Synchronistic Demitasse and the Lie of I
Today’s Run: 3.00, 6.07
Run Time: 28:04 (9:22 minute mile), 1:11:08 (11:43 minute mile)
Total Miles to Date: 594.2m
Thoughts on the Run:
Had to sneak in two run entries today, because I ran late last night and didn’t journal it and then again this morning. Just need a weight training session and I’m golden for the week.
I had an interesting experience with affirmations this week. Some people dismiss affirmations as "fluff" and of course many people recall the comedy spoof of Stuart Smalley.
However, here is my take: first, we all know we have thoughts going through our heads every day. Unfortunately, as I describe in the Weight Loss Mindset, most of those thoughts are random. Thoughts create many events in our reality. They drive what we perceive, how we interpret it, and how we feel as a result. Many of our actions are direct reactions to our thoughts. So in that sense, an affirmation is a thought we think on purpose to take control of the process. Instead of thinking lots of random thoughts, we choose to think the thoughts we desire to achieve a positive result. It’s more “realistic thinking” than “positive thinking.”
I guess the other point is that anyone can be scientific about it and just try it. If it doesn’t work, dismiss it. Me? I decided to write some affirmations daily as part of this segment of my journey, and in the process my subconscious revealed itself.
You see, one of the affirmations I was writing is one I learned from Fredric Lehrman. The affirmation goes like this: “The more I love myself the way I am, the more I am the way I want to be.” It’s an interesting thought and when you really look into it, it can reveal many ideas.
So I began by copying the affirmations but after a few days had them memorized. Just last night I was writing them down and suddenly felt strange. I wrote a sentence and it felt like I hadn’t written it the same as the sentence before that. So, I looked at my page, and this is what it looked like (I was writing that affirmation five times):
“The more I like myself the way I am, the more I am the way I want to be.”
“The more I like myself the way I am, the more I am the way I want to be.”
“The more I love myself the way I am, the more I am the way I want to be.”
It was that last sentence that jumped out at me. Then I looked it over, and smiled. What a subtle change in language, but how revealing! So I went back through the previous days to see. Sure enough, some days were, “The more I like myself…” and other days were, “The more I love myself…”
Interesting, no? So I found that my self-perception was changing based on external events and my mood. Funny thing to contemplate, since I am always, well, me. This will tie into the “lie of I” in a minute, but I’ll go on a tangent first. So … I drew attention to the fact that some days I was not giving myself the confidence, respect, and most importantly, love I deserve, and now that affirmation is more powerful because I focus on the “love” aspect and it drives my thoughts and self-perception throughout the day.
On a side note my wife bought some great Italian espresso the other day. I was going to make a cup and remembered we have two lovely demitasse sets. So, I pulled down one to have my espresso in … it was wonderful. Then I remembered how I came to own those sets. It’s a story of synchronicity.
See, these thoughts are connected. I was talking about affirmations and thoughts. Perhaps a more tangible example of thought driving reality is less how we change, but more how our environment does. For example, we have a lovely little Indian restaurant near our house. They would serve drinks in these beautiful demitasse cups. I am a fan of coffee and have all of the coffee makers from stove top and espresso to French press and everything in between. But we never had a good demitasse set.
My wife and I talked about it often and decided we were ready to receive a set. It hadn’t been a priority, the sets aren’t extremely expensive, but we’d always been focused on other ideas. So, the thought was in our mind that it was time to receive a set.
Then our life shifted dramatically because we made the decision to pack up and move to South Dakota. We weren’t even sure if we’d find decent espresso in South Dakota and didn’t want to pick up a nice set and then have to move it across the country, so we stopped focusing on that. The intention had been set (the command issued, as I speak about in Command and Control) and then released.
Apparently, our thoughts were focused more powerfully than we imagined, because the next week something very interesting happened. First, we were having dinner at the Indian restaurant. We knew the owner well and were sharing with him our journey and the fact we would be moving to South Dakota. He paused, and said, “Wait a second…” and went into the back of the restaurant. When he returned, he had a box in his hand … a beautiful demitasse set with the cups and dishes decorated with gold overlays. “Here, take this, my gift to you.” What a wonderful gift!
But that was not the end of it. Our daughter had a very good friend in school with parents from the Middle East. The last time we visited with them, her mother handed us a package. “I wanted to get you a unique gift … something you wouldn’t be able to find in South Dakota.” And it was another beautiful demitasse set!
Now you could argue that maybe we mentioned that we liked the set or were looking for the set and that people knew and this is what led them to the gifts, that’s fine, and that’s a perfectly valid explanation. I’m not concerned with HOW the gifts came to us, but the idea that we fixed a thought, created an intention, released it, and it came back to us. The universe provided.
Here is where the skeptics get bent all out of shape and say, “How could the Universe or God etc etc care about whether or not you have a stupid demitasse set?” Of course, does God care if my bouncy ball bounces? Who am I to know His will … only that gravity will guarantee it does. There are laws of nature that operate and some are more subtle than others.
So here I stepped outside this morning to go on a longer run. It was hot. Despite hitting the road at 9:30 AM it was already 95 degrees with a ton of humidity. I came well prepared with 2 16oz bottles, one with water and one with an electrolyte mix. The heat was bearing down on me but I am getting acclimated and had lots of fluids so I pounded my way through it.
On the last stretch I was heading up a long hill (seemed long to me: 900 ft to 1100 ft steady climb over 1.1 miles) and out in the sun. No shade. I was getting dizzy and slowing down. My mantra was that I would not stop … I may go slow, but would not stop. My body was trying to convince me otherwise and then I heard the sound of feet pounding on pavement. At first I thought it was my own but the pace was faster. I gathered the strength to look up and a well-muscled man about my age was trucking up the hill. He was blasting by me and had plenty of energy (yes, he even smiled and waved and then kept on going).
It was an inspirational moment because I knew that I would make it to the top of the hill without stopping. But more importantly, I saw myself. That was me. That is who I am, always have been. The tired, exhausted, injured, and other “masks” I’ve worn as a runner are all lies. They are the “lie of I” and I am me, unchanging, as I mentioned at the start of this post … on that hill was simply the opportunity to become more of who I already am, to turn myself inside out. It was a great feeling.
So with thoughts of demitasse and affirmations and sychronicity, I crested the hill, downed some more drink, and made my way back home.
Until next time,
Originally posted: Synchronistic Demitasse and the Lie of I
