, no World Cup (new invitation), no Las Vegas competition….Just small shows again.

Sleeping in the car and under the tent, small and dirty backstages…. travelling by old borrowed car or by train and bus…. travelling dirty in the competition tan after the contest… I know how it was. Will I be able to do it again?

You may imagine how I felt. I cried almost two days.

Now I have to get back again…

If start from the beggining is my destiny I will have to fight with it.

Maybe I went up too fast. From real zero to hero in one year…. from regional show to international stage in 7 months… now I have to get back and continue regullary. And pay for the last year.

It is hard.. I still cry in my mind. But no other way. I resigned to all my dreams I had. I am a dreamer, but I have to learn to walking on the ground. Maybe next years will be better… maybe in 5 -10 years I will be good enough to dream again…

In this moment my motivation is on the ground too. But I know that I have to stand up and go. Live have to be lived… And nobody will do any work instead of me…

I continue in cutting, as I have to get rid of all the fat I gained in the hospital soon.