I Really Don’t Know Where the Toilet Paper Is
No matter what I look like or what I wear, I will be asked at any given store where something is. I mean I could be in the middle of Wal-Mart in a prom dress and a tiara, and someone would ask me where the toilet paper is. I don’t know why, I just know it’s part of being me.
After seeing countless fallen faces and red cheeks through the years, I have learned to diffuse the asker’s embarrassment before it even starts. When someone asks me where something is, or how long the wait is, or what time the store closes, I say, “I don’t know. Let’s go find out.” They may still be embarrassed that they asked a completely random stranger rather than an employee, but the shock of my walking them through the store usually takes over! Hard to feel the sting of embarrassment when a random stranger has turned finding the public restroom into a game of “let’s meet a stranger”!
I believe people cross your path for a reason. So I have learned to view this personal phenomenon as an opportunity to both meet people and help people…and yeah, spare them from some embarrassment.
I have helped many a harried Christmas shopper find their last minute gifts. And yes. I have been dressed in a skirt and pumps and helped a little old lady find the toilet paper. And it was WAY at the back of the store. No wonder she couldn’t find it.
With that in mind, it came as no surprise to me that I got a panicked call from one of my two best friends last night. I was actually just finishing up my daily blog after spending the day helping my gym buddies move. I was looking forward to a hot bath followed by reading something in Muscular Development before I crashed.
My friend had panic in his voice, so I knew I had better come right away.
I get to his lake house, where an afternoon of panic has ensued… A boat had sunk. Various methods to get it back in were failing right and left. There was food left unattended on the stove. No one was where they were supposed to be. Phones were lost.
My other best friend’s dad came to tow the boat out, and this is where I come in! His truck started overheating rapidly. He gets out of the vehicle to see about the situation. Wind slams the door shut…and the keys are now locked in the car of an overheated truck…..with the motor running.
Now, do I know anything about getting keys out of locked trucks? No. Do I know anything about vehicles overheating? No. But am I surprised that I was asked to help? No!!! I’m just secretly glad I’m not in a dress and pumps!
But in moments like these, you really learn the value of being fit and not being overweight.
I leap from my car to see Stuart and Earl fanatically trying to get the door unlocked. Being new to the situation, I am not upset, so I can see clearly what they cannot….they are going at it from the wrong angle. The tool they are using is too short to use from the top, and they are trying to feel their way and not see their way.
So, I climb onto the front of the truck, and crawl my way to the windshield. From this vantage point I can effectively use the tools to unlock the door. I can reach it and I can see it.
And when it was all said and done, and things were quiet again, I was pondering how I would not have been able to do that when I was 256 pounds. I would not have been strong enough to pull myself up onto the truck. And I would have worried that I was too heavy to crawl across the truck even if I had been able to.
I had to use balance and power to hold myself up with my left arm, while at the same time using the strength in my right arm to use the tool. Balance and power come from athleticism. Not from obesity. Strength comes from lifting weights, not from lifting my fork to my mouth.
And when it was over, and hands were extended to let help me down from the hood of the truck, I did not have to worry that the hands that reached for me would not be able to hold up 256 pounds. And because I am now fit, I don’t even need outstretched hands. I can jump down, thank you very much! It’s just a little plyometrics!
And when I help little old ladies find toilet paper on the second to last aisle of the store, I now view it as a chance to burn calories, and I am not out of breath when I get there.
Being fit brings something good to my life each and every day.






July 4, 2008 at 10:35 pm
Awesome post
July 4, 2008 at 11:20 pm
right out of a movie *lol*