Allure107’s BodyBlog

It is true, its all mental…I have to win the fight on fat lol! The closer I get to my goal the more I unconsciously make make choices that are holding me back. I know this about myself so I have to constantly fight back bad habits. Every choice is a big one…down to choosing to go buy healthy food every two weeks, choosing to cook it, to take a lunch, to eat every 3 hours, to workout. I have to stay strong and see the goal, its so close…140lbs….but sooooo far away. I know I can step it up, I know I can push harder. I just have to execute. I’m so hard on my self but its the only way. No one is going to make my body move, no one will make me go work out but me. So this journey isnt even half way done but proudly I can say I’m closer than I was a year ago. I want it so bad. I want it more now than ever before! Im going to go get it!!! Im ready for a workout! Lets GO!!!!

I’m back in the game, workin out everyday and eating clean! Hell ya! It feels sooo good when I behave good. Why do I stray? So I continue to learn body lessons…my body just does not respond well to heavy meat and junk. I veered off track for a while, never giving up on clean eating but I started to cheat one to many days. I start feeling like crap, my body starts to feel like mush and my energy goes down. So why do I do it to myself????
Its just years of junk food making me feel "good" or what I thought was feeling good. When I compare the fit lifestyle to the junky one…its a no brainer. I want to improve on my fitness and continue to learn my lessons through trail and error. Thank you BB I would nt have made it this far with out you and all the support. Seeing the profiles of women that are hot as hell now..but started out the same as me or bigger is the BEST motivator. I cant wait to show my progress soon!!

I need someone to give me a kick in the booty and get me back into my routine. I didnt wear a bikini this year but I did look smokin hot for the night boat party!! I felt good about myself and I was thinner than I have been in about 6 years. That ‘good feeling’ made me slack on the very things that got me there I started eating out here and there. Skipping work outs….Yikes!!

So I want to say that I didnt go completely crazy…I stuck to my clean eating 75% of the time, but my fitness routine took a back seat to a new job, sickness, a bossy 2yr old and well, life!! The good news is that I managed to lose about 3 measly pounds (not sure how) and I finally got a gym membership thanks to a discount from my new job!! Yesss!!

So right now I’m just struggling with the motivation but I know that the people on BB always inspire me! So I logged on and after looking at profiles for about 20 minutes, I feel pumped all ready! Thanks everyone!!

Well since the last post there has been more sickness, my two year old is more terrible than ever and I just quit my job to start somewhere new and fresh! I have been barely maintaining my progress, gladly haven’t gained a ton, just 2 lbs.

So I’m ready to train hard..I only have til the end of June to make some amazing progress so I can show off at my boat party!! So please wish me luck, send any tips you have my way and look out…cuz I’m ready to get this party started! Ye-ah!

Why is it that when I’m sooo close I can taste it I have to get ill? For the last month instead of high intensity training I have been dealing with high fever? My son just started day care a month ago and has been sick with some strong bacterial virus…then I got it….then hubby and back again. I have continued to eat clean and I am maintaining but I haven’t lost any weight and I’m frustrated. I’m achy, tired and really don’t want to work out! Help!!! I can’t ruin what I have done so far…I have to wear that bikini but time is running out….

I just have to feel better and get off my butt to get my dream results…

Who knew that posting those dreaded pictures would liberate me! It was like. "Here I am! This is a distorted me, what I have been hiding, this is a person I do not want to be!" Once they were posted I felt a drive I have never felt! I feel that I owe it to my husband, to people on Body Building, to my son and most importantly to myself to look better than I ever have! It’s out there…if I do not commit I will fail all these wonderful people. I have even quit smoking cold turkey. I can’t fail now…It can only get better and I  look only to the future, I can see myself lean and fit. I want it. I will never lie to myself again. I will never "hide", I will treat this body right, and give it only the best foods, the best activities! When I turn 30…I will be the hottest wife and mom on the block!

Thank you everyone, and I hope I have inspired someone today…as all of you inspired me when I was at my weakest. Thank you!

I’m sore but I LOVE it!! I could barely go up or down stairs,  it hurts bad, but feels so good I really should have posted my before pics a week ago because I have lost weight all ready! Dam! Well I have enough fat that can wait until tonight to take my "before" pics…to be honest I’ve still been fighting with myself. I’m embarrass to have my hubby take the pictures and really see what I look like! Rolls and all…You know I tricked myself thinking that most of time I  cover myself well enough or only show off my best parts in front of him, I have made my fat ‘invisible’ so that only I know, but thinks no one else can tell. But it’s no secret I’m fat, and yes…he and others must know this by now. Lol. I will just have to get over it and take the dam pic. Facing it is just another step closer to my goal. I must do it tonight!!

I’m still ready to kick ass but I’m not looking forward to taking a full length body shot front and back…Oh God help us all! Lol! Sooo I been putting it off all weekend but I think I’m ready. Its what I need, to see it all hang out, once I post it up for everyone to see…I know that I will kick into high gear.So pretty soon my big fat Puerto Rican booty will be posted for all to see it transformed into a nice tight booty! Yeah!
Plus I have mentally been preparing myself, I dusted off my gym mat, got my kettlebell out…I’m ready!! Lets do it, come on guys!!! Whooohooo!

So…I joined the Hydroxy cut Transformation contest…I have never ever ever done anything like this before. I am giddy like a school girl. I really can’t believe that this contest has provoked all these good feelings and an extra surge in motivation! I may not win or even come close but I know it will be a step towards being the best me I can be! Who knows, I may kick ass and get to the top…. it’s free to dream!
Wish me luck I need everyone’s support and prayers!

This morning was a good morning indeed! A button came off my favorite black coat and I had to put another one on last minute. Then I remembered that last year I bought a nice brown one from Target. At the time I needed a coat with flexibility because I travel with my baby, diaper bags and work bag. I remember trying on many many coats, they all ‘made’ me look fat! I decided on the brown one.

Today I grab the same coat and throw it on on top of my jean jacket and rush out the door. I drop the baby off at my moms…she gasps, "My goodness, last year that coat was bursting open". This criticism hurts, because it was true. Then the criticism excites me, because it is no longer true!

When I look I finally realize…the coat is extremely big on me! I even have another jacket underneath! I could not put on the brown one and a heavy sweater underneath because the buttons wouldn’t close! I looked at the tag….it is a XXL I was much fatter than I cared to admit. I was in denial. I was lazy and even though I had started eating healthy, I still cheated often and didn’t do any physical activities.

Good bye XXL….I am soo happy to let you go, and motivated to keep pushing myself to look how I have always wanted to look!

p.s.

I put up photos of the coat…which I will be taking to be altered. Don’t want to get rid of a brand new coat!