12weekhardbody’s BodyBlog

to secretly wish that my younger son would lose his ****in fingers for the next few years.  The little guy has been breaking **** all the ****ing time. Today he broke an antique table and a book.   I realize that the things he is breaking are just things (but… so are fingers, dammit).  The things CAN  can be fixed (his fingers COULD be too…my husband makes artificial limbs INCLUDING fingers…he could even make him specialized nose picking fingers).  

Alright perhaps the more humane (?) thing would be a straight jacket.  He would not be able to pick up things that I place on counters out of his way. He would not be able to pinch his brother or throw **** again.  If I told him to stop doing something and he said "no" then I could push him down and make him roll (he think rolling is fun).  I could carry him like a football (when running, especially when it’s raining outside).

OR perhaps I could have a plastic bubble set up in our house.  He’d have total use of his hands, arms, everything.  We’d still be able to see him and play with him.  He would be allowed to have his own things in his bubble BUT none of my ****, my husband’s, or his older brother’s.  He should stay REALLY healthy being away from germs.

Just a thought-

I’ll admit that I have a potty mouth.  I curse when I lift, when I cook, when I drive.  I have even cursed in church (quietly though, I am respectful).  

Since I had my boys I have mastered the art of under-the-breath cursing and, damn, I am good at it.

I may have messed up once or twice in front of the boys but tried to play it off.  

I have mad skills and could do this professionally.  Yep, I could be a professional profaneteer if ever I could find the demand.

I have been singing the alphabet to my 2-1/2 year old son the way it was intended from "A" to "Z" just like you would hear on Sesame Street.  Anyway, my son was walking through the house the other day in front of my husband saying the alphabet.  Only his version has been condensed.  He sang, "Aaaa, Bbbbb, Kkkkk, FU."  Well, at least he got the important ones .

I don’t think he will be asked to guest star with Elmo anytime soon .

I have eaten for 4 weeks now and feel like I am unstoppable!

I got a giant cookie cake for my husband and father-in-law yesterday.  I opened the box, smelled it, cut some slices, and gave them to my boys and their cousin.  My FIL asked if I was eating any and I told him that I wasn’t.  I explained how I would have to pay my trainer $100 and didn’t feel like it was worth it.

Last Friday my trainer suggested that I do a competition.   Who?  Me??

I have really been giving it some thought.  I went to one a few weeks ago and thought about what it would be like to compete.  While I was there, one of the figure lady’s kid yelled, "Way to go , mama!"  I think I would burst out into tears from o much joy if I competed and one of my boys cheered for me.  (Hmmmm do people that cry at competitions EVER win?)

So my plan is to continue eating the way I am.  I am (for real this time) going to do cardio at least three times a week.  REALLY!  I’ll see where this gets me in the next month.  Then, I’ll decide since the comp I am thinking about doing is in October.  That would give me roughly 12 weeks before the excitement really begins!

Last week i did deadlifts in some weird bar thing where you step in the middle of the bar and hold the bar at your sides instead of in front of you.  I liked doing those because it was much easier to grip (my forearms usually give out in bb deadlifts).

I also did dumbbell lateral raises and was able to do more weight than I thought I could.  I usually do those on a machine.  The last time I did them using dumbbells, I think, I only used 5 or maybe 7.5#.  Yesterday it was 20# and I’ll be shooting for 25# soon.

Today I did close-grip chest press and immediately did bench jumps .  I LOVED the jumps!  I had to do a squat and make my glutes touch the bench and then explode up.  My trainer did let me step down which was nice on my knees.  I was afraid I would fall on my face but I cranked those mofo’s out.  

It’s great feeling to exceed your expectations!!!