First I like to wish everyone a Safe and Fun St. Patrick’s Day. I track my ancestry back to Ireland and even though my family roots pre-date the Revolutionary War, I take special pride in knowing my DNA came from the Emerald Isle!
My favorite Irish Saying: “With an Irishman you can trust him with your money or your life but never your liquor or your wife!”
Back to the topic at hand. The Saboteurs among us. I feel like my blog here is a safe environment. A place where I can discuss eating clean, forced reps, supplements and just about anything else fitness related. In fact being able to come to this site and interact with other fitness “nuts” is one of the highlights of my day. How sad is that?
I think that feeling comes from being accepted here and not being told to shut up when I talk about carbs, protein and workout sessions. In my ordinary life, my wife sometimes give me the look after about 15 minutes of explaining the eating 6 times a day theory to a stranger who has asked me about diet or working out, when they were only trying to make polite conversation.
In speaking with J on this site who is listed as one of my friends we got into a discussion that triggered some thoughts on my inner circle of family and friends who are not so driven in the fitness world.
J had a tough day with her diet and some feedback from a family member about one of her progress pictures. Of course after she posted this, her blog had many posts showing her support and encouragement and giving her kind words.
That got me thinking about my inner circle and how even the most subtle gesture or action can speak volumes about those around me. Let me clarify.
Most days when I am out in the general public I will receive feedback from a stranger or a co-worker (someone that I do not consider in my inner circle) about the way I look or they will have a question related to fitness that they ask me about.
My inner circle of friends and family however can sometimes give a back handed compliment given in order to somehow keep me in my place. Here is an example. From my sister.
“Hey you look great! A lot better than you did in October when you looked like a pregnant man!”
My sister in law to my wife. “Hey you are right he is smaller, his head is a lot smaller than what it was!”
My best friend who is about 5’7 and has a belly. “Man you look great soon your waist will be my size! You may catch me soon!”
The last one was the best. I might catch you soon? Are you kidding?
Most of the times I pass these off and do not think about them much but after speaking with J I came to the conclusion that sometimes the greatest challenge we face are the ones that are closest to us.
I know that might sound weird but I have more positive reinforcement from complete strangers in regards to meeting my goals than those in my inner circle. Forget about my wife. Yes she is supportive to an extent but I swear she thinks that there is another motive for my fitness obsession.
When I thought about that I thought about others in my inner circle. I really think I have hit on something here. Usually those in your inner circle that can see improvement in you also see non-activity or inactivity in themselves. In looking at me/us they see what they should be doing but are not. It is not really that they are jealous of your improvement or progress but they see in your progress weakness in themselves.
How many of you have gone to eat with family and friends only to be surrounded by dirty foods. “Come on and eat it all your friends/family are eating it!” I swear you would think it was like underage drinking or drugs. All your friends are doing it. Almost like they feel guilty if you are eating baked chicken while they are eating fried foods.
I have even had my wife make chocolate strawberries. You know the type. Hey there is fruit underneath that layer of chocolate so it is healthy right?
My advice for you is to stay the course. When you hit a wall with friends or family, come to this site and voice your challenges, fears or concerns. I can promise you the ear you get here will be much more supportive!
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