AndyaknowV’s BodyBlog

Well, I missed day 4 posting because I was busy sleeping…

Today I put on a pair of slacks that I wore….(put on and took off because I was too ashamed to wear to work)…..that were WAY tooo tight and I wore them to work today….AND THEY WERE LOOSE! I have done really well in losing weight over the past two weeks….I like the diet and it is actually easy for me to not eat anything during the day and not feel hungry or be grumpy….Its just after 530 that I actually start thinking about food and I am not hungry at that time I just want to eat something….Today I drank another lemonade at 530 and that was ok until about 9pm when I forgot that I didnt write this blog….and I was being too lazy to make more lemonade. Well today was kinda sucky because I had a flat tire and by EX made me want to go on a psycho rampage!!!! Whenever I have a convo with that man I feel like I am riding the crazy train and my seatbelt is stuck so I cannot get off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But enough about the crazy. After that BullS#!+,,,,and a few tears,,,,I was good but I wasn’t in the mood for anyone to say anything to me that warrented any type of emotion….I did not want to smile, frown, or anything!  My boyfriend has not been too supportive of the Master Cleanse and gives me a hard time everytime he "happens" to ask me what I had for a meal and I say "lemonade" or "nothing". Don’t get me wrong I understand that not eating is not a good thing to lose weight but I have so much more to lose….pressure, stress, headache (and not the physical kind)…..I internalize way way way too much and I just spend so much time praying and trying to be better so that I can "learn" to not get to stressed or upset or angry when I have encounter that are not the best for me i.e. riding the crazy train.

I am very good at a lot of things and that is what I try and focus on. I do very well at my job and at my schoolwork…..the problem is making good decisions about the people that I encounter or listening to the influences of others because they promise to do/be better than what they show me……too much of the glass half full type thing…always expecting the best from people/situations (and quite often being let down). Just dealing with life has become so toxic for me and  I would like to think and act more clearly! My "friend" was telling me that not eating can kill you….and I was like in comparison to what???eating…which can also kill you. Come on now….after my mom died I stopped eating for a long time and I did not die! I am hard on myself when it comes to my appearance and I dont care….no one loves me as much as I love myself and because they choose a size/look is good for me does not mean that I have to agree….

Well, enough whining about my day……I actually ate spinach today for lunch with a piece of boca pattie because my boyfriend made me feel bad…Which is stupid and of course I gave in….which is even more stupid. AND I wasnt hungry, I just didnt want to hear his mouth. Tomorrow will be better! I guess I will just lie and tell him that I ate when he "happens" to ask. :-` Well, have a wonderful night all and I pray your days and nights are full of love and peace!

V

Well, today is day 3 and I havent really been in the mood for any nonsense today. At work I had less than what I needed to do my job so lets say I was irritated about that….my boyfriend thinks I am trying to kill myself and gives me a hard time about this so lets say I was irritated about that…..but with that and the fact that I am cycling…..I FEEL GREAT!!!!!! I cannot complain really at all. I am not tired, I dont think I am moody - barring what is going on in my day -Overall, I feel pretty darn good. Well, I am drinking the salt think tonight….EWWWWWW it is SOOOOOO nasty. I feel like I am getting hypertension just smelling it…. But anyway I am sure I will be sleepy in a few hours since I normally go to be pretty early. One way that I think is working for me to do the salt thing is to just dissolve the salt in about 1 oz of water and take it like a shot and then chug as much water as I possibly can to try and get to the quart without puking. It actually worked pretty well today and that was about 30-45 minutes ago. Well, I am ready to lay down and rest my head a little bit before the salt "internal cleanse" starts to take effect. Thanks for listening to my griping and complaining. It really is not that bad….just the need to chew something is all. I saw this lady on youtube make popsicles out of her lemonade so that might help!!!!! I will try it and see if it works. Talk to you tomorrow.

V

Well, for some reason I feel GREAT today…..at work I got a little irritated because I didnt have enough work to do and I had to sit bored for a while. But my boyfriend really doesnt care to hear this but I had a GREAT day even after leaving work because I must have just looked like I was feeling great and in a great mood because I was getting macked on at the grocery store….lol!!!!! I was like ok guys…thanks but no thanks….BUT LADIES KEEP IT REAL! IT IS STILL A GOOD FEELING!!! Anyway back to the diet. Today I did the lemonade and it was actually really really good…lol I must be starving….lol….. I am going to try and do the salt thing again but if I cant do it then I am going to cut it out all together and just do the tea in the morning and evening. I am doing the salt thing at night because I am not waking up to that early in the morning and then have to go to work after that!!!! WOW Kudos to those that can do it! After I left the grocery store I came home and then walked to pick up the children from the daycare. Then we walked to Wendy’s and I carried my nearly 50 pound son on my back while talking on the phone…..so needless to say I was tired. When we got to Wendy’s I was not hungry at all I just wanted some food. But I resisted with no problems. For some reason I really feel like I can do this….I mean I have done the Warrior diet for a while and it was not that hard for me to not eat all day, but I thought this would just kill me because with the warrior diet you at least get a four hour window in the day that you can eat food. I thought that I would be a lot more tired and grumpy but I just feel so accomplished!!!! One thing that I can say about this diet is that I am NOT thirsty at all…..I am struggling to drink all of the lemonade….I barely can get in any extra water!!!! I just try to drink every few minutes until it is all gone and believe me it is a challenge for me. I mean I went from drinking a few glasses of whatever each day to nearly 100 oz. Its really like 4-5 times my normal….maybe that is why I feel so good….I am finally hydrated…lol! I was a little timid to workout today because I didnt want to overexert myself and be killed over on the side of the road. That would not be good at all… Well here I go to try and do the salt thing….hopefully i wont gag my guts out. Day 2 is nearly a wrap and I feel GREAT!!!!!!

V

I have been gaining weight off and on for the past couple of weeks and it sucks!!!!!!!!!!!! I gain a few and lose a few!!!!!!! I am soooo tired of it. Today is day 1 of the Master Cleanse detox, I have got to do something radical so that I can get my mind right and get my body on the same page. I mean it feels like I am doing as I should. I try and eat healthy, I try and work out,,,,,yes sometimes I do slip and not eat exactly what I should eat and not workout as hard as I should but COME ON!!!! This plateau crap is enough to drive me batty. It starts off really good and I see a great improvement and then it just stops! It seems like there is nothing that I can do to get it back started again. If I dont lose a single pound on this detox

Well, I am starting anew (for like the millionth time) but this time I am trying to workout more and focus on my food less. I think that i pretty much stay in a good range of calories everyday…the problem is just remembering to eat. My job…is quite the job…..I dont really feel like being in the building all day long so I try and focus on my work as long as I possibly can and then RUN out of the building when it is time to go. I cannot complain about my job, it is just that I am not used to being inside all day long….and I have been there nearly a year lol!

Well, today I worked my butt off at the gym …….HOPEFULLY!!!……..when I left I felt like I was going to puke! I ran for 60 minutes then I got of the bike for a cool down for 15 minutes after that. Problem is !!! I forgot to really eat today!!!! so for breakfast I had a half cup of liquid egg substitute scrambled with pepper and for lunch I had a grilled cheese sandwich on wheat bread. Yeah I know it suck and yeah that was all day…..and yeah that is why I probably felt like I was going to throw up but I AM WORKING ON IT!!! For dinner I am making shrimp with olives and feta cheese. We are also having salad. Sigh,,,,,,I will do better! Tomorrow I dont plan on going to the gym but I am going to ride the bike to the daycare and walk while my daughter rides it to her Taekwondo class. I think that will be a good walk without working out too hard….and I will count that as rest day.  I am pretty proud of myself in the fact that I did make a conscious effort to eat something and I worked out really hards…AND I DID NOT THROW UP!!!

I just want my thighs to go down so bad!! To me they are soooooo ugly. So I am going to continue to focus on cardio for majority of my workouts with exercises that emphasize the lower body ie. running, cycling, step aerobics, etc……Then I am going to sneak in a few squats and lunges on my "rest" days. I still have hope for having an awesome body that I can start shredding by November. Well, I am still feeling great and while I have the energy I am going to do some vaccuming…..Have a WONDERFUL day and I wish u the best!

V