Adina’s Cute & Perky Blog!

Happy Monday, Cute and Perky readers!!!

Did you have a good weekend?  I did!!!  I went to a Halloween party at the lake!

I didn’t wear a costume, because the party was hosted by my two gay best friends.  And trust me, there was NO way I could out-do their costumes!!!  Not a chance!!

But I was talking to my buddy Ron Harris over the weekend.  If you’re an MD reader, Ron wrote the article in this month’s issue about Victor Martinez.  Y’all know by now that he’s my favorite bodybuilder!  So, we’ll let Ron be my favorite writer!

Ron has a new book out about bodybuilding and I was telling him how excited and anxious I am for my two sons to read it.  Here’s the link to it:  www.ronharrismuscle.com/book/.

I would love for you to check in out!

But did you catch what I said? 

I’m excited. 

And I know y’all are used to me being excited…and perky and all.  But it goes deeper then that.

I am truly excited to get that book for my boys, because living a healthy lifestyle and being a good example to my sons excites me.

How many people do you know who dread going to the gym or would rather peel their fingernails off one by one than eat healthy?

And how many times is it because we have made the healthy lifestyle look anything less than desirable?

I can tell people how much better being this size is, but it means nothing if I gripe and complain about every workout or every meal.

If I want people to join me in this way of life, I have to make it look like a way of life worth living.

My oldest son told me the other day, “Mom, other people don’t look at going to the gym the same way you do.”

And he’s right.

I get excited about it.

Because every time I set foot in that gym and that metal touches my hand or I eat my next healthy meal, I am creating a better me.

And that is something to get excited about!

So as I sit to write this Blog, I’m a little bit hungry and a little bit sore from an AWESOME leg work out. I have learned to appreciate these feelings as signs of success. 

Too many times I looked too far into the future to mark my success.  But now I know better. If I’m just a little bit hungry at the end of the day, that means my new diet is kicking in gear.  SUCCESS! 

If my legs are sore, then I gave my all on leg day.  SUCCESS! Made it through a birthday party without cake today?  SUCCESS! 

Got back on track today after three days off?  SUCCESS! Every failed attempt I made at losing weight included the idea that the only way to measure success lay in making it to goal.<strong />

But just like any sport where making a goal is involved, there are usually many successful plays that lead up to that goal.  Sure making it to goal is your ultimate measure of success, but it’s not your only one.  Fail to recognize these small successes, and you fail to recognize the little steps you are taking in the right direction.  

You will not make it to goal by taking one giant step.  You will make it there through repeated, small successful steps.  Think of it this way.  If the journey of a thousand miles begins with just one step, what one step would you remove and still make it to goal?  Learn to appreciate each successful stop you make, because you will have to repeat it many times over to make it.<strong />

Your journey of a thousand miles begins and ends with one successful day.  And each one is equally as important, and deserves to be celebrated. And…as always…I’m proud of each successful day you have.  And I love it when you drop by to tell me about it!

I keep very few reminders in the house of my heavier days.  No real reason.  There’s just not much of anything around that brings back that time in my life.

But a coat hanger caught my eye the other day.  It still had the plastic tab from the store. 
Size XXL.

What a miserable size that was for me.

I remember thinking I had wasted my life away, and that I was doomed to live with regrets the rest of my life.  I actually remember that I was thinking I had waited too late to get started.

That was before I did anything about it, of course.

But now I’ve been this size for about two years.  I’m set in my exercise ways.  My eating habits are firmly in place.

And although I spent over twenty years morbidly obese, I really don’t remember being any other way then the way I am right now.

They say when you quit smoking, after a given time it’s as if you never smoked.  Your lungs heal and forgive you. 

I guess that’s where I am in my weight loss journey.  I’ve been this way long enough that I forgave myself, and it’s as if I was never anything but the way I am now.

I spent a lot of time fretting over events I let pass me by because I wasn’t at optimal size.  I tore up many a picture from special occasions for the way I looked in my “little” black dress. 

I started my diets years after I should have, out of depression for what I let get away from me. 

But here’s what I didn’t know…

When I made it to goal, a whole new world of Special events would open up to me.  I would have more reasons to wear little black dresses.  And sometimes I would wear a little black dress to the grocery store or Wal-Mart, just because I could.

Every day is a special occasion when you’re happy with your life!  WOO HOO!!!

And no matter what age you reach goal, there are more special events and reasons to get dressed up than you can imagine.

It’s never too late to get started.  You have things to do, places to go, and people to see.

Get after it.

And if you’re a guy…I have absolutely no clue what the guy equivalent of a little black dress is.  Somebody fill me in!

So we made it through the storm this weekend.  Trees were down all around us, debris everywhere, and wind like I have never seen.  But my people were safe, and that is all that matters.

We did have about 36 hours without electricity.  It’s funny how life changes in an instant.

You start thinking of thing you can do to fill your time, only you can’t do any of them.

Like, “Oh I know, I’ll get caught up on my E-mail.”  Can’t do that!

Or…”This would be a good time to get caught up on those movies I’ve been meaning to watch.”  And the Rocket Scientist within me reminds me that I can’t!

But the funniest thing we all kept doing was flicking the switches.  All day long, any time a room was entered or exited a switch was flicked.  When I went to bed, and the house was completely void of all light, I flicked off that switch as I climbed into the bed.

But of course, that’s because it’s a rote skill.  I don’t have to think about it, I just do it.

And I have learned to make living a healthy lifestyle this way.

Every night, I do the things necessary to ensure that going to the gym is just going to happen.

It’s like flicking a switch, y’all.  It’s that simple.

I pack my cooler.

I make my shakes.

I lay out my gym clothes.

And when the next day comes, it’s as simple as flicking a switch!

I eat from my cooler.  SWITCH!

I dress from my gym gag.  SWITCH!

I post my Blog.  SWITCH!

It’s as simple as that.  I don’t even have to think about it anymore.  I put all of those things in my rote memory, and I just do them.

But even when the lights went out, I still lived the lifestyle!  I read Muscular Development and handwrote my Blog by the light of the kerosene lamp.  It may have been dark, but by golly that switch still lit for me!

OK, I realize y’all are going to think I’m catty here, but I’m going to tell you anyway.

Besides, by now you have begun to realize that my mental filter isn’t on that tight anyway.

There is this guy at my gym who consistently asks me out. I don’t believe any man has ever tried this hard to get my attention. He’s given me his number. He’s left me messages. He’s gotten friends to try to help him out. He’s done everything short of riding a goat through the middle of the gym proclaiming his undying love for me.

All to no avail.

And let me tell you why.

The man has….oh, I can barely bear to say it….CHICKEN LEGS.

Chicken legs, y’all. Chicken legs.

He’s tall. He’s dark. He’s got the chest and biceps of a linebacker, and the legs any twelve year old girl would be proud to call hers.

I swear if you just blew on him from across the room he would topple over. He’s THAT top heavy.

And every time he speaks to me, all I can hear are Charlie Brown phone voices. Because my mind is just screaming to ask him, “Why?”

Why would he purposely do this to his physique? At what point don’t you stop and say, “Oh no. I better fix that.”?

But to a lesser extent, I see so many people doing the same things. He represents a package that is less than whole.

Are you lifting heavy, but not eating clean? You may not have chicken legs, but you’re not the whole package.

Do you need to lose weight, but refuse to go to the gym? Dieting without exercise is not the whole package either.

What about eating clean all day long, yet skipping breakfast? That’s not whole.

You may not have chicken legs to flaunt, but if you are not working on the complete package, it’s going to show someday, somewhere, or some time.

No breakfast? That noon time gym session won’t be what it could have been.

Dieting without exercising? You are dramatically changing the rate at which you progress.

Not eating to fuel that lifting?  Muscles aren’t built on cheese doodles.

From time to time you need to take a step back and evaluate what you are doing. See if the sum of your parts add up to a whole.

Because y’all…I don’t care how nice your pecs are, no one looks good with the chicken legs.

There is this one lady at my gym that has been going close to a year now.

I see her sweat.

I see her lift.

I’ve seen her cooler packed with healthy choices.

She is faithful to come. Week in and week out she comes.

But she has yet to lose a pound. In fact, she has gained. I would guess about twenty pounds in the last year.   So, she needs to lose about eighty pounds now.

I had been wanting to approach her, because my heart cries out to help those who need to lose. But I have learned to wait for them to come to me.

And she finally did. One day in the dressing room as I was changing she said, “I can’t wait to be skinny like you.”

(And don’t we just love being called that?! I liked her right off, y’all! I liked her right off!!!)

So, I started building a relationship with her. Waiting for the day she would ask for my help. But you know?   She never did.

So, I finally broke down one day. She was so helpless looking. Face red, heart pounding. Still carrying a book with pictures of exercise after nine months of going to the gym. And y’all, if you can make a baby in nine months, you can certainly learn enough to wean yourself from a book!

So I ask her about her plan. She tells me a little bit about what she is doing. And I say, “You know, if you ever want some help, I can tell you what I did.”

And I’m not a personal trainer. I was not offering her anything other than to show her what worked for me.

But her response said it all, “That’s OK. I’ve got this book.”

So another three months has passed with nary a change in site. And she still carries that book.

But what I take with me is this. The forty-five minutes I see her at the gym are only a small piece of her day. And it doesn’t really matter how hard you work in your time at the gym if you don’t live it the rest of your day.

I’m going to the gym today. I will spend the same amount of time there as my friend.

But I will also live it the rest of the day…and that is what makes the difference.

I live the gym life all day long. That makes my forty-five minutes in the gym count.

It’s a lifestyle people, it’s a lifestyle. Welcome to the gym.

Have you ever caught a really little child in a lie about what they just ate? 

Years ago, I remember teaching the little two and three year olds in church choir.  I decided it would be fun to bring play dough for them. 

OK.  I was only 16, and it did seem like a good idea at the time. 

Now I know, there is a special place in hell for the creator of that colorful concoction of gelatinous goo.  What was he thinking?  I know it was a man, because every woman knows that was a bad idea.  I mean, you play with it outside, it gets too dry.  Play with it inside, it gets….everywhere.  Every nook and every cranny.  Got something stain-free?  That just means it’s still a play dough virgin.

So, anyway, back to choir.

I look across the room to little Adam Paul Williams.   He’s either contracted the mumps since entering the room or is in the middle of eating a can of play dough.  Judging by the blue lips, my instincts tell me the child is eating my dough.  It was homemade dough too.  Did I tell y’all that?  He was eating my homemade play dough.

So I calmly walk across the room, and as firmly as I can say, “Adam Paul Williams!”

Y’all, it’s hard to be firm looking at that.  I don’t care who you are, that’s cute!

He snaps to attention.  Eyes wide.  Cheeks full.  Bits of dough covering all orifices I can see.  I’m sure it was in his belly button too.  I have no doubt.  You would have to know this child.

So, once I have his attention I sternly say, “Are you eating my play dough?”

Now, what can you possibly do to answer a question with a mouth full of THAT and gooey evidence all over your face and hands?

Why, you lie.

“Noggy man.  I promaigad.”  (In play dough, that would be, “No ma’am.  I promise.”)

To this day, that is one of my fondest memories.  And he and I share the same birthday.  So, every September 13th when I send my former choir boy a message, I remind him of it.  We have laughed so long and so hard over that.  And you bet your bottom dollar, when he has children, they will get some play dough from Ms. Adina!!!

But, people….listen here!

(That caught y’all off guard, didn’t it?)

Lying about what you eat ceases to be cute after age 3. 

Do not walk into work with a diet bar and an apple and say you don’t know why you can’t lose any more weight. 

Do not say you practice portion control when you are in front of people, when you don’t at home.

And do not tell me that no matter what you do you can’t seem to lose.

You have a mouth full of dough, and I can see it from across the room.  And it isn’t cute.

Do not lie about what you eat.  Especially, do not lie to yourself.

I see so many people who live the diet life at work, which is to say, in front of others, yet they go home and eat like there is no tomorrow.

Well, guess what?  There is a tomorrow, and you need to get fit and healthy to enjoy it!

And there is really only one way to eat.  And that is clean.  And that is all the time.

Learn a way you need to eat, and practice it every day.  Do not eat one way in front of people, and another way at home.

And certainly, do not eat in such a way that you feel you need to lie about it.  Because if you feel you need to lie, you are just not eating the right thing.

Step away from the play dough.  You’re not fooling anybody but yourself.
 

There comes a time when you have to assess what you are doing to see if it is working.  And as harsh as it sounds, there comes a time you have to admit defeat and try something different.

Extreme low carb dieting did not work for me.  Now, I could not tell you why.  I have no clue.  I read the books.  I did it letter perfect.  I lost weight the first week, never to lose again. 

And after three or four months of it not working, and even registering a gain, I admitted defeat and moved on to the next thing.

After a year of jogging produced only a 27 pound loss, I had to admit this method was not going to work for me either.  Unless I was OK with not making goal till 2038.

Sometimes, we think that we can force something to work for us.  I wanted that jogging to work for me in the worst way.  But who wouldn’t want that to work?  You see, I made no changes to my eating habits.  And who wouldn’t run a few miles a day to eat anything they wanted to?

But reality had to kick in.  I had to admit that my plan failed.

I was all about the low carb thing as well.  My goodness, you bet this 256 pound chick wanted that way of eating to work.  I mean, I could eat as much meat as I wanted.  What obese person wouldn’t love this?  This is practically a dream come true.

But I felt bad.  My skin grew sallow.  My energy plummeted more each day.  And, I don’t want to scare you, but….I….wasn’t….perky.  I was bleak.  I was moody. 

And, y’all…Adina doesn’t do moody.  I have three moods: perky, perkier, and disgustingly, vomit-inducing perky.

So…again, I had to admit defeat.

But admitting defeat did not make me lose the war.  It meant I had to go back and prepare myself for battle.  It meant I had to find another method of attack.

And you know what?  I won that war, because I was brave enough to admit defeat.

Two roads diverged, and I took the one many take, but few stay on.

Look at what you are doing.  If you have been doing the same thing for six months with no changes, it’s time to do something different.

They say insanity involves doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.  Doesn’t that make obesity eating the same thing over and over expecting to lose weight?
Today might just be a good day to raise your white flag and admit defeat.

You can’t make a plan of attack if you are stuck in a fox hole.

This will be as close as you see me get to venting…but hold onto your hats.  Reading experience to follow!

Whenever I have the same event happen twice in a small time frame, my mind immediately thinks I must get this point across to my readers.  Well, twice in the last few days I have made someone mad by not replying to their cries for help quickly enough.

People, people, people, listen here!  (Y’all know my feathers are ruffled because I said your name three times.)

YOUR weight loss is YOUR responsibility and YOURS alone.

I get quite a few calls for help.  I spend probably 20 hours a week answering E-mail questions for help and guidance.  If you message me, and I hope you do, you can count on a two week lag time before I reply.  Especially if you want some specific help.

I always open my messages each day to make sure nothing needs immediate attention, but as a general rule, it will take me some time to get back to you.

But twice in the last few days, once in person and once through the message boards I was requested to come up with a diet for two different people….with absolutely no information given to me.  And this is something I am more than happy to do, but this takes time.  You see, I don’t keep generic responses.  I read each request and take it to heart…and reply to each as an individual worthy of spending time on.

And here’s where it gets sticky….in both cases, the asker gave up on me and griped when I didn’t give a response in less than 24 hours.   They gave up. That fast. 

Or did they really give up on themselves?  Again.

If you are putting all your eggs in someone else’s basket…don’t. 

Carry your own. 

When I started out, I had no clue either. 

I would sit on the floor for hours at the diet and nutrition section of Books-A-Million and read.  I became a walking encyclopedia of diets.  I knew them all.  I even read the ones I had no intention of trying….like the Blood Type diet.  I’m not going to ever try that…but I could tell you about it.  I’m O+.  I should eat the Akins way.  See.  I read.  I learned.  I studied.  I knew.  I knew them ALL.

I did the same with cardio.  I sat on the floor and read every book about every form of cardio I could find.  I read about running marathons when I could only walk a mile. 

And, you guessed it, I did the same thing with lifting.  I got this information more from the magazine section though.  I sat and looked at pictures of proper forms for weeks before I ever ventured from the free weights to actually practice what I saw.

No one is born with the skills to build a sculpted body.  It’s a learned skill.

No one is born knowing what diet works best for them, again, it’s a learned skill.

So to use, “I don’t know where to start,” will simply not cut it.

If you are expecting someone else to do all the thinking and all the working for you, or if you give up in less than 24 hours waiting for a reply….you do not want it as badly as I did.

Get up.  Dust yourself off.  Go to the bookstore.

There is a book with your name on it.

But….you might want to start with The Power of Positive Thinking….because that’s what it’s going to take, my friend.  That’s what it’s going to take.