My Crazy Obsession with the Gym

So I finally spent a minute and uploaded all the show pictures my boyfriend took at my show… and only like 8 are there. WTF?? There were like 20. I’ll figure it out later… at least the photographer will send better ones.

I never feel like I get defined en ough. Oddly, I felt more cut and vascular when I was drinking a ton of water and not carbed up. Maybe my posing just sucks, I was just playing around before prejudging in this shot…. oh the games. I feel like I never make progress sometimes. Maybe that means I don’t get big enough in the offseason - whatever.

Still need to find a new workout split. Got a great new leg workout (thanks!) and switched up things for my back… but that still leaves some parts out.

Have a good day!

It’s Wednesday and I’m still exhausted. My energy is back during the day but I can’t wake up in the mornings - my body refuses to wake up to my alarm anymore which ruins my going to the gym in the AM.

So far this week, did legs and shoulders - legs felt like they were getting strength back although I was pressed for time and only did 2sets each: laying leg press, extensions, squats, curls, calves. Shoulders rested up quicker, military press / lateral raises / delt flyes have already jumped up 15lbs in what I can do. It’s such a nice feeling to not be dead-tired when lifting… forgot what that was like!

I need to do some thinking about putting new lifts into my split. I also need to do some serious bulk-grocery shopping, I am trying my BEST to keep my 4-wks out diet plan so I don’t get fat between shows… has gone A-OK except for the daily brownie or 2 No more! I am excited again to lift heavy and put on some muscle… wider/thicker back, bigger shoulders, bigger tri’s, and some more quad sweep. Since I plan on eating 98% clean, I’m giving low-intensity cardio a shot: 6-7 days of 30-40 on the treadmill @ H.R. 135-145bpm. which is walking. Tried it last night - man was it boring - so I had to throw a couple mins of running in here and there. I DO enjoy sweating and working hard during cardio so I will still keep the more intense stuff in there.

I am exhausted even though I slept like a baby last night. My poor hubby’s t-shirts are stained from the dream tan I forgot how draining this can be. I must have drank at least a gallon of water this morning and STILL have yet to pee it out… damn dehydration. surely will be carrying that water around on me for the next few days. He took a lot of pics so as soon as I figure out how to, I will put some up, and the ones from the photographer too.

There is another show - USBF? I think - in 3-4wks, and another in about 8wks. I need to do one of them - I feel like I need a goal right now. Maybe that’s also the post-contest blues; I didn’t lift today and I ate sooo much crap that I had been missing the past 2 months. Back to the 4wks out diet tomorrow. The nice thing about these upcoming 2 shows is that they don’t have nearly as many mandatories as NABBA, plus figure doesn’t do a routine - just stagewalk and quarter turns. My abs still hurt from flexing so hard and so long up there during comparatives; more effective than traditional ab work.

Tomorrow will be a cardio, legs, and triceps day. A bodybujilding couple at my gym - who are in phenomenal shape year-round - always make fun of me since I was running like a gerbil on a wheel for my last prep. They SWEAR by walking on the t-mill to keep heart rate around 130-147 …. and that’s all I’d need to lose fat and keep muscle. Sounds too good to be true!!! So……… I’ll give it a shot. Why not?? If it works or doesn’t, I’ll be able to tell in a few weeks and can switch back to runs. Also my body is soo used do superintense cardio probably by now that it wouldn’t respond to it anyway. Does treadmill walking work for any chicks out there?

I am out to plan my next thing and sleep. Have a good night and Monday morning! Thank you for the congratulations

Show over; took home a trophy too: got 5th place out of 11 girls. Not bad. The one girl who took 2nd was jacked and gorgeous and nice to boot - we were so pissed when she got 2nd to the girl who took first. No bad feelings towards the 1st placer, we just can’t figure out how the girl in 2nd - who was bigger, more shapely, more graceful, and fuller (the first place girl was very stringy and lean) - didn’t get first. Her boyfriend(husband?) referenced a scenario about politics… what the hell. I’ll never get how politics can ruin it for someone who put a ton of time and dedication and sweat for a trophy.

Prejudging was TOUGH - they did callouts and we were constantly flexed onstage for what felt like 10mins. We were all sweating and shaking and dripping. Eww, there goes the hair and makeup. I must have bought the wrong makeup, used Maybelline foundation, because it DIDNT WANT TO STICK to my spray-tan. I would get dirty streaks, wtf? My boyfriend went beyond the call of duty yesterday, listening to my neurotic brain and grumpiness and very dutifully putting on my messy dream tan. I owe him. A very good guy, he did his best, and I was VERY grateful to have him there with me.

Ate a LOT post-show… and not digging the super-full feeling. I have never wanted water more in my life either - and I am retaining it BADLY. Guess that’s what happens when it’s reintroducced after not drinking and using diuretics. I am really not craving too much crap - just real whole food not in micro-portions. Hopefully in a few days my body will stop retaining water and go back to normal.

There’s a show in late Oct, and one in mid-Nov that I could do. And some photographer there wanted to set up a shoot, that would be new. I don’t know what I’m going to do, I would likie to do another one - if I do, it will probably be november so I can "relax" for a few weeks. At the very least, I’m not undoing all of my hard work the past 2 months. I’ll put complex carbs back into my diet, but stick to the plan I was given for 5 weeks out or so.

I was told to be drier, and to work on my posing. OK witht he hposing, but drier??? I only drank coffee fri and sat and took a diuretic. Thurs was only 40oz of water. i don’t know what I did wrong. I want to get bigger too, no matter how lean I am I just can’t seem to get my abs to pop - actually my boyfriend told me they’re visible when I’m RELAXED, and disappear when I FLEX. Crazy right????

LAST 5 days, I’m amazed I stuck to it until this point. My suit fits FINE - no pinching anywhere, and I’m really happy with how I look in it. BUT - it’s a bit baggy in the butt area… thank God I didn’t order the large. It’s off to the seamstress at the local dress place to see if she can take it in quick… or I will sew it myself. It won’t be too bad, but I’ve never sewn on stretchy stuff before so I’d rather leave it to a pro.

Workouts are getting rough, and I’m starting to feel rundown and sick. I haven’t been able to get myself "sore" in weeks, but aparrently this is very normal and as long as you keep working bodyparts, it will be fine. I am really suprised that my abs came in before my legs, they are catching up. It sucks because with the back arching in front poses, I feel like I can’t keep my abs contracted hard enough to show like in other poses, but hopefully with dehydration that will change. I’ve been waterloading since friday and added a TON TON TON of salt today  - I haven’t had salt in 2 months - so I feel very watery. It feels worse than PMS with all this water retention… but,  Better get in the liquid before it’s taken away on Wed.

I still need to figure out my "routine". It will be a simple walk with 6-10 poses over 60 seconds. Procrastinator as usual.

I can’t decide between ProTanning or spray-tanning. My nutritionist has a guy she sees who has a bodybuilder tan color that is "perfect"… but that’s almost $100 over my $20 bottle of ProTan. Hmm. The pro side is that it’s over and done in less than an hour, and with ProTan I’ll be doing it for 3 days, at least an hour each day. Money is tight and I’ll have to wait and see how much I get paid.

Nerves have not kicked in yet. I feel confident with how I look, and really my only goal with this show was to 1 - actually follow through for once, and 2 - look better than at my first show (which is the same show actually) 3 years ago. And I’ve completed BOTH so I am ok. Everyone would love to win, it would rock if I could place, but I am not counting on it and am really just doing this for fun.

I am confused about makeup though - do you pro-tan your face at all, even just one coat? Is regular makeup (drugstore type) OK as long as it’s dark enough - like using the very contrasting colors? Should it be applied extra thick and heavy - lines, shading, etc? Someone told me for my first show that it should look like clown makeup closeup. Any advice on this area would be appreciated, I don’t want to look like a blank face with a wad of hair around my head. It would be nice for people to see that I have eyes!

Goodnight.. it’s another MONDAY. Boo. Weekends are too short.

Of COURSE my suit finally arrives when I get my period. No way am I putting that thang on right now with all this water and bloating. This time, the bottoms are a medium instead of a large… they don’t look too terribly tiny as feared when I got’em out of the bag… BUT it’s too late now. It will be what it will be.

Yesterday and today have been messy, had to switch hours due to work and got kinda thrown off. Ever feel like you just can’t make a bodypart sore anymore the next day, no matter how hard you work? That’s probably just the fatigue, but it’s damn annoying. 2-30min runs within 3 hours plus chest, bi’s, and abs. 40min of cardio tonight, maybe another 30 later, plus some legs and abs. I don’t think I really have a split anymore, just "let’s keep getting muscles in" as often as I can in a week. My brain is just on overload with all of the things I need to keep track of…

If I can really - TRULY - keep my diet tight in the next 2 weeks, I think it will be all OK on the 20th. I have been really strict with it and have been consistently losing… but I can’t help but wake up at night and eat PB (my enemy). Ravenous! It’s not like I eat half a jar or anything… but progressing while doing this makes me wonder how good I could look if I hadn’t. Oh well. I have another show in November.

I met another girl at the gym last night who’s a competitor (yay!). She did a show in June and was really bummed that she had gained alllll her weight back. It’s really hard to go "back to where you used to be" or gain a few lbs back off-season once you see yourself at your best. But I can’t imagine how exhausting and unhealthy it would be to maintain that year-round unless it came naturally (and if that leanness comes naturaly to you - I hate you - just kidding hehehe). I think it’s too stressful… having to worry and micromanage everything just to maintain it all. I am looking MUCH forward to relaxing a bit and gaining back a little. Especially because it means I’ll have energy again, I’ll be less apathetic, and stronger/better workouts.

Did I mention how much I love reading other people on here? It makes it that much more accomplishable and not as impossible-seeming.

I can’t believe it’s practically here. Next week I’ll be starting my dehydration thing and tanning and geeking out. MY LAST WEEK…. oh shit. I still don’t feel "ready" but I’m told you won’t feel ready until you’re tanned and painted and suited and dried and up there with the rest of them. I look good but I don’t know if it’s good enough - as with anyone I wish I had done more or more time, etc, but I trust the woman helping me and am just going to do it, go up there, and smile. Enough freaking for now.

Mandatory overtime screwed up my weekend cardio; instead of 5 hours apart my double cardio day is only 1.5max. This will be tough. I already got in my first 40min run after a leg workout and a full day of work… one more to go. I am missing 2 meals today but I’d rather miss them than overeat. It’s cold, rainy, wet, I"m tired, hungry, and watching the Food Network Comfort Food Pot Pie special on TV while eating my salad makes me want to drool

Guess new pictures will have to wait until after show day to be sure… I am such a slacker and my brain is nonexistent these last few weeks. Have a great Saturday night, drive safely in this tropical storm weather.